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Dillards 44: Still Pretending to Missionary to College Students


Coconut Flan

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3 hours ago, Lurky said:

It's like the whole "Ban the burka because male criminals are using them to pretend to be women"/waves of Mexican immigrants committing abhorrent sex crimes, so there should be a border wall etc etc.

Whenever I hear these hysterical reactions I always think of women in the Algerian Revolution who flipped that script completely, sometimes taking off their veils and dressing as secular Western women to hide their bombs, etc, more effectively. We've collectively forgotten all the historical lessons learned (not even that long ago!) about these kind of ridiculous stereotypes. Yup, it's super helpful to assume how likely someone is to commit violence based on the way they look!

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Jill makes it so hard to feel sorry for her at times. Ugh. 

3 hours ago, JillyO said:

If any of these bigoted assholes were to see a trans man in the ladies' room - which they supposedly want him to use - they would absolutely FREAK.

But, as others have said before, this isn't about the use of bathrooms at all. It's about trans people's right to exist in public spaces.

Jrod comes to my mind. Didn't she freak out and put it on her blog? 

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I have been MIA due to being way behind on NaNoWriMo, but I just saw Jill's most recent Instagram post and I just had to stop in to express my disgust. 

I am disgusted.

Jill, your husband sucks. I'm not sure about you, because as a fundie woman you kind of have to go along for the ride whether you like it or not. But it still sucks. Please stop.

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Ugh, growing up in NW Arkansas, where there are a lot of immigrants from Latin American countries, I heard a lot of horrible racism against Latinos, and people do love to use the few who have committed crimes to say that none of them should be allowed to enter. Those crimes have happened, but I'd like to think that most reasonable people can realize that while crimes like that do exist, there is absolutely no group of people who are completely non-violent and a tiny minority of criminals isn't enough to justify discrimination.

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3 hours ago, JillyO said:

If any of these bigoted assholes were to see a trans man in the ladies' room - which they supposedly want him to use - they would absolutely FREAK.

These pro-bathroom bill people really have zero familiarity with trans people and so have this ridiculous caricature of all trans women looking like The Rock squeezed into a too small minidress and tripping over high heels. And they picture trans men as Anna Kendrick in painted on stubble and a baseball cap. They don't understand that many trans people adhere more traditionally to the secondary sex characteristics of their gender identities than cis gender people. And yes, they would absolutely freak if they saw most trans men in women's bathrooms.

Also, and this isn't talked about enough, how on earth could these bathroom laws be enforced? I'm a feminine cis gender woman, but am very tall, and have actually been concerned about some Jill Rodrigues-type freaking out about me using the women's bathroom. What's she, or the North Carolina State Senate, think she is going to be able to do? Her Bible-thumping husband corners me in a bathroom and demands to see my genitalia? That'll go over well...

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Just now, nausicaa said:

These pro-bathroom bill people really have zero familiarity with transpeople and so have this ridiculous caricature of all transwomen looking like The Rock squeezed into a too small minidress and tripping over high heels. And they picture transmen as Anna Kendrick in painted on stubble and a baseball cap. They don't understand that many transpeople adhere more traditionally to the secondary sex characteristics of their gender identities than cisgender people. And yes, they would absolutely freak if they saw most transmen in women's bathrooms.

Also, and this isn't talked about enough, how on earth could these bathroom laws be enforced? I'm a feminine cisgender woman, but am very tall, and have actually been concerned about some Jill Rodrigues freaking out about me using the women's bathroom. What's she, or the North Carolina State Senate, think she is going to be able to do? Your Bible-thumping husband corners me in a bathroom and demands to see my genitalia? That'll go over well...

That does happen. Butch women particularly often get questioned when going into the women's bathroom anyway, so this increased media attention hasn't helped that. Or remember this man, who has connections to the Duggars?

I feel like nothing was actually wrong with how bathrooms worked already. Trans women have been using women's bathrooms for ages and few people cared until recently. There was some push from trans groups to get more gender-neutral bathrooms for people who don't feel comfortable in either bathroom (and I strongly support the idea of having more gender-neutral single-stall bathrooms), but the recent bathroom outrage was a result of people on the right looking for a new scapegoat, not from trans people pushing to change things the way that it's often portrayed on the right.

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15 minutes ago, Sky with diamonds said:

Jill makes it so hard to feel sorry for her at times. Ugh. 

Jrod comes to my mind. Didn't she freak out and put it on her blog? 

