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Lori Alexander 25: A Wife Is a Good *Thing*


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Usually people stope using the word "poop" after, maybe, age eight or ten?? At least they don't use it as frequently as Lori does. Lori - a "teacher" and "mentor;" a woman who is supposed to be discreet with her words. 

Seriously, does she not realize how juvenile her writing is?  Her father is a doctor, for crying out loud!! You'd think the child of a doctor would have grown up hearing more intelligent words. She can ask her dad about anal sex but she can't ask him for another word for poop?!? 

Sigh!  I simply don't have time to keep improving Lori's blog but I have taken the time to screen shot a page from an online thesaurus - BECAUSE COME ON!! This is ridiculous. Is she deliberately using childish words so she can appear even more weak and dumb? Does she think that is appealing to men?? 

I can't even with this woman. 

IMG_7581.JPG

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1 hour ago, Petronella said:

BlackSheep, I agree with your whole post! Just quoting to say "Edvard Munch" not Van Gogh :-)

Oh maaaaan! Thank you for correcting me @Petronella.

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11 hours ago, usmcmom said:

Surely Ken got some pushback on yesterday's sex post because of his declaration that 2 to 3 times a week was "God's prescription."  I am sure they refused to publish lots of comments. 

<spoilered text>

Anyway, I am always livid when he and Lori write their own version of the Bible. I wonder what they'll call their new church....

This is really more of a forum-procedural comment and maybe it doesn't belong here, but for quite a while now I've been noticing people spoilering things in an apparent attempt to hide a comment from the general public or sometimes from a particular fundie.

I just thought I'd mention that one does not have to be logged in to see spoilers.  Anyone looking at the page can click the spoiler button and see the contents of the spoiler, even if they are not an FJ member.  (This might have been different on the earlier software, I can't remember.)

If I've misunderstood the reason for the spoiler then "never mind," said in my best Roseanne Roseannadanna voice...

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@church_of_dog. I've wondered thst myself.  Can we really hide things?  The spoilers seem to be more " as to not make a wall o' text" for phone users??  I assume that because Coconut flan cleans stuff up.  While lurking, I came across some spoilers that I could not read but I haven't figured out why or how.

ETA:  I have also upvoted two people and got a notice that I don't have permission to do so.  But, on my end I seems my upvote went through.  ???

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7 minutes ago, Beermeet said:

ETA:  I have also upvoted two people and got a notice that I don't have permission to do so.  But, on my end I seems my upvote went through.  ???

In my experience that happens when you've accidentally tried to upvote twice and it's telling you you can't do it because you've already done it.

As for spoilers I do understand using them to reduce space taken by photos or walls-o-text, or for triggery stuff.  But I didn't want anyone to be mistaken that it was a "members-only" thing.  As far as I know only AYTFJ is members-only.

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In my experience that happens when you've accidentally tried to upvote twice and it's telling you you can't do it because you've already done it.
As for spoilers I do understand using them to reduce space taken by photos or walls-o-text, or for triggery stuff.  But I didn't want anyone to be mistaken that it was a "members-only" thing.  As far as I know only AYTFJ is members-only.

In which she speaks the truth on both counts.
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52 minutes ago, church_of_dog said:

This is really more of a forum-procedural comment and maybe it doesn't belong here, but for quite a while now I've been noticing people spoilering things in an apparent attempt to hide a comment from the general public or sometimes from a particular fundie.

I just thought I'd mention that one does not have to be logged in to see spoilers.  Anyone looking at the page can click the spoiler button and see the contents of the spoiler, even if they are not an FJ member.  (This might have been different on the earlier software, I can't remember.)

If I've misunderstood the reason for the spoiler then "never mind," said in my best Roseanne Roseannadanna voice...

Now I remember! When FJ made some big changes a year or so ago, we WERE told that we would no longer be able to hide things. 

My mistake and I apologize for that oversight.  I am mad at myself for likely outing myself to certain bloggers. CRAP!!  

ETA: I am now desperately missing the delete option. 

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5 hours ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

Hhahah whoever was comparing Lori to Activist Mommy got it right. Her doodle just now on facebook talks about the Teen Vogue Anal sex drama. She figured she better get on this bandwagon in hopes of going viral like Activist. 

I haven't read either one of them on the topic, but I'm still trying to figure out how Teen Vogue managed to forget a really crucially important female body part in their diagram of the female body.

But hey, penis! So I guess they have something in common with Lori.

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6 hours ago, Curious said:

Did any of you actually read the article?  It's written by a sex educator.  It was written in plain english and was, IMO, less vulgar than things that Lori and other fundies post about sex.

It also had nice big diagrams for those people that think you pee out of your vajayjay :pb_rollseyes:

I did, actually.

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1 hour ago, Beermeet said:

@church_of_dog. I've wondered thst myself.  Can we really hide things?  The spoilers seem to be more " as to not make a wall o' text" for phone users??  I assume that because Coconut flan cleans stuff up.  While lurking, I came across some spoilers that I could not read but I haven't figured out why or how.

