Joy and Austin 16: Touring the Texas Rodeo

[VineHeart137]

2 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Make it the middle name, I'm hesitant to say this because I did love Chester Bennington voice and enjoyed Linkin Park alot, but in elementary school we had a kid named Chester and kids started calling him Chester the Molester. It was relentless, to the point the poor guy finally dropped out in 10th grade. :( I caution young people, frequently, to think of how horrible school children are when you name your child, don't make it easy for them to get tormented in school.

We considered Elliot for baby #1 if she had been a boy, and when we mentioned it to my brother-in-law he made a face and was like "You can't name him that, the kids at school will call him Smelliot!" The thought had literally never occurred to us. Kids can be brutal in ways adults might not even imagine.

Funny enough, my husband's name actually rhymes with Chester but as far as I know he has never gotten the "Molester" nickname.

[louisa05]

I think Bennington would actually be a pretty cool name. Ben as a nickname.

There’s a town named Bennington near here. That’s another thing people should really consider.

I know too many people who have kids where the first and last names start with the same syllable. Like Jenny Jensen or Bryan Bryson. I can’t even with that.

[MayMay1123]

My first child was almost named Angelica, I'm happy I didn't go with it because within a short time "The Rugrats" became very popular LOL no one I knew had her name in 1986, but it became super used in the next few years. the next two were boys so I never did get to use my next favorite for a girl, Mallory Rose, I've never met anyone with that name. 

[SorenaJ]

If I had a boy, he'd be either Thomas, Oscar, David or William 

A girl would be Alma, Luna, Gaia or Cosima

I'd probably include a gender neutral name in their name as well, I quite like Jessie, Hartley, Hayden, Rowan, Emery, Marlowe, Rory, Emerson, Shay, Sol, Remy, Marley, Charlie, or Storm. 

20 minutes ago, neurogirl said:

Anyway, besides our inherent name differences, my fiance has a hard rule about "noun names." No places, no flowers/animals, no virtues. But then he loves the name Grace? He and his mom both would love us to name a child Grace and I love it too...but it rhymes with fiances last name. I told them we could name her Grace Mylastname. Future MIL's (who is a wonderful woman in other regards) eyes bugged out of her head but she didn't say anything. Fiance is a great guy but he's having trouble with that one. I think it would actually be beautiful with my last name, and since fiance has no issue with me keeping my name, I'll keep trying to persuade him  

Do keep trying neurogirl! There is no reason at all why the father's surname should be default. Could you merge your surnames, or give the baby both, with  a hyphen?

[neurogirl]

@SorenaJ thank you! Yes we've talked about hyphenating, both for our names and any future children, but my last name is also unique (doesn't make phonetic sense in English unique) so realistically it would probably be dropped in all but legal documents. And the genealogist in me wonders what the next generation does with hyphens. It is an option though! I'm so excited for my wedding and marriage- except when I think about the whole last name business!

[Antipatriarch]

1 hour ago, 2manyKidzzz said:

I like to say that you have to consider that your child will, when meeting people, shake their hand and look at them and say “Hi, I am blah blah blah”. 

 

1 hour ago, samurai_sarah said:

I agree with you, but there are unforeseen pitfalls. My friends' and my jaw dropped, when a lady from France introduced herself as "Fanny". Perfectly acceptable name in France, I am told. But in the US it means one thing, and in the UK another. And the meaning in the UK is far more unfortunate than in the US. "Fanny" in the UK, refers to female genitals.

A friend of mine said he has to be careful to introduce himself as "Randall" when in Europe. Looking someone in the eye, shaking their hand, and saying, "Hi, I'm Randy!" doesn't come across the same way as it does in the U.S. 

[Georgiana]

11 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

 

A friend of mine said he has to be careful to introduce himself as "Randall" when in Europe. Looking someone in the eye, shaking their hand, and saying, "Hi, I'm Randy!" doesn't come across the same way as it does in the U.S. 

My coworker goes by Randy. Randy Cox. 

(Not kidding.)

[libgirl2]

45 minutes ago, VineHeart137 said:

We considered Elliot for baby #1 if she had been a boy, and when we mentioned it to my brother-in-law he made a face and was like "You can't name him that, the kids at school will call him Smelliot!" The thought had literally never occurred to us. Kids can be brutal in ways adults might not even imagine.

Funny enough, my husband's name actually rhymes with Chester but as far as I know he has never gotten the "Molester" nickname.

My cat is named Elliot and we call him Smelliot. 

