The Hawkins Family

[Coy Koi]

Good Lord Becky, have you ever looked at your life? This life you describe sounds like paradise compared to it, assuming the person lives in a dwelling fit for human habitation, doesn't have to be married to Gary, gets to see their kids more than a few hours a month, and doesn't spend their time crammed into a rickety, broken-down RV spreading hate and aggressively begging for money.

[Georgiana]

Sis Becky sounds like the Matt Foley of motivational Plexus speakers.

[mango_fandango]

Not *quite* sure about the exhaustion/debt thing, but many people manage to stay in shape (well, fairly healthy anyways), have a job they love and have time for hobbies. It's always about extremes with fundies. An actual/corporate style job doesn't have to be awful. 

It's also a huge gamble working from home, especially if you're in a shitty pyramid scheme like Plexus. 

[General Jinjur]

Ok Becky, bless your heart.

I think we're obligated to go with "Saved and full of gravy" as the next thread title.

Yes Bro, KING JAMES BIBLE says you should pray. But I think there's also something in there about praying in private and not gathering a group of assholes to join hands around an RV.

Sis Jinjur

ETA Sis Gee, you just made me snort my drank with that Matt Foley pic.

[unsafetydancer]

11 minutes ago, General Jinjur said:

 

ETA Sis Gee, you just made me snort my drank with that Matt Foley pic.

Hahaha me too! Bravo @Georgiana

[Georgiana]

Thank you, @General Jinjur and @unsafetydancer.  Every time I make a pic like that, no matter how long it takes, I always have a moment where I look at myself and say, "What on Earth are you doing with your life that this is what you choose to spend time on?"

Worth it.  

 

[Hane]

Ducking in to say I had to stop following this thread very closely because of the mention of the "pink ween gravy." (Just typing that grossed me out.) I am reminded of a story from my very Italian uncle, a WWII Army cook. He once made spaghetti, and the Southern soldiers demanded to know why he'd left out the hot dogs. 

[Coy Koi]

Spoiler

 

He's preaching to an empty church but you can't even hear what he's saying. But at about 4 minutes in, they start singing, and oh boy...you can hear that, but you'll wish you couldn't. And against all odds, it just keeps getting worse and worse as they go on. If you can't take the whole musical performance just start at about 9 minutes. Omg. Do these people exist for the sole purpose of making the Rods look better??

[Curious]

3 hours ago, Georgiana said:

Hawkins Family 2: Electric Weenaloo

Ok folks, I  append Electric Boogaloo to everything I say it part of something, I now have a VERY. ANGRY 5lb dog on my lap because I snorted so loud when I saw Weenaloo that I woke her up from her nap.

Thankfully, I had put my water down before I read it because I would have aspirated or did a spit take all over my keyboard when I saw it.

Sis C

[snarkopolis]

Ok folks.

Praise Jinger!

I have learned many things in this thread. The War on Civilization is REAL!11 The combination of the words pink, ween and gravy make me want to vomit. We now know who the creator of the phrase "word salad" was listening to. RV grifiting is an art form (Jrod) that many have not yet mastered. And why does Bro Gary's church have an Israeli flag on the altar? Praying the KJV bibble has answers.

Yours in grammar

Sis Snark

 

 

[Dandruff]

I'd like to see Bro Gary and Jill Rod attempt to grift from each other.

[KnittingOwl]

On 9/12/2017 at 4:27 AM, Tim-Tom Biblethumper said:

Ok Folks, THAT is Nanner puddin' and a delicacy in the Deep South.  Personally I would've put another layer of wafers on the top, but that's just me.

Sis Biblethumper 

Ok folks, I am with @Tim-Tom Biblethumper on this one.

Real BBQ and banana pudding are the two foods I miss most not living in the South anymore.  Personally, I would have also put some Cool Whip on the top with more Nilla wafers.

Sis KnittingOwl

11 hours ago, Leftitinmysnood said:

I must have had a presentiment because I actually made banana pudding yesterday before the thread post. No boxed pudding here, though. That custard must be made from scratch in a double boiler or my great grandmama will haint me.

Sis Snood

Is that a recipe you can share? Or would that also result in being hainted?

Sis KnittingOwl

[Lurky]

OK folks when Bro Gary says he was preaching to 11 in total, does that include his own family?  I do appreciate Bro Hodnett giving us his numbers with and without Hods!

Against my better judgement I listened to the first two "songs" in that video, and it's weird how Becky so often skips the first word or two of each line. Not just when she sings "in harmony" either.  My partner is tone deaf and could tell it was way out of key.

Isn't it funny how Bro Gary is one of those who's all "if you don't like what I write, don't follow me on FB", but doesn't apply that in his own life?  He could just as easily ignore gay people, and all the other people he criticises, but like so much, it's HOLY when he does it, and Satan when anyone else does.

Sis Lurky

[FundamentallyShocked]

12 hours ago, Coy Koi said:

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 If you can't take the whole musical performance just start at about 9 minutes. Omg. Do these people exist for the sole purpose of making the Rods look better??

The song at 9 minutes will make you want to tear out your eardrums!  Oh, my!!!!!!