ETA:  I have also upvoted two people and got a notice that I don't have permission to do so.  But, on my end I seems my upvote went through.  ???

3

We briefly had a "hide from non-members" kind of spoiler on phpbb, but we had to remove it because it was doing all kinds of bad things to...formatting? ( @Destiny)

Sometimes if you are lagging a little bit, the server will register 2 clicks and they yells at you for trying to upvote twice so you can't give that member rep.  Usually, it takes a second to register your upvote and then all is fine and your vote actually went through.

21 minutes ago, polecat said:

I did, actually.

 

 

I don't think you'd commented at the time I made my post.  Also I didn't notice anything missing on the female diagram, so now I have to go look again.

In general, I like Teen Vogue (I do not like Vogue).  They were amazing during the election.

ETA:  I'm dumb today, I guess.  I don't see anything missing :(  Give me a hint?

ETA 2: Nevermind, I figured it out.  I AM dumb today!

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@molecule Thanks for the link to Babylon Bee! They sum up Lori beautifully....

Quote

“It’s really amazing—when I just make the effort to spend a few deliberate, hasty minutes in the Word, I can get the text to fall in line with my preconceived notions about issues that matter to me,” she was heard saying as she consciously chose to ignore the clear meaning of the inspired words in favor of an unlikely interpretation only arrived by imposing her worldview on the text.

 

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Would someone please tell me how to make the @FJusername icon.  I've done it once by accident and cannot remember how I did it,  Thanks

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1 minute ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Would someone please tell me how to make the @FJusername icon.  I've done it once by accident and cannot remember how I did it,  Thanks

sure you type the @ symbol and then a drop down box will start to appear (most of the time) and you pick the name of the user off that.  The more of the name you type, then more it narrows down your choices.

The @ does not seem to like something typed directly before it like a ( or ".  I find if there is something before the @ it won't make the little dropdown start.

If you just type @curious it won't be a tag/notification thingy.  You have to pick it off the drop down.

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Ok. So I had to go read the article in Teen Vogue. I didn't see anything wrong with it. Sure, it can be uncomfortable to think that it may be necessary to have this conversation but thats the reality. Teenagers have sex. I didn't read anything that sounded like it was promoting the act. It was informative. 

We had an extremely open relationship with our daughter that allowed any subject to be discussed without judgement. As a result I ended up having conversations with many friends of my daughter who felt they couldn't talk to any adult. For kids that don't have a trusted adult, articles like this can answer questions without fear. 

The Activist Mommy is a sensationalist much like Hillsboro Baptist. I find her easy to dismiss because she doesn't hold back the way our friend Aunt Lori attempts to. TAM has full on crazy eye in the mag burning video. 

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On 20.7.2017 at 3:14 AM, EowynW said:

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10213767786657448&id=1489807399

The fact that Lori cannot see this is proof of her hard & proud heart. 

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10213552726635410&id=1319666953

and this reflects who Ken really is. 

Wow! I just read through those @EowynW. What amazing finds! Thanks for sharing.  

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From her latest post:

Quote

Older women are to teach the young women to love their husbands. This does not come naturally nor easily for most women. They look and act their best before marriage but after marriage, many no longer care about looking or acting their best for their husbands. Instead, they spend their time being angry and upset with their husbands because their husbands are not living up to their expectations and the wives fail to realize that love is a commitment and an action, not feelings or emotions based.

I wonder if Lori has ever given any thought to the fact that marital love is a process.  I agree with her that it has to be learned, but not the way she teaches it.  Most Christians marry while they are still very much in love. They haven't lived together and they may not know all that much about each other.  Most young couples don't know what their spouse is like on a daily basis. They don't know how they get up in the morning, their bathroom habits, their laundry habits, how they sleep....  and that's your ordinary non-fundy Christian couple who've spent a lot of time together, on their own, and may have even spent a night or two together in some situation or another.   In fundieland, where young couples go into marriage after carefully chaperoned courtships and absolutely no sexual contact at all, are going to be in for an even greater shock. 

Of course there will be friction! Of course some expectations might go unmet!  Over the years, most wives will start to appreciate their husbands more. And most husbands will start to appreciate their wives more. Love grows in marriages where both spouses love each other and want to commit to each other, but that love is not forced and can't be "taught" the way lori thinks.  You can't fast forward those years because it takes time, but in my opinion, the process of learning to love your spouse for the person your spouse was created to be is the goal of marriage.  Learning to live as one, not this ridiculous role-play Lori and Ken teach, is marriage.  

So I agree that older women teach the younger women, but they do so by modeling that settled, contented love that they have worked on for decades. The real deal.  They teach it when they listen to the frustrated wife, understand her frustration, and support her through the difficult years of learning to love. They teach it when they share their own struggles of learning to love an imperfect spouse. They teach it when they don't condemn the young woman and