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Duggars by the Dozen 31: Dicky Duggars Do Damage


samurai_sarah

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What would happen if a Duggar kid didn't want a chocolate mess on their birthday? I remember seeing some old picture of Jessa's (I think) seventh birthday, where she had a sheet cake with a giraffe and her name on it, and the episode for Joy's 12th birthday where she had a cake that said "Have a Joy-ful birthday!" Those were birthday desserts that made the kids a little special for a day. The "every kid gets a sundae smothered in an entire bottle of Hershey's chocolate sauce" is just another sign that JB and Michelle have completely checked out.

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8 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

Every single kid gets that chocolate mess for their birthday. What if they wanted to go somewhere else for their special meal? Is that too individualistic for the Duggars?

That would require having individual thought and not being content. Can't let these kids think they're entitled to anything, that's for liberals!

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7 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

What would happen if a Duggar kid didn't want a chocolate mess on their birthday? I remember seeing some old picture of Jessa's (I think) seventh birthday, where she had a sheet cake with a giraffe and her name on it, and the episode for Joy's 12th birthday where she had a cake that said "Have a Joy-ful birthday!" Those were birthday desserts that made the kids a little special for a day. The "every kid gets a sundae smothered in an entire bottle of Hershey's chocolate sauce" is just another sign that JB and Michelle have completely checked out.

Since it's the Duggars, I completely agree, but I also remember as a kid that we had birthday traditions in my family that everyone was always excited about, when it was our turn to go (and I had to share my day because I'm a fraternal twin grrr ;) but it was still fun). So inherently, a birthday tradition isn't a bad thing. With the Duggars though and their conveyor belt processing system of their children...big difference

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They may get their own individualized birthday celebrations, too. It's just that they post about the chocolate mess. I think they must be getting their meals comped by the restaurant for posting about it, or something, and that's why they seem so obsessed.

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13 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

Every single kid gets that chocolate mess for their birthday. What if they wanted to go somewhere else for their special meal? Is that too individualistic for the Duggars?

Is it free? In Duggarville, that is all that matters.

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On 10/16/2017 at 12:18 PM, Fluffy14 said:

@samurai_sarah  No I really want to know.  When my daughter had her headinjury lawsuit against the insurance company it was based on damages done. 

I want to know from a seriously degreed lawyer or someone in that field if that is how it is awarded. 

And of course if the courts and judgments of the land base there monetary award on it , it does give some merit to evaluation of my original statement about the Duggar girls awarding in their suit.  I have no idea about suing suits  at all and I would like to know how the money thing is figured out. Do they immediately get what they asked? Or is it evaluated some how? And what is the criteria?   Just like the Danica Dillon suit, if it had moved forward how would that have been evaluated?

 

I don't know the law, but I will be sad if they win.  I tend to believe that if you sell your life on national television, then you give up your right to privacy.  What have the damages been?  The duggars are already worth millions.

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1 hour ago, Yuza Grifter said:

I don't know the law, but I will be sad if they win.  I tend to believe that if you sell your life on national television, then you give up your right to privacy.  What have the damages been?  The duggars are already worth millions.

I really don’t want to restart this discussion, but every single sexual assault victim is entitled to their privacy regardless of whether they’re public figures or not. Josh’s five victims did nothing to deserve what was done to them and none of them deserved to be outed as victims without their consent - and make no mistake, the release of the reports absolutely outed four of them. It was blatantly clear four victims were related to Josh, even with the poor redacting job, and there were only five Duggar sisters alive at the time of the attacks. It was very easy to guess which sisters were assaluted. 

Arkansas FOIA law isn’t well written according to some of our legal minds here (I think @Jess has said this.) There is a state statute that offers additional protections to victims though and seems to say that information should not be released under certain circumstances - it appears the statute may apply to the Duggar sisters and I believe the Judge cited it in a recent ruling. 

The judge tossed the suits against most of the defendants, including the group that owns In Touch magazine (who filed the FOIA request and broke the story.) The only ones who remain are, I believe, the ones directly responsible for the redacting and releasing of the reports. I have no love for this family, but I honestly believe that if the sisters can prove their case then they deserve to win it. 

