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Destiny31's Corner

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What Are You Doing? Chapter 3: The Importance of Boyfriends.

Before we start this clusterfuck of a chapter, wine status: glass is full. There is no way to read this shit sober. Warning: it IS as bad as you are imagining. Go ahead and grab the fortifying beverage of your choice. I'll wait. :-P With that, let's go meet Teh Ebil Whore!

We open the chapter with a pencil (I think? I'm no art major.) drawing of a city street, complete with high rise buildings. No idea why, because, for some reason, Boring Plot Device is INTENTIONALLY having lunch with Nosy Busybody in the fucking park. Run Boring Plot Device, RUN! You are running out of chances to get Nosy Busybody's hooks out of you! Anyway, their quiet lunch is about to spoiled by the arrival of Teh Ebil Whore.

Teh Ebil Whore walks up, and immediately starts being horrible, because she's an evil whore and we DEFINITELY can't make her likeable in any way. Sigh. She launches into a rant about how Boring Plot Device never called her. Now, the implication, at least the way I read it, in the first chapter was that the date where Teh Ebil Whore came on to poor, innocent Boring Plot Device was a first date. Apparently, it wasn't. They had been going out long enough for Teh Ebil Whore to think that they were in a relationship. The writing is all over the place, and I'm not quite sure if they went out a couple of times or the relationship had been ongoing.


Jessie: No. But when a guy takes a girl out a couple of times in a row, and they get all interested in each other, then she expects he will call again, no?

Sakal: I did not know. So, dating, at least if you date ‘a couple of times’ and ‘you get all interested in each other’, implies obligations.

Jessie: Say, Andrew, who is this guy, anyway? He asks weird questions.

Ok, so, I'm honestly not an expert on dating (mister destiny was my first serious boyfriend and we've been together for twenty years), but I feel like Teh Ebil Whore's expectations here were valid. The text implies that she is being unreasonable and irrational, but if I had been going out with a man long enough that I felt like there was enough there to initiate sex, I would expect the man to call me, and to have the courtesy to break up with me before he asks out The Good Girl. I'm not sure how mainstream the expectation is, but I feel like she's being mistreated by the narrative here.

Oh, Teh Ebil Whore, I was all set to like you, and you had to go and ruin it. Why????? Boring Plot Device's response to her "Who is this guy?" was that he was a friend that knows the Bible and they were talking about dating. Her response is basically, "Ohlala, y'all gonna fuck?" Sigh. The way it comes across is petty and anti-gay, and that's one of my biggest hot button issues. Boring Plot Device is, of course, horrified at the implication, because god forbid anyone think he was gay. BRB, going for another glass of wine.


Andrew: No!! [Blushing] I meant we were talking about dating. He’s not from here and doesn’t know about dating...

Jessie: Oh, like from overseas. Cool! You do look kind of foreign. So what do you want to know about dating?

Oh Teh Ebil Whore....NO NO NO NO NO! How does ANYONE look "kind of foreign"? Perhaps I should introduce her to my BFF, who is a native born American who happens to be Latino, or another friend of mine who looks as stereotypically American as you could ever imagine, and is in fact from Wales. Fuck you and your casual racism Mr. Ohlman (who is a creeper). *takes a sip.

Nosy Busybody asks Teh Ebil Whore what she was expecting out of dating Boring Plot Device, and wow, she comes across so. fucking. young here. She gives all the standard "worldly girl" reasons: someone to do stuff with, someone to talk about with her girlfriends, the fact that a boyfriend helps complete her, and someone to hang out with so she isn't lonely. Poor Ebil Whore. She sounds so unhappy. I want to sit her down and help her find something that actually completes her, and be her friend. Even though she says the most unlikable things, I still can't help but like her.


Sakal: [Turning back to Andrew] But you were tempted to think it was OK?

Andrew: [Nods glumly]

Jessie: What’s wrong with us sleeping together? It isn’t like Andrew and I had just met! We’d been going out for quite a while.

Ok book, we have been back and forth between a couple dates and going out for quite a while. WHICH ONE IS IT? If they have been going out for a while, I think I may have to change Boring Plot Device's name to Asshole Plot Device. Anyway, we go through the silly "women don't really want sex, they really just want someone to love them" trope, and sweet baby J, send help and more wine. I just ran aground, and I'm so close to the end that I don't want to go upstairs to get another glass. Of COURSE, women don't want sex because they like orgasms, noooooo, they only want someone to love them. I mean, of course, nearly everyone wants someone to love them, but why the shit are we playing to this shitty sterotype?