[VelociRapture]

9 minutes ago, neurogirl said:

@SorenaJ thank you! Yes we've talked about hyphenating, both for our names and any future children, but my last name is also unique (doesn't make phonetic sense in English unique) so realistically it would probably be dropped in all but legal documents. And the genealogist in me wonders what the next generation does with hyphens. It is an option though! I'm so excited for my wedding and marriage- except when I think about the whole last name business!

Do what you feel is best for you and your family. That’s the only thing that’s really important.

As for picking names, one of he actresses from Grey’s Anatomy had an interesting way of naming her kids. She and her husband had very different naming styles and had trouble agreeing. So they made a bet each time about the sex of the baby. The person who guessed the baby’s sex before the anatomy scan got the reward of picking the baby’s name. 

Or you and fiancé could do some other bet if you’re both competitive. For instance, if you guys run a lot then whoever has the best time at X race gets to pick the baby’s first name and the other picks the middle name. Or whoever wins a pie eating contest chooses the first name. Or whoever carries and pushes out a tiny person gets to pick the first name. 

(Ok... so that last one wasn’t entirely fair... but still! )

[Carm_88]

31 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

 

A friend of mine said he has to be careful to introduce himself as "Randall" when in Europe. Looking someone in the eye, shaking their hand, and saying, "Hi, I'm Randy!" doesn't come across the same way as it does in the U.S. 

Reminds me of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode Tabula Rasa where Spike thinks his name is Randy and that Giles is his father. "You named me Randy Giles? Why not call my Horny Giles or Desperate for a Shag Giles." 

[keen23]

I love the name Astrid. But it's way too easy to get called Ass-Turd.

[JDuggs]

This is a baby naming compromise method. Each parent come up with a list of 5 to  10 or some agreed upon number of names. Each parent chooses their favorite name from their partner’s list. Those two names go into a drawing. It’s definitely a compromise, but it seems fair. I also think something similar would be nice in an open adoption situation. Give the birth mom a list of five names and ask her to choose the name.

[JesSky03]

Thankfully my husband and I have a relatively easy time agreeing on names. We're having a boy and decided on Gabriel(Gabe). That name has actually been on our hypothetical list for almost 8 years and we both still love it. Other boy names on the list include Eli (though with how popular Elijah has become I'm rethinking it) and Gideon. A co-worker of mine has a son named Levi and that name has really grown on me- maybe I'll replace Eli with Levi since they sound so similar! If we would be having a girl her name would be Edith. We also liked Hannah. Girl names were harder for us though because my husband tends to lean towards cutesy names like Claire or Chloe...nice names but not my cup of tea. I did cave on one and said I would consider the name Myla. 

My least favorite name that I've heard of is from a girl I went to school with who named her son Diesel....like the gasoline. I've known several people who have named their dogs Diesel and I just have a hard time accepting it as a name for a human. 

I'm also predicating Joy has a boy with a name like Hunter or Connor. 

[VelociRapture]

21 minutes ago, JDuggs said:

This is a baby naming compromise method. Each parent come up with a list of 5 to  10 or some agreed upon number of names. Each parent chooses their favorite name from their partner’s list. Those two names go into a drawing. It’s definitely a compromise, but it seems fair. I also think something similar would be nice in an open adoption situation. Give the birth mom a list of five names and ask her to choose the name.

Or you could also ask the birth mom to choose a middle name. Either way, it’s a really sweet idea to let the birth mom be involved (if it’s possible and all parties are comfortable and agreeable with the idea.)

I do like the compromise method you mentioned. Husband and I would have done that, but our issue was him knowing the names he didn’t like and not knowing what names he did like. we agreed on daughter’s name by doing the following:

- I suggested a ton of names, all of which he shot down. I finally mention one he didn’t immediately dislike. He took a few weeks to think about it.

- Without warning, he randomly mentioned a different version of the name I suggested. He flipped the middle and first names and chose a different version of the middle name I suggested. So, say I had suggested the name Elise Catherine - he countered with Katherine Elise*. 

- I took some time to think it over. I checked my family tree and it turned out the first name he picked was the middle name of my dad’s favorite Aunt, her sister, and her mother (who helped raise him.) Ultimately, I agreed because it’s a nice name and we both liked the family connections. 

- While pregnant with my daughter, we debated what spelling to use for her middle name. Right around the sudden end of my pregnancy, we agreed on the German spelling rather than the typical spelling you see in the states and U.K.

And that’s how we picked her name, which we both adore.  

* Not my daughter’s actual name by the way. That was just to illustrate. Lol!