As for damages, Jill and Jessa both likely lost out on several months of filming during the summer and fall of 2015. Not sure about Jinger and Joy since they don’t seem to have had major storylines back then. They may have lost other opportunities as well, like speaking engagements. I’d say they mostly suffered emotional damages though (if they can prove it.) Can you imagine how horrific it’d be to be outed as a victim of sexual abuse and for everyone to know your brother was the one who abused you?

(And just a side note for everyone before this possibly goes further - we have many posters here who are survivors of sexual assaults. I’d just like to remind everyone reading this to proceed with caution. If you’re going to post graphic commentary, please consider using a spoiler and issuing a written trigger warning. We recently had a poster fail to do either while discussing extremely graphic abuse and it further traumatized several survivors here. So everyone, please be careful and respectful in how you proceed.)

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16 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Is it free? In Duggarville, that is all that matters.

I think at this restaurant you get it for free if it's your birthday.

And I'm willing to believe that JB either doesn't tip at all, tips like 10%, or doesn't tip on the full value of service (i.e. calculate the tip including the normal cost of the Dishwasher's Nightmare Sundae).

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15 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

I really don’t want to restart this discussion, but every single sexual assault victim is entitled to their privacy regardless of whether they’re public figures or not. Josh’s five victims did nothing to deserve what was done to them and none of them deserved to be outed as victims without their consent - and make no mistake, the release of the reports absolutely outed four of them. It was blatantly clear four victims were related to Josh, even with the poor redacting job, and there were only five Duggar sisters alive at the time of the attacks. It was very easy to guess which sisters were assaluted. 

Arkansas FOIA law isn’t well written according to some of our legal minds here (I think @Jess has said this.) There is a state statute that offers additional protections to victims though and seems to say that information should not be released under certain circumstances - it appears the statute may apply to the Duggar sisters and I believe the Judge cited it in a recent ruling. 

The judge tossed the suits against most of the defendants, including the group that owns In Touch magazine (who filed the FOIA request and broke the story.) The only ones who remain are, I believe, the ones directly responsible for the redacting and releasing of the reports. I have no love for this family, but I honestly believe that if the sisters can prove their case then they deserve to win it. 

As for damages, Jill and Jessa both likely lost out on several months of filming during the summer and fall of 2015. Not sure about Jinger and Joy since they don’t seem to have had major storylines back then. They may have lost other opportunities as well, like speaking engagements. I’d say they mostly suffered emotional damages though (if they can prove it.) Can you imagine how horrific it’d be to be outed as a victim of sexual abuse and for everyone to know your brother was the one who abused you?

(And just a side note for everyone before this possibly goes further - we have many posters here who are survivors of sexual assaults. I’d just like to remind everyone reading this to proceed with caution. If you’re going to post graphic commentary, please consider using a spoiler and issuing a written trigger warning. We recently had a poster fail to do either while discussing extremely graphic abuse and it further traumatized several survivors here. So everyone, please be careful and respectful in how you proceed.)

I absolutely agree.

There is also the further element of the society they live in. I know a court can’t award damages based on fundie mores, but just consider it.

Jill and Jessa may not have told their husbands about the abuse. Can you imagine your new husband finding that out from the press? And now imagine he was a fundamentalist Christian who highly valued sexual “purity” in his bride.

And imagine being Jinger and Jot, knowing that all potential suitors will know the details of their abuse, again, among a group that give purity the highest value and has a tendency to blame victims.

They absolutely didn’t deserve to have the statements they gave in confidence, as children, released to the world.

I know this won’t be popular, but I actually don’t believe Josh should have been outed either. He was a minor when these crimes took place. Appalling as his behaviour has been, he should be entitled to the protections that other children are, and, in my understanding, juvenile records are generally sealed.

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It was good that Smuggar's crimes (and especially the cult and family's cover-up) were exposed, but really the victims should have been protected. I still hate the way the family and media handled the scandal by fixing the spotlight firmly on Jill and Jessa. Having them go on TV to give excuses for Josh's grossness and having them feature on TLC's struggle sexual abuse special just made it seem like they had to do public penance for violence that was done to them. All the public scrutiny was redirected onto them when disgusting Josh should have taken all of it.

