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New Diet Idea


crazydaffodil

936 views

I've come up with a great new diet that allows you to lose weight without reducing the amount of food you consume or even having to exercise.  Eat all the garbage, sugary food you want and sit on the couch all day!  You'll never have to worry about stepping on the scale again and worrying about how high or how low the numbers might read!

It's all quite simple.  Your weight is determined by the amount of force being pulled to the earth by gravitational pull.  Rather than focusing on the force, let's focus on the gravitational pull!  Just send us $99.99 and we'll send you this complete set of restraining belts to hold you onto your furniture so that you don't drift away!!!  Call now and we'll send you a second set for just the price of shipping and handling!!!

images.jpg.2bdd1b626c46a2096bd590ed21b29

(Bolts and tools for securing furniture to the floor not included.  Degrees of success may vary.)

Just sayin...!

 

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OnceUponATime

Posted

I think you have been watching too many infomercials.

  • Upvote 4
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  • Posts

    • Pancakes@Tiffany's

      Posted

      Edith, Evangeline, Elaine, Ethel, Evonne, Enola, Esme, Elmira, Eileen, and Eudora. Ethan, Emanuel, Edward, Everett, Easton, Errol, Earnest, Erasmus, Ezekiel, and Ellis. 

      I’d add Ebony to the list, but the Kellers really can’t go with that one unless they actually adopt.

    • noseybutt

      Posted (edited)

      33 minutes ago, hoipolloi said:

      Well, we know what Mike said when James & Shoshanna married in 2004 & he seemed to think James was great then. Typically, neither Mike nor Debi has ever acknowledged Shoshanna's or Gabe's divorces, although they have been backpedaling on some of their hardline stuff in recent NGJ articles.

      Shoshanna's IG reel is so garbled it's hard to understand but she seems to be saying that, essentially, her divorce was good because she wanted it. This comports with the primary rule of the Pearls' teachings: Do as we say and not as we do.

      Re: Jeremiah's engagement. Not surprising and also not surprising that Shoshanna seems to have memory-holed all of her advice about not getting married too young.

      Shoshannaonyoungmarriagein2022..thumb.png.1d2cc6255fe1839a3685bb51a4800caa.png

      Jeremiah's cousin, Shalom Brand's oldest, Janelle, got married at 17 in 2022. It's what these people do. 


      Whoa. Since spouses now have rights, I give it 6 months to a year for a public change in the Pearl's divorce theology. 


       

      Edited by noseybutt
    • Marmion

      Posted

      18 hours ago, MariaariaM said:

      Curious foreigner here: is normal in the US to spell out 2024, 5:30, and May but use numerals for the 23rd day OF May? My Dutch teacher would have had a red pen ball.

       

      Yes it is actually .  Though there are some difference in the order in which dates are written , depending upon whether it's American or British English . 

       

      Spoiler

       

       

    • hoipolloi

      Posted (edited)

      3 hours ago, noseybutt said:

      we don't know, really, what opinion her parents had of it. I mean, we know that they are stridently anti-divorce in general terms BUT they are so two-faced that I wouldn't necessarily conclude they were anti-divorce in her situation. IOW, it's hard to know if she was going against her parents wishes or abiding by it.

      Well, we know what Mike said when James & Shoshanna married in 2004 & he seemed to think James was great then. Typically, neither Mike nor Debi has ever acknowledged Shoshanna's or Gabe's divorces, although they have been backpedaling on some of their hardline stuff in recent NGJ articles.

      Shoshanna's IG reel is so garbled it's hard to understand but she seems to be saying that, essentially, her divorce was good because she wanted it. This comports with the primary rule of the Pearls' teachings: Do as we say and not as we do.

      Re: Jeremiah's engagement. Not surprising -- and also not surprising that Shoshanna seems to have memory-holed all of her advice about not getting married too young.

      Shoshannaonyoungmarriagein2022..thumb.png.1d2cc6255fe1839a3685bb51a4800caa.png

      Jeremiah's cousin, Shalom Brand's oldest, Janelle, got married at 17 in 2022. It's what these people do. 

      Edited by hoipolloi
      • WTF 1
      • Thank You 1
    • Marmion

      Posted (edited)

      On 3/25/2024 at 12:29 PM, Cults-r-us said:

      I accidentally deleted my pic. Does anyone know what skirts-wearing fundie sect wears round, doily-ish head coverings? We saw them at a dinosaur museum. The girls had on white ones (assume single)  and the girl with kids had black, so I assume she's married

       

      Those have become rather generic among various head covering wearing Christian sects .  I have come to most commonly associate this style of headwear with the Beachy Amish-Mennonites I had played volleyball with several years ago .  I am still Facebook friends with one of the young women I'd met there , whom has since left the church . For reference,  here is a picture of one of them playing along side me .    

       

      image.png.e921cc84f7965e890d8c2c5e132ddbd2.png

      Edited by Marmion


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