Dillards 45: The Grift Goes On

[Rachel333]

Heifer is a good organization. Years ago FJ as a community did a holiday donation to them, which I thought was nice, but since then money + FJ has obviously been a tricky issue. Anyway, both Heifer and Doctors Without Borders are two charities that I think do a really great job and are responsible with what they do.

13 hours ago, laPapessaGiovanna said:

A little reminder of the guidelines: do not flounce repeatedly.

So does that mean we get one free flounce but that's it? 

[SeekingAdventure]

As for the comment with the diamond ring, I do remember Jill saying it. I think she said something in the way she would leave her ring in the US (with Cathy?) for savekeeping, because she'd be worried somebody would try to cut off her finger just to get the ring. I do not remember the words exactly, but it was the episode before they went back, when they had the dinner, as a previous poster already pointed out.

Obviously, the fear of people cutting of fingers is a bit.. well, over the top for my taste, but then again, I did not wear any jewellery etc while I was travelling in South America, because for one, I did not need it, and also I wanted to blend in a bit more, and didn't want to advertise (more than my blending white skin would already do) that I was European and therefor most likely more wealthy than most of them.

But generally, when people shake their heads about me travelling through SA for a extended time, because, oh shock, a girl - all by herself - how did I not get myself killed? I just tell them it is pretty much just using your brains. Don't take extended walks on the beach after sunset, don't go through deserted alleys, take safe cabs, be cautious and aware - but don't overdue it and expect everybody who looks at you for more than 2 seconds as someone who wants to rape, rob or murder you. Most people were just so genuinely nice and just curious what made me come there and I really enjoyed mixing with locals, and, you know, not talk about Jesus and stuff...

 

The second comment about rape, I do not recall, but I also only watch very halfheartedly while doing other things, so I might have missed it. I only recall the diamond ring thing, because I thought it was somewhat smart to just leave it behind.

[Sky with diamonds]

Regarding the ring. Is it just me who thought it was odd that Jill left the ring with with Derick's mother instead of Michelle? 

[SeekingAdventure]

maybe because Momma Cathy always takes such good care of her baby, she'd also take good care of jewellery?

[Alisamer]

41 minutes ago, Sky with diamonds said:

Regarding the ring. Is it just me who thought it was odd that Jill left the ring with with Derick's mother instead of Michelle? 

Derick bought the ring, and it's a symbol of JimBob transferring his authority over Jillymuffin to her new keeper husband, so it kind of makes sense to leave it with his mom. I think the general etiquette rule is that if an engagement is broken the ring goes back to the guy. Though my sister had a friend who did not follow that rule, and I think was trying to get enough diamonds for a tennis bracelet as often as she was engaged. 

[MoonFace]

10 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

Derick bought the ring, and it's a symbol of JimBob transferring his authority over Jillymuffin to her new keeper husband, so it kind of makes sense to leave it with his mom. I think the general etiquette rule is that if an engagement is broken the ring goes back to the guy. Though my sister had a friend who did not follow that rule, and I think was trying to get enough diamonds for a tennis bracelet as often as she was engaged. 

It used to be that if the guy broke the engagement the woman kept the ring but if she broke the engagement she should give it back.   But now it depends on state laws - but pretty much it should be given back as it was a 'conditional gift'.    

 

 

[Petrel]

1 hour ago, SeekingAdventure said:

As for the comment with the diamond ring, I do remember Jill saying it. I think she said something in the way she would leave her ring in the US (with Cathy?) for savekeeping, because she'd be worried somebody would try to cut off her finger just to get the ring. 

There is a short story about that by someone famous (Agatha Christie?) so I’d think she’d read that except I’ve never heard of them reading. 

[Sky with diamonds]

1 hour ago, Alisamer said:

Derick bought the ring, and it's a symbol of JimBob transferring his authority over Jillymuffin to her new keeper husband, so it kind of makes sense to leave it with his mom. I think the general etiquette rule is that if an engagement is broken the ring goes back to the guy. Though my sister had a friend who did not follow that rule, and I think was trying to get enough diamonds for a tennis bracelet as often as she was engaged. 

You could be right. It surprised me she didn't leave it with her parents since Jill was the golden child. 

I think putting the ring in a safety deposit box is too much common sense for Jill though. 

[Ilovebrownies]

Pretty sure Jill talked about getting her finger cut off at least twice because when I heard it on the show before their return I remember thinking oh here we go again.  Also I remember her implying the possibility of being raped and murdered.  And every single family member stating she was living in an extremely dangerous place and how worried they were if they didn't hear from her.

[Sky with diamonds]

This probably has been covered before, but I have to ask was she overdramatizing that a little? 

If this has been covered before, please feel to ignore this post. 

[VelociRapture]

8 minutes ago, Sky with diamonds said:

This probably has been covered before, but I have to ask was she overdramatizing that a little? 

If this has been covered before, please feel to ignore this post. 

She likely was, to an extent. They appear to have been living in a kind of gated community with armed guards. Most of us very much doubt that they personally experienced serious danger or violence while there. 

That said, there was violence in the area and one of the local men they were friendly with was murdered by a gang in the spring of this year. His murder does seem to have shaken them up, but wouldn’t explain why Jill stated what she did or why any of them described the level of danger they did. 