Jessie: Of course. Sex is fun, but it is really the relationship that is important for the girl. Let’s face it, nowadays everybody knows if you don’t put out the guy won’t like it and then he’ll drop you.

Sakal: I had thought that might be part of the reason. So when Andrew turned you down for sex, and then when he didn’t call you for a date the next week...

Jessie: I got the picture! He didn’t want me anymore. But it would have been nice of him to have told me!

Yes Ebil Whore, it really would have been. Asshole Plot Device, take a note. Let's not fuck this up again. Well, I'm sure you won't because it's pretty clear you are going to buy The Good Girl from her Salesman Headship, and live happily ever after, but still. I hope you end up feeling bad about this, but let's face it, Ebil Whore is just a plot device as well, not a real, fleshed out character, and now that Asshole Plot Device has dumped her for The Good Girl, we will probably never see her again.

Ebil Whore stomps off angrily (and good for her. Nosy Busybody is being a condescending asshole to her.), so we have to move on to the tried and true pieces of the heart are gone bullshit. I actually sort of agree with Nosy Busybody just a bit here:


Sakal: Perhaps you need to examine not just your goals, but the other person’s goals, when you begin a relationship. It seems when Jessie accepted your invitation to ‘date’, she heard more than you thought you were saying. She had hopes that your request to date was the first step toward something much more serious: in her eyes, a ‘relationship’. You, on the other hand, were just looking to ‘have fun’.

You not only ‘took her out’ once, but several times, and her expectations grew, until she felt secure in calling you her ‘boyfriend’, at least to herself. Then, when you decided to move on to someone else, that relationship was destroyed, and she was hurt.

If I understand the situation correctly, because you have rejected her, she is also now shamed in the eyes of her girlfriends. She has been, I believe the word is, ‘dumped’.

Bolding mine. He's not entirely wrong here. Relationships are built on communication, and having a talk about what you expect out of a relationship is a good idea. Because we have conflicting information in the text on how long they dated, it's hard to say if that conversation should have happened. I'm also genuinely confused by Asshole Plot Device's expectations here. He said in chapter 1 that he was dating because he wanted to get married. Now he's dating because he wanted to have fun. That's not to say that these things are mutually exclusive, but the whole, "you were just looking to have fun" isn't exactly what the text said. Perhaps Mr. Ohlman (who is a creeper) should have written an outline and a character study, cos Asshole Plot Device's character is as clear as mud right now.


Andrew: So, from now on, she will always feel ‘rejected’ by me. We will have a broken relationship, not just a non-dating relationship.

Sakal: And that is probably not her first time. She may have given part of her heart to a dozen boys already, and will give it to yet a dozen more.

Andrew: The poor boy at the end...!

Sakal: What?

Andrew: He will have to compete with the memory of all of those others!xxxii

FUCK YOU ASSHOLE PLOT DEVICE! Instead of being sad that he might have hurt a woman that one would assume might at the very least have considered a friend, he's on about the stupid pieces of her heart horseshit. It's all about the penis at the end of the line. Fuck you asshole, and fuck the patriarchy and misogyny that makes people think that fucking HORSESHIT like this is fucking OK.

Thank god that this chapter is over. It wasn't wtf-y so much as it was fucking sad. I want to give Ebil Whore a hug so. fucking. bad, and then sit down Asshole Plot Device and try to deprogram him.

Next time on this clusterfuck: we have a GotHard mention. Hopefully that one will be back to being funny wtf, not just depressing.

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God bless you. If you are Catholic I would say reading that qualifies as an indulgence and lessens your time in purgatory!

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I've never really felt the need to be drunk before.  Wow.

Please stop hurting yourself by reading this.  I'm scared and want it to stop existing.