Oh, she didn't JUST freak out and put it on her blog, she also called the cops on this poor woman!  

Not only that, but in JRod's story, there is NO MENTION of the other person "using the facilities" so to speak.  This woman came in while Jill was in the stall to do her makeup.  JRod was NOT asked to use the restroom with this woman, she was only asked to WASH HER HANDS next to them.  Which she couldn't do.  Despite the fact that she probably WASHES HER HANDS all the time around cis men, such as in the kitchen.  That's NOT a private activity, JRod is just a bigot and a drama queen.

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8 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

JRod is just a bigot and a drama queen.

Most of the time I could easily confuse JRod with a drag queen so there's that.

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10 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

Oh, she didn't JUST freak out and put it on her blog, she also called the cops on this poor woman!  

Not only that, but in JRod's story, there is NO MENTION of the other person "using the facilities" so to speak.  This woman came in while Jill was in the stall to do her makeup.  JRod was NOT asked to use the restroom with this woman, she was only asked to WASH HER HANDS next to them.  Which she couldn't do.  Despite the fact that she probably WASHES HER HANDS all the time around cis men, such as in the kitchen.  That's NOT a private activity, JRod is just a bigot and a drama queen.

That is quite the over reaction by Jrod. Ugh. 

2 minutes ago, AtlanticTug said:

Most of the time I could easily confuse JRod with a drag queen so there's that.

I've seen drag Queen's who looked better than Jrod. :my_angel:

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8 minutes ago, Rachel333 said:

That does happen. Butch women particularly often get questioned when going into the women's bathroom anyway, so this increased media attention hasn't helped that. Or remember this man, who has connections to the Duggars?

Agreed. I took a queer theory class in grad school where we talked about this quite a bit. We read excerpts from Judith/Jack Halberstam's "Female Masculinity", specifically the part about "the bathroom problem." A highly recommended reading if anyone's interested. Anyway, as a traditionally feminine looking and dressing cis woman, I was astounded by the many bathroom stories my classmates had to tell. Stories about butch women being questioned about their sex by other women in the bathroom. Stories about women calling their husbands into the ladies' room because of the sheer presence of a woman who didn't look the way they thought she should look. And we didn't even have anyone identifying as trans in that class (to my knowledge), so these stories are all from people who identified with their assigned sex. I'm sure trans folks have even more horrifying stories to tell.

 

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Just now, JillyO said:

Agreed. I took a queer theory class in grad school where we talked about this quite a bit. We read excerpts from Judith/Jack Halberstam's "Female Masculinity", specifically the part about "the bathroom problem." A highly recommended reading if anyone's interested. Anyway, as a traditionally feminine looking and dressing cis woman, I was astounded by the many bathroom stories my classmates had to tell. Stories about butch women being questioned about their sex by other women in the bathroom. Stories about women calling their husbands into the ladies' room because of the sheer presence of a woman who didn't look the way they thought she should look. And we didn't even have anyone identifying as trans in that class (to my knowledge), so these stories are all from people who identified with their assigned sex. I'm sure trans folks have even more horrifying stories to tell.

 

There was a girl at my high school who has since come out as trans but back then was just presenting as an extremely feminine guy. She used the men's bathroom but I remember hearing male students talking about how they wanted to beat her up. And she wasn't even presenting as female then! There really wasn't any good bathroom option for her back then.

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Like @Rachel333 said, it isn’t that no crimes are committed by *insert group of people here*, it’s that pointing out the rare few and far between cases isn’t really helpful or constructive. In this case, obviously trans individuals commit crimes because it would be a little absurd to assume that just because someone is trans they would never do illegal things.

The problem is this huge assumption from many conservative folks that this will turn into some major epidemic of sexual assault (hint: trans people use bathrooms without incident most of the time, unless we’re talking about harassment/violence against them.) I think it’s harmful to point to a few examples but then still hide behind the “but obviously I accept trans people and think this isn’t the norm at all and they should be allowed to use the bathrooms that match their gender identity!!!!”

I tend to ramble a lot but I guess my point is that when it comes to a situation that disproportionately affects minorities, there isn’t really a point to playing devils advocate when you know that what you’re saying is the .00001% of the group. People from every background commit crimes and I think we are all aware of that. Let’s not fuel the fire of conservative witch hunters. 

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I'm really sorry that I apparently came across as targeting trans women. That's actually why I avoided any specific examples in the first place, but I definitely understand why that's a problem too.