Personally, I think it’s pretty likely they heard stories about the dangers from other missionaries and/or from the locals while they were there. That, the distance from their families, being in an unfamiliar place, the fact that they had a small child, and the fact that Jill was pregnant during the last portion of their mission may have caused Jill to feel a higher level of fear than may have been necessary. 

[Petrel]

Why would they cut her finger off?  She obviously is capable of removing the ring if she left it at home, why wouldn’t robbers just make her take it off? Seems unnecessarily complicated to go out of one’s way to cut off fingers. 

[JillyO]

19 minutes ago, Petrel said:

Why would they cut her finger off?  She obviously is capable of removing the ring if she left it at home, why wouldn’t robbers just make her take it off? Seems unnecessarily complicated to go out of one’s way to cut off fingers. 

Yes, but "I'm worried someone might steal my ring" does not make it sound half as dramatic as "someone might cut off my finger just to get at the ring," now does it?

[Sky with diamonds]

1 hour ago, VelociRapture said:

She likely was, to an extent. They appear to have been living in a kind of gated community with armed guards. Most of us very much doubt that they personally experienced serious danger or violence while there. 

That said, there was violence in the area and one of the local men they were friendly with was murdered by a gang in the spring of this year. His murder does seem to have shaken them up, but wouldn’t explain why Jill stated what she did or why any of them described the level of danger they did. 

Personally, I think it’s pretty likely they heard stories about the dangers from other missionaries and/or from the locals while they were there. That, the distance from their families, being in an unfamiliar place, the fact that they had a small child, and the fact that Jill was pregnant during the last portion of their mission may have caused Jill to feel a higher level of fear than may have been necessary. 

Thanks for explaining. I understand her a little more now, and feel bad for and Israel while they were there. I don't think much of Derick for having her there with a small child and while pregnant. His selfishness really knows no bounds, IMO.

[HarryPotterFan]

4 hours ago, Alisamer said:

Derick bought the ring, and it's a symbol of JimBob transferring his authority over Jillymuffin to her new keeper husband, so it kind of makes sense to leave it with his mom. I think the general etiquette rule is that if an engagement is broken the ring goes back to the guy. Though my sister had a friend who did not follow that rule, and I think was trying to get enough diamonds for a tennis bracelet as often as she was engaged. 

Alternatively, if the woman is an absolute asshole with no soul she could try and keep the ring to pretend the engagement is still on and to avoid having to explain to everyone that she cheated on her fiancé. Not that that happened to anyone I know. 

[Shadoewolf]

The Dillards are pimping Cross Church and their "Blessing Baskets" for the poor. Except you don't get the food until after you sit through one of their ridiculous sermons. Way to prey on needy people Dillards! Recruiting numbers at the church must be awfully low. 

Image added, sorry about sizing!

[llg1234]

 

[bananabread]

Attempt at Jessa-style cute kids post to distract from D-Wreck's antics? Desperately trying to rehabilitate the Duggar brand? Just lightheartedly documenting the joys of Israel's toddler years? The world may never know.

[bananabread]

8 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

The Dillards are pimping Cross Church and their "Blessing Baskets" for the poor. Except you don't get the food until after you sit through one of their ridiculous sermons.

Wait, seriously?!! That's awful. I've never even heard of a church that did "charity" that way. Reminds me of a timeshare sales pitch...sure you can have snacks and a cheap vacation, but only if you sit though a 2-hour presentation about how to waste your money.

Edit: Wait, how did I end up in the Jinger thread??? My mistake! Sorry!!

[Imagine20]

I'd think cutting off someone's finger would be pretty messy and lead to finding the culprit pretty quickly. If someone was going to shed blood to get a ring, they'd kill for it.

As for engagement rings, I admit I kept mine after a failed engagement...but he made a deal and I gave him an iPod mini that came free with my computer in exchange for it. A few years later, I sold it for $5,000. So, someone made a bad deal.

[HarryPotterFan]

Am I the only one wondering why she didn't try washing his hair with shampoo? Why dish soap? Are males not allowed to use shampoo in that house? 

[Shadoewolf]

Dawn dish soap has a de-greaser in it, it takes out a lot of things and is relatively gentle.

[Shadoewolf]

@bananabread I did too somehow but just moved it to the Dillard thread.

[Sky with diamonds]

20 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

The Dillards are pimping Cross Church and their "Blessing Baskets" for the poor. Except you don't get the food until after you sit through one of their ridiculous sermons. Way to prey on needy people Dillards! Recruiting numbers at the church must be awfully low. 

Ugh, that's terrible. Why not help people first and foremost because there's a need instead? Or is that too sensible of a thought process?

22 minutes ago, bananabread said:

Attempt at Jessa-style cute kids post to distract from D-Wreck's antics? Desperately trying to rehabilitate the Duggar brand? Just lightheartedly documenting the joys of Israel's toddler years? The world may never know.

All of the above, methinks. Especially the first two. 

[HarryPotterFan]

25 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

Dawn dish soap has a de-greaser in it, it takes out a lot of things and is relatively gentle.

Thanks! I was just imagining an unkempt Derick insisting that shampoo and caring about your appearance is for girls.