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

33 minutes ago, JDuggs said:

This is a baby naming compromise method. Each parent come up with a list of 5 to  10 or some agreed upon number of names. Each parent chooses their favorite name from their partner’s list. Those two names go into a drawing. It’s definitely a compromise, but it seems fair. I also think something similar would be nice in an open adoption situation. Give the birth mom a list of five names and ask her to choose the name.

We both had lists, we went through each others crossed off names that were a NO and then made the list with the names that remained. I was kind of a bitch with #2 I crossed off ALL his girl names and said start over because these are awful, he never did come close to anything I would consider and there was only one named that I liked that he did that didn't have a close family member or friend with that name or a child with that name so, thankfully we only had one girl, DH is so white man basic with this name choices.

23 minutes ago, JesSky03 said:

Thankfully my husband and I have a relatively easy time agreeing on names. We're having a boy and decided on Gabriel(Gabe). That name has actually been on our hypothetical list for almost 8 years and we both still love it. Other boy names on the list include Eli (though with how popular Elijah has become I'm rethinking it) and Gideon. A co-worker of mine has a son named Levi and that name has really grown on me- maybe I'll replace Eli with Levi since they sound so similar!

This is funny, when I had DS my brother HATED his name (which happens to be Elijah) so he called/calls him Levi, just to be an asshole.

[JDuggs]

I love looking at the Social Security baby name lists. For the uncreative (meaning men) it’s a great place to start to think about names that you’ve never considered before. And it’s a real list of names that people are actually using, not just some website saying these names are trendy.

[SorenaJ]

@VelociRaptureI'd say whoever pushes the tiny human out should at least have a fair amount of say. I have heard of version where the parent whose surname is not the baby's surname decides on the first name. 

@neurogirlIn terms of the next generation and hyphens: In my home country it is the norm (at least among my generation) to have two surnames. Not the law, but the norm. When two people, who both have two surnames, have a baby, they would often each choose one of their surnames, so that the baby would still have two. They would often choose the most unique surname, so say a couple had surnames (completely randomly picked from mongabay) Johnson Whitley and Elmore Smith, the baby would be Whitley Elmore. Sometimes, the parents, if they got married, would ditch the very common surname, and both be Whitley Elmore. There are no rules, but this is how it often goes. The very common surnames get weeded out, and it would be very unusual for a baby to only have one surname. They normally choose one which they use in day to day life, just whichever one they prefer. 

Another reason why I don't think the father's surname should be default: What if the father has the most common and dull surname ever, say he is Smith or Brown, but the mother has a lovely very unusual surname. It would be such a shame to miss out on that surname, just because it has to be the father's surname.  

[melon]

My oldest son just had a birthday,recently.November 5.I asked if he knew who Guy Fawkes was.He did not.I remember my father and grandmother saying"Remember,Remember the 5th of November.I deliberately chose names for my sons that were not popular ,but not rare or unheard of.It tried to be keep in mind how it sounded when combined with our last name.I did not have any girls but love the name Carrie,but when combined with our last name,it sounds like a name for a suitcase or a moving service.And when my sons dated girls,my opinions of certain names also changed.

[justoneoftwo]

For us girl names are super hard.  We want traditional, but not too common.  Ideally with lots of nickname options to the kid gets a choice.  And ideally with a gender neutral nickname option.  Haven't found a girls name yet that is perfect.  (LO is a boy, his name was super easy, but if we have a girl later no idea!)

[karen77]

My BIL and SIL essentially named their daughter Jocelyn, but it's spelled so you can't pronounce it that way unless you are going in with the mindset of how people speshul snowflake spell names these days. It's not even phonetic and drives me batty.  She's adorable, but I just have a hard time with it all because of her name.. Gonna be interesting when she starts attending school.

[Eternalbluepearl]

8 minutes ago, karen77 said:

My BIL and SIL essentially named their daughter Jocelyn, but it's spelled so you can't pronounce it that way unless you are going in with the mindset of how people speshul snowflake spell names these days. 

Jocelyn is a name I really like. I'm so intrigued by this creative spelling though, lol! 

[VelociRapture]

19 minutes ago, justoneoftwo said:

For us girl names are super hard.  We want traditional, but not too common.  Ideally with lots of nickname options to the kid gets a choice.  And ideally with a gender neutral nickname option.  Haven't found a girls name yet that is perfect.  (LO is a boy, his name was super easy, but if we have a girl later no idea!)

Here are a few ideas!

