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FundieFarmer

Spanky Sproul 2: WTF is Happening, In More Ways than One

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hoipolloi
2 hours ago, DomWackTroll said:

and it just gets worse.

Oh yes --  it does get worse:

Quote

His father told him, “Son, I have two words for you- Hurry up!” And hurry up he did. July 14, 2015, my sweet prince arrived at my place of employment as I was departing for the day. Waiting for the elevator, I felt this strange sense of someone behind me, though I was standing with several people all around me. I turned to look, feeling my own curiosity and there he was. I let out a whooping, “RC!!!” (several octaves higher than my normal voice) “What are you doing here?!” “This is me pursuing you,” he stated tenderly. We embraced and then we stood there staring at one another. Our first face to face encounter. I adored this man- His red beard sprinkled with white, his golden  eyebrows and eyelashes glowing under the lights, shimmering halos around his delighted blue eyes. Both of us nervous and slightly awkward, but I was gloriously overwhelmed. He was my heart’s desire. And he came to tell me I was his.

:brainbleach::brainbleach::brainbleach:

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Howl

Their first face-to-face encounter?  Were they having phone sex?  Emailing?  What? What?  I hate to say it, but I wonder how much alcohol was involved in him stalking her at her work place. 

Edited by Howl

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treehugger

@hoipolloi, thanks for that. :shock::puke-front:

I guess there really is a person for everyone out there. 

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Marian the Librarian
4 hours ago, DomWackTroll said:

Well, if anyone knows about wedding nights…

https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vQtfqW0Sb2LDmK4Ws9BaE5A2M_DnI-6Bo6UfF08lmYhut2qFNED1c9VI-vr1TWS7tYHRLVabOBXlVm-/pub

“I say to my husband frequently that I notice how he girds himself to take on the day…”

Girds himself for what? Another court date? ‘Cause it sure ain’t a job-type job.

“Have you ever longed for, ached for, or searched for the one you love? When my husband began to pursue me, his passion was earnest.”

…and it just gets worse. I guess they’re going to try to give James and Stacy a run for their money.

"Cry out to Him (your husband) upon your bed:"

"Honeeeeeey? Where's the remote? And can you bring me a pint of Haagen Dazs chocolate when you come back from the kitchen?? Thanks, Snookums..." :pb_lol:

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DomWackTroll

“This is me pursuing you”

Spoiler


souvenir-bride-groom-face-Who-wants-drin

 

 

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stylites
12 hours ago, treehugger said:

@hoipolloi, thanks for that. :shock::puke-front:

I guess there really is a person for everyone out there. 

and that there is a grift for every grifter.

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Granwych
18 hours ago, Jasmar said:

Kilt as in “they kilt it?”

Methinks it was mayhap already dead...

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WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?
21 hours ago, Jasmar said:

Kilt as in “they kilt it?”

Or this:

Spoiler

FB_IMG_1485401975945.jpg.5568997dda573a438e7426ba2a91e2de.jpg

Okay, that doesn't really apply, but I like that meme. :my_biggrin:

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CyborgKin

Well thanks, now I need to set my brain on fire :(

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Emilycharlotte

 "Golden eyebrows?" 

"This is me, pursuing you"? 

I'm not sure if I'm confused, amused, or just slightly queasy.  Is it possible to write cheesy fan fiction about yourself? 

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Jasmar

She was doing it when she came here, iirc, so why not? Wherefore art thou, Shmoopy?

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Granwych
2 hours ago, Jasmar said:

She was doing it when she came here, iirc, so why not? Wherefore art thou, Shmoopy?

It must not be pay week at Spanky Inc.  Although Schmoopy insists (s)he isn't on the payroll there.

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Emilycharlotte

My husband has similar coloring to RC. I think when I get home tonight I'll wax poetic about his gleaming golden lashes and delighted blue eyes; it's Valentine's Day, right?

(If you all don't hear from me for a while, you'll know my husband either had me committed, or locked me in the attic, Rochester-style. Don't worry, though--I could use a nice rest.)

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nickelodeon

The "MARRIAGE EXPERTS after being married for two months" thing is cringey enough when it's a couple of 23-year-olds, but grown-ass adults doing it is REALLY not a good look.

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hoipolloi

But remember, a truly godly friend won't criticize you, presumably not even for drunken driving:

N.B. the following: 

Quote

If you are the friend on the journey, do not misrepresent God by using Him as your excuse to accuse or form opinions instead, ask God to keep you from being the friend that needed correction. 

 

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ophelia
3 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

The "MARRIAGE EXPERTS after being married for two months" thing is cringey enough when it's a couple of 23-year-olds, but grown-ass adults doing it is REALLY not a good look.

And isn't this her 2nd or 3rd marriage already? Nothing wrong with that and with this many prior relationships in her past she probably knows her way around, but in their circles this actually shouldn't be something to be open about.

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Howl

It's third or fourth....

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ViolaSebastian

Wait. Two people who have been married six times between them and have zero training as counselors in marriage and family therapy are going to tell me how to keep love alive through...a year and a half? Okay then.

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fundiefan
On 2/12/2018 at 7:00 PM, hoipolloi said:

Oh yes --  it does get worse:

:brainbleach::brainbleach::brainbleach:

How pathetically, dangerously, miserably sad is this? 

No sex before mariage, fine. I don't think there is an adult on the plaenet who would say sex before marriage is necessary. 

There isn't a "sex now/always" movement. 

But this...this....is nothing short of abuse. 

 

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