Three astronauts crash down on a planet and emerge from their capsule to a world of clean air, blue skies, beautiful beaches and clear, glistening water. The environment appears glorious, as if never destroyed by human activity. As the three men gather themselves and brace for life on this new world, they notice that they are very alone. They look around and see no other people or movement of any kind except for the soft waves trickling onto the sandy beach where their capsule washed up.
Did you know that it is a law, at least in the United States, that before you may turn your vehicle right onto another street while at a red light, you must actually stop first? I don't mean a "California Roll," where you come to an almost complete stop as you edge your way forward before gunning it. I mean an actual stop! As in no movement at all!
When did this happen and why doesn't anyone follow this law? Oh wait, that's why the light is RED in the first place, isn't it? Because
What is with ear wax, toe jam and belly button lint? Are there any more worthless things our bodies could create? You can't even collect the stuff and make something good from it. Who wants to buy this collection of grungy ear wax I've been saving since 1978??? It's not like you can decorate it and hang it on your wall. It doesn't even have an appealing color to any of it. I mean, imagine if you wiped something out of your ear that was a bright neon blue. That would at least be something
What if... one day you woke up and everything was completely opposite of what you knew your entire life? Left was right, black was white, up was down... Imagine eyes in the back of your head, which is of course what you use to walk with! Or how about Monday as the last day of a 5-day weekend! The Earth rotates the other way and the sun rises in the west and sets in the east, all at night of course. It could be so maddening that attempts to end your life would only make you live forever!!!
We should all be more like NFL football players. Why do I say that? Because every time they execute a play, like they are paid handsomely to do, they celebrate like the clock just struck midnight on New Year's Eve! They point, they strut, the high five, and they dance. Boy do they dance! They must think those tight uniform pants showing off all 300 pounds of their junk in the trunk maes them somehow adorable.
But wait, perhaps this somehow gets you started on a second career. Take fo
Seems to be a lot of mention of male reproductive organs lately, both here and in the Republican debates. Does size really matter? Does even having such a slab of muscle mean anything?
Sure, this site is heavily visited and used by women to express thoughts and ideas. But if a male steps in and says something that goes against the grain, instead of being called out on it, as would be done with a female user, he gets raked over the coals. It's as if the women of the Amazons have declared
Have you ever noticed how when you were really young, like kindergarten age, there were sooooo many rules? You can't do this and you can't touch that. New rules kept coming up all the time because some kid would do something totally unexpected. But then as we got older, the rules were a little more lax and we were able to get away with some stuff, just because we were wiser to how to get away with stuff, even if we knew it was wrong.
Then we become adults and most of those rules are alre