Last night, I cooked tortillini, garlic cheese toast, and salad for dinner. As the family gathered around the stove, I may have declared boldly that it was "good ween". Silence descended from on high. Let's just say that there was some cautious picking among the pasta looking for chopped hot dogs last night :-)

Sis Fundamentally Shocked

[Baaaaaabe]

On 9/5/2017 at 6:42 PM, Georgiana said:

OK folks,

This thread is chock full of TRULY choice weens.  I thank you all.  Also, I made this (I have no idea why), and my coworker asked "What's a good ween?".

I couldn't answer.  I tried, and I started laughing.  

Truly I need more weenie gravy in my life,

Sis. @Georgiana

  Hide contents

 

Work's been super busy and my health has been extra craptacular lately. After having to go on steroids for a SEVERE allergic reaction to lord knows what, I'm now home sick with a cold or infection or something. I decided to catch up on JRod, which led to this thread, which led to this.  Let me just say that laughing raucously with a head full of whatever's-in-there is less than comfortable, but totally worth it. This is the funniest thing I've seen in so, so long. I'm dying. Halp. Send more decongestants and tissues.  

[General Jinjur]

Ok folks, sweet merciful crap that singing is amazing. My ears are bleeding. Becky sure does have a melodious voice.

Yours in weens,

Sis Jinjur

[smittykins]

15 hours ago, General Jinjur said:

 

Ok Becky, bless your heart.

I think we're obligated to go with "Saved and full of gravy" as the next thread title.

Yes Bro, KING JAMES BIBLE says you should pray. But I think there's also something in there about praying in private and not gathering a group of assholes to join hands around an RV.

 

I believe there's also something there about "he that will not work, should not eat."  NO WEENS FOR YOU!

sis smittykins 

[MayMay1123]

50 minutes ago, Baaaaaabe said:

Work's been super busy and my health has been extra craptacular lately. After having to go on steroids for a SEVERE allergic reaction to lord knows what, I'm now home sick with a cold or infection or something.

i have been dealing with the exact same shit since 4th of july! steroids made me lose weight though...great side affect for me!

[Flossie]

18 hours ago, Georgiana said:

Thread title suggestions:

Hawkins Family 2: Electric Weenaloo

Hawkins Family 2: Pink Weens in ME

Hawkins Family 2: Still saved, Still full of Gravy

Hawkins Family 2: Punctuation: No; Weens: Yes

Hawkins Family 2: Pink Drink, Pinker Gravy, Pinkest weens

OK folks, 

I'm going for "Hawkins Family 2: Still saved, Still full of Gravy"

Sis Flossie

[BlackberryGirl]

On September 5, 2017 at 10:31 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Maybe squirt a little Ween gravy on their buns for a fun surprise. 

Oh god.. I just woke up all 5 cats laughing so loud...sorry kitties. 

 

Sis BlackberryGirl, with too long hair wanting a haircut, but not the side shaved..

[BlackberryGirl]

If you wanted to make my FIL (raised in Alabama/Mississippi) feel like he had died and gone to heaven, give him cornbread in milk and some butterbeans. My MIL often made that for his Saturday lunch. 

[BlackberryGirl]

IIRC Cher has openly talked about her struggle with severe dyslexia. I will give her a pass on her Twitter. Tweets are usually done in real time. When Cher has some kind of public statement to make it is correct in spelling and grammar.  So I will give her a pass.

I have been reading Bro. Hawkins stuff like a reading disabilities diagnostician, (which I used to was)  he has trouble with possesives, he spells phonetically, that is as he hears words in a heavy Southern accent. He makes every common spelling and grammar error I have ever seen... Women for the singular, drank, and on and on. He also appears to skip words or whole thoughts as he types. 

It doesn't help that he is stupid and mean.  

I just find myself reading his crap like a scientist looking at a particularly icky bug under a microscope.

saved and full of gravy, Sis BlackberryGirl, uh

[AlwaysExcited]

19 hours ago, Coy Koi said:

Ok, sis Becky,

We can read just fine, no need to put these emojis after every word. It's actually childish and distracting. 

sis. AlwaysExcited

[Palimpsest]

9 minutes ago, BlackberryGirl said:

IIRC Cher has openly talked about her struggle with severe dyslexia. I will give her a pass on her Twitter.

Yes.  Cher has been open about her dyslexia.  It is not nice to mock her on Twitter.  I'm also not keen on phrases like "oldpeopleonFacebook range."  They sound ageist and that is also not nice.   One of the nice things about FJ is that we have a huge age range here.  IIRC, members range in age from 18 to 70+. 

I know plenty of people quite a few years older than I am managing very well on social media.  It is actually much harder to keep up with developing technology when you are out of the workforce and don't have IT assistance easily available.  There are a lot of retired people frantically taking courses trying to keep up as technology advances at breathtaking speed.

16 minutes ago, BlackberryGirl said:

I just find myself reading his crap like a scientist looking at a particularly icky bug under a microscope.

I can't help wondering whether he is badly educated, stupid, and mean, but also deliberately putting on some of his "good 'ol southern boy from the holler who don't need no book learnin' " act.  He's like a stereotype of a stereotype.

[General Jinjur]

10 minutes ago, AlwaysExcited said:

Ok, sis Becky,

We can read just fine, no need to put these emojis after every word. It's actually childish and distracting. 

sis. AlwaysExcited

She's probably used to drawing things for Bro Gary since he don't read so good.