I actually used to consider myself trans (long story that I don't really want to go into here) and I still read a lot of trans blogs and forums. Until about a year ago I also said that there were literally no examples of crimes committed by trans women in bathrooms, but then there were a few examples that came to the attention of the trans community (the voyeurism case in particular, and since there was a case of video voyeurism in my freshman dorm that particularly struck a chord with me) and since then I've stopped saying that and have noticed that a lot of other trans people have as well. I thought, since this seems to be a pretty trans-friendly group who wouldn't take a few examples as a condemnation of trans people in general, that I would point out that it's no longer accurate to say in absolute terms that no such crimes have ever occurred.

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@Rachel333 I was actually agreeing with your comment about Latinos and crime :my_biggrin: 

But you are absolutely right in the sense that some people seem to also go with the “trans people can do no wrong” narrative. It’s a hard line to tow sometimes, I guess! But no need to apologize for voicing your opinion (:

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1 hour ago, DarkAnts said:

Or the comments that God only makes you either male or female. What about the children who are born intersex? 

I saw those too! Their ignorance is awful and the fact that they don't realize it is just sad. They act like those who are transgender or intersexed, or anything not specifically male or female, don't exist.

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1 minute ago, RubyRei said:

@Rachel333 I was actually agreeing with your comment about Latinos and crime :my_biggrin: 

But you are absolutely right in the sense that some people seem to also go with the “trans people can do no wrong” narrative. It’s a hard line to tow sometimes, I guess! But no need to apologize for voicing your opinion (:

Thank you for understanding what I meant!

I actually feel like it's well-meaning cis people who are more likely to go with the "trans people can do no wrong" narrative. Trans people are more likely to know a lot of other trans people and realize that they're just like any other group.

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I started this by saying what I had seen Jazz and her mother say in the interview with Tomi Lahren. Who really was quite respectful I might add. And geez...guys..

I am quite sure that if trans women were assaulting people in restrooms frequently it would be ALL OVER the news. And well it should be to protect children especially. 

Always be aware in public restrooms I tell myself. Big malls...stadiums, etc. 

I also avoid parking garages when alone at the advice of my then policeman cousin. 

Just pay attention. 

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According to my local Planned Parenthood, it's Trans Awareness Week; is Derick going to ramp up the asshole-ness? 

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It probably won't do anything, but I reported Dwreck's latest fundraiser to gofundme for fraud. Since every other "fundraiser" he's done has mostly been for he & his family's personal use, I think all present and future fundraisers should be considered fraud, whether through Cross Church or not. Show us the receipts, grifter! 

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The comments on Jill's post are overwhelmingly negative. This gives me some hope for humanity.

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I can't get over the gall it takes for Derick and Jill to ask their fans, most of whom have less money than they do and whose support is the reason Derick and Jill have money, to donate.

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34 minutes ago, Rachel333 said:

There was a girl at my high school who has since come out as trans but back then was just presenting as an extremely feminine guy. She used the men's bathroom but I remember hearing male students talking about how they wanted to beat her up. And she wasn't even presenting as female then! There really wasn't any good bathroom option for her back then.

I promise I mean no disrespect: I am just not very familiar with trans culture. Do you mean that this person was born with male anatomy but during high school was identifying as a pre-surgery trans female and not allowed to use the women's bathroom?  What exactly does "presenting as" female mean?  Just trying to make sure I understand this.

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13 minutes ago, meee said:

I promise I mean no disrespect: I am just not very familiar with trans culture. Do you mean that this person was born with male anatomy but during high school was identifying as a pre-surgery trans female and not allowed to use the women's bathroom?  What exactly does "presenting as" female mean?  Just trying to make sure I understand this.

This person was male and in high school had not yet begun to publicly identify as a woman, so she wasn't trans at all as far as other people knew at the time. She may have already known she was a woman or she might not have realized it until later, but either way everyone else knew her as just a very effeminate young man and thus she would not have used the women's bathroom but was also at risk in the men's bathroom. (I never heard of anything actually happening to her, just threats, which are bad enough.)

Edit: Presenting as female basically means someone publicly presenting themselves as a woman, whatever that means to them, as opposed to a trans woman who hasn't yet come out or who perhaps needs to temporarily not appear trans for safety reasons and who still presents themselves to the world as a man--using a male name, wearing men's clothes, having a man's haircut, etc. Obviously a lot of that will vary wildly by culture.

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