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3 hours ago, lilith said:

I absolutely agree.

There is also the further element of the society they live in. I know a court can’t award damages based on fundie mores, but just consider it.

Jill and Jessa may not have told their husbands about the abuse. Can you imagine your new husband finding that out from the press? And now imagine he was a fundamentalist Christian who highly valued sexual “purity” in his bride.

And imagine being Jinger and Jot, knowing that all potential suitors will know the details of their abuse, again, among a group that give purity the highest value and has a tendency to blame victims.

They absolutely didn’t deserve to have the statements they gave in confidence, as children, released to the world.

I know this won’t be popular, but I actually don’t believe Josh should have been outed either. He was a minor when these crimes took place. Appalling as his behaviour has been, he should be entitled to the protections that other children are, and, in my understanding, juvenile records are generally sealed.

Josh was a minor when he assaulted them, but he was an adult when the reports were made in December 2006. That’s why the records weren’t sealed - because his parents chose to protect and conceal until someone went to the police several years later. Had the Duggars gone to police when they first learned about the assaults those records very likely would have been sealed (and rightfully so.)

So no. He did not deserve the same protections as a minor because he was not a minor when the reports were made and that is the deciding factor in how reports are treated. 

I do agree, however, that the victims didn’t deserve to have their statements or those reports published as they were without their consent. There was simply no amount of redacting possible to protect their identities and I honestly feel the justice system seriously failed to protect these young women by deciding to release the reports at all. 

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Back on the topic of homemade bread, I have a family favorite recipe I have to share.  My great aunt from Poland used to make this for the holidays (literally all holidays that aren't picnics) and my mother and I have continued the tradition, although honestly I'm a much better baker than my mom who doesn't like to follow recipes exactly so it's now all my job.  I use my breadmaker and have used full fat, low fat, and fat free sour cream and cottage cheese depending on how mean the scale is being that week.  Once I even used pineapple cottage cheese because that was what Mr GPC bought and we didn't realize it until Xmas day.  I just fished out the fruit chunks.  They all turn out really well.

Onion Dill Bread

Put in breadmaker: 2 tsp active dry yeast, 3-1/2 C bread flour, 1 tsp salt

In saucepan, warm together until butter is melted: 3/4 C cream style cottage cheese, 3/4 C sour cream, 3 Tbsp sugar, 3 Tbsp minced dried onion, 2 Tbsp dill (you can use seed or weed and I've used fresh and dried), 1-1/2 Tbsp butter

Add mixture to breadmaker, along with - 1 egg, room temperature

Use white bread setting.

If mix seems too dry, you can add up to 1/4 C warm water while mixing.

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19 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

I think at this restaurant you get it for free if it's your birthday.

And I'm willing to believe that JB either doesn't tip at all, tips like 10%, or doesn't tip on the full value of service (i.e. calculate the tip including the normal cost of the Dishwasher's Nightmare Sundae).

Or tips with Bible tracts.

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Birthday tradition at our house is that the birthday person gets to pick whatever they want for dinner and Hubby makes it for them. And they get to pick what flavor of cake they want, but the design is up to me and is a surprise right up until the candles are lit.  I bake from scratch so birthdays are popular with the kiddos' friends. Our 'adopted' kiddo turns 18 this week and I'm trying to find a really easy Assassins Creed design but its killing me!

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59 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

Birthday tradition at our house is that the birthday person gets to pick whatever they want for dinner and Hubby makes it for them. And they get to pick what flavor of cake they want, but the design is up to me and is a surprise right up until the candles are lit.  I bake from scratch so birthdays are popular with the kiddos' friends. Our 'adopted' kiddo turns 18 this week and I'm trying to find a really easy Assassins Creed design but its killing me!

the logo? You can print it and trace it on fondant, dan cut it out with a knife, let it dry a couple days and put it on the cake

 image.png.bdb8e218102406752f7227d6e1cdaae1.png

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Oh sweet Rufus.  Go take a look at the Duggar Family Blog.  There is an entry called 'Duggar Bloopers' about Josh who covered himself in Vaseline. Maybe I have the dirtiest mind on the internet, but EWWW.  Did they not see the irony?  