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Re: the picture. You can just make out the corner of the picnic table there, so apparently that is the beautiful view which one sees from the park. My thoughts on why that was chose: the 'city skyline' was probably meant to be symbolic for the impending doom of Ms Worldly coming to visit. :roll:

'Favorite' quote: "Sakal: Is that why you wanted to sleep with Andrew?". Because you know, lets not have any limits on what we say around strangers, that might be too worldly or something.
Mr Wiseguy Busybody apparently never read Philippians 4:8 "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.". If he had, he probably wouldn't be thinking about the sexual desires of a girl he had just met that same day. That conversation was all sorts of wrong :shakehead:


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@OnceUponATime, I'm reading on my ipad, so all i see there is a bunch of mush. I think you could be right....but it still makes no sense in context.

Nosy Busybody was such an asshole to poor ebil whore. I'd have stomped off angry too, and a lot sooner. He's so condescending and horrible, and has no fucking boundaries. He's also a one dimensional Gary Stu, but that's a different problem entirely.

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What strikes me of these Fundie Manly-Men/Boring-Arseholes is that they don't fucking care for a woman, her feelings, her wellbeing, her personality, her wishes, nope. The only things that matters are:

-is she a good looking young virgin who is going to be a perfect submissive, forever pregnant, homeschooling SAHM?

-is she the right flavour of Christian? 

Check, check, ok she's a good girl let's marry her so I can finally get to have teh sex!

Was I dating an opinionated woman with a personality that can't be ignored, who also happens to want teh sex? ok let's dump her. After all I'm not giving her teh sex because she doesn't really want it, she wants to be loved and it's pretty clear I can love only myself.

Seriously they are self centered, sex nad, adolescent brained Arseholes. And Vaughn Ohlman Is A Creeper and A Pedophilic Pimp. 

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uber frau


Evil Whore sounds better off now that she's broken off w this creep. I doubt she feels rejected, I think she feels liberated.

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This could be habit-forming, reading the latest installment with my first cup of coffee in the morning.  But Destiny, please don't harm yourself in the process!

The double-standard does come shining through, doesn't it:

Sakal: And that is probably not her first time. She may have given part of her heart to a dozen boys already, and will give it to yet a dozen more.

Umm, well Andrew has given pieces of his miniscule heart and brain to Ebil Whore and Ms. Mayden (already forgot her virtuous name).  I am very much for turning this thinking around such as I read in another post on FJ.  An Ivy League college wanted to continue to ban women from a club because they were distracting with their ebil, alluring ways.  The poster rephrased it that they wanted to ban women from the club because it was populated with potential rapists.  My double-standard detector is now in the "on" position.

Women aren't treated very well in VOIAPP's world, despite the illusion of being on a pedestal.  My daughter and I feel like whipping his creepy ass.   [Adding a little something to my coffee...]

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2 hours ago, CTRLZero said:

Women aren't treated very well in VOIAPP's world, despite the illusion of being on a pedestal.  My daughter and I feel like whipping his creepy ass.   [Adding a little something to my coffee...]

THIS THIS THIS OMFG THIS! Mr. Ohlman (who is a creeper) goes on and on about how much he respects and loves women and wants to protect them but then he treats them like this. It's so fucking sad.

I think I might hate Vaughn Ohlman (who is a creeper) more than I hate GotHard. Who ever knew that would be a thing?

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I have three comments.

  1. as one who would be considered an evil whore back in the day she left out some reasons for having a BF:. Someone to pay for stuff snd drive you places...and sex.
  2. if women aren't supposed to enjoy sex why is the clitoris the only organ in the human body with no purpose other than sexual pleasure?  I know men enjoy their orgasms but their junk serves for reproduction and elimination.  So if they believe God is unerring and that he designed the human body (and they believe both of those things) why would he give us something strictly for sexual pleasure if we weren't meant to enjoy it?  I'm not being snarky, I want one of these fuckers to answer that question.  
  3. i have dated and had sex with a fair number of guys back when I was single ...and those categories are not entirely overlapping...it's a vein diagram.  A few I remember fondly.  A couple I remember with some animus...most are filed in the neutral "oh him" part of my brain.  And yes, some I don't rememebr at all because of recklessness combined with recreational substances resulting in some very bad decision making during a short period of my life.  Fully aware I was lucky not smart that there were no repercussions from that.

and i haven't spent my life longing for them nor are any walking around with pieces of my anything.  And I've been married twice both of them got my full heart and commitment during while together.

fuck this guy and his untenable expectations and soul crushing views on relationships and women.




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