Lorelai - Lori, Rory (gender neutral?), Lora, Lola

Alexandra/Alexandria - Alex (gender neutral), Al (kinda gender neutral?), Alexa, Allie, Lex (kinda gender neutral?), Lexie, Sandy, Sandra, Andy (gender neutral), Andrea

Veronica - Ron (kinda gender neutral?), Ronnie (kinda gender neutral?), Vera, Nic (kinda gender neutral?), Nicki

Josephine/Josephina - Joe (kinda gender neutral?), Jo (kinda gender neutral?), Joey (kinda gender neutral?), Josie

Christina - Chris (kinda gender neutral?), Tina, Chrissy, Christie 

Francesca/Frances - Fran, Frankie (kinda gender neutral?), Frannie

Leona/Leonora - Lee (gender neutral), Leo (kinda gender neutral), Nora, Lennie (kinda gender neutral?), Lora, Lea

Matilda - Matt (kinda gender neutral?), Mattie, Tilda, Tilly/Tillie

Jessica - Jess (gender neutral), Jessie (gender neutral)

Olympia - Pia, Ollie (gender neutral), Lolly (gender neutral)

Abigail - Abby, Abbie, Abbey, Gale (kinda gender neutral?), Gail

Patricia - Pat (gender neutral), Pattie, Patty, Tricia, Patsy (gender neutral?)

Victoria - Tori, Vicki/Vicky, Vic (gender neutral)

Samantha - Sam (gender neutral), Sammy

Theodora - Dora, Thea, Teddy (gender neutral), Doris, Theo

Philippa - Pippa, Pip (gender neutral), Philly/Phillie, Pippy/Pippi, Phil (gender neutral?)

Not sure if those names are really what you’re looking for, but I tried. 

(I’m also coming at this from a US perspective, so apologies if these don’t suit your cultural norms or your idea of traditional.  )

[justoneoftwo]

7 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

Here are a few ideas!

Quote

 

Lorelai - Lori, Rory (gender neutral?), Lora, Lola

Alexandra/Alexandria - Alex (gender neutral), Al (kinda gender neutral?), Alexa, Allie, Lex (kinda gender neutral?), Lexie, Sandy, Sandra, Andy (gender neutral), Andrea

Veronica - Ron (kinda gender neutral?), Ronnie (kinda gender neutral?), Vera, Nic (kinda gender neutral?), Nicki

Josephine/Josephina - Joe (kinda gender neutral?), Jo (kinda gender neutral?), Joey (kinda gender neutral?), Josie

Christina - Chris (kinda gender neutral?), Tina, Chrissy, Christie 

Francesca/Frances - Fran, Frankie (kinda gender neutral?), Frannie

Leona/Leonora - Lee (gender neutral), Leo (kinda gender neutral), Nora, Lennie (kinda gender neutral?), Lora, Lea

Matilda - Matt (kinda gender neutral?), Mattie, Tilda, Tilly/Tillie

Jessica - Jess (gender neutral), Jessie (gender neutral)

Olympia - Pia, Ollie (gender neutral), Lolly (gender neutral)

Abigail - Abby, Abbie, Abbey, Gale (kinda gender neutral?), Gail

Patricia - Pat (gender neutral), Pattie, Patty, Tricia, Patsy (gender neutral?)

Victoria - Tori, Vicki/Vicky, Vic (gender neutral)

Samantha - Sam (gender neutral), Sammy

Theodora - Dora, Thea, Teddy (gender neutral), Doris, Theo

Philippa - Pippa, Pip (gender neutral), Philly/Phillie, Pippy/Pippi, Phil (gender neutral?)

 

Quote

 

Not sure if those names are really what you’re looking for, but I tried. 

(I’m also coming at this from a US perspective, so apologies if these don’t suit your cultural norms or your idea of traditional.  )

Those are some great options actually!  Thanks.  

One is the female version of LO's so that one is out, but there are great options and also great nicknames I hadn't thought of.  They are exactly the tone we were looking for (also from the US)Thanks so much!

[sta_sha]

1 hour ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

We both had lists, we went through each others crossed off names that were a NO and then made the list with the names that remained.

This is how we chose names for our boys. From the list I picked one name and he picked the other. We're using my dad's and his dad's names for middle names. We also have a back up first name in case one doesn't seem right when the boys are born next week. Boys names were waaay harder to come up with than girls names!

[Antipatriarch]

If you haven't seen it, there's a great tool at Baby Name Wizard that shows the popularity of a name over time. They also have a blog where they talk about baby name trends. I find it interesting!