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On 2017-11-18 at 4:26 AM, Shadoewolf said:

Birthday tradition at our house is that the birthday person gets to pick whatever they want for dinner and Hubby makes it for them. And they get to pick what flavor of cake they want, but the design is up to me and is a surprise right up until the candles are lit.  I bake from scratch so birthdays are popular with the kiddos' friends. Our 'adopted' kiddo turns 18 this week and I'm trying to find a really easy Assassins Creed design but its killing me!

We have a similar tradition. The birthday person gets to choose their meal (curlydad wasn’t so happy when curlykid number one wanted pancakes for supper one year, but he ate them with a smile anyway ) and then I bake and decorate a cake for after. Sometimes I take requests, other times I make it a surprise. Family and friends are invited over, and we make a big celebration out of it. Our kids are still youngish, so we still decorate, but I imagine we will stop that within the next 5 years or so. 

My point is, the celebration may be similar for everyone, but it’s still personalized for the individual. 

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I would eat that Chocolate Mess over cake, but I've never been a real big fan of cake.

In our family, birthday tradition was mother baking a cake (or a BD pie in my case), our favourite meal, and no chores for the day!  The chores were the best part, my parents definitely believed idle hands were not good for kids.

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3 hours ago, SamiKatz said:

I would eat that Chocolate Mess over cake, but I've never been a real big fan of cake.

I'm the same in that regard.

Can't say I have 18 Siblings though, just 4. :)

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On 11/16/2017 at 5:16 AM, nastyhobbitses said:

 I remember seeing some old picture of Jessa's (I think) seventh birthday, where she had a sheet cake with a giraffe and her name on it ..... Those were birthday desserts that made the kids a little special for a day. 

I would agree, however, considering Jessa has made a big deal out of not liking cake (to the point she claimed spurgeon dismt like cake on his birthday) I don't think it would be all that special. I love cake but I hate chocolate cake. If someone gave me a chocolate cake knowing I don't like it then I wouldn't feel all that special andvthat seems like something a parent should know... or at least be able to confer with Jana haha

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11 hours ago, Daisy0322 said:

I would agree, however, considering Jessa has made a big deal out of not liking cake (to the point she claimed spurgeon dismt like cake on his birthday) I don't think it would be all that special. I love cake but I hate chocolate cake. If someone gave me a chocolate cake knowing I don't like it then I wouldn't feel all that special andvthat seems like something a parent should know... or at least be able to confer with Jana haha

My point still stands that her parents seemed to personalize things more when she was a kid. And who knows? Maybe she liked cake when she was younger.

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Random observation: 

For some reason I realized that I couldn't remember what Joshly named Mason.  When I looked it up on Wikipedia I saw that so far all the grandchildren had been born on odd years.  The M's are 2009/2011/2013/2015/2017.  Izzy and Spurgie are 2015 and Samuel/Henry were 2017.  Baby Forsyth is going to break that trend but I thought that was kind of cool.  Then again, I'm a math/pattern geek.  

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I don't feel sympathy for Jill or Jessa going on fox news. They didn't have to do that. They could've chose silence and let their parents and Josh take the hit. But they're both holier than thou and went through with it. So while I have sympathy for them as sexual assault victims, I don't for the way they went to the media and exposed which victims were which. That's on them. I don't believe they should get money for this either when you know it won't go towards an ounce of good. It'll fund dWRECK's missioncations and go towards anti choice movements. They don't actually care about victim's privacy. They only care about themselves. 

 

Regarding tipping, wasn't there a tabloid that called JB out on being a shitty tipper?

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On 11/22/2017 at 4:11 AM, nastyhobbitses said:

My point still stands that her parents seemed to personalize things more when she was a kid. And who knows? Maybe she liked cake when she was younger.

It’s easier to personalize when there are half the number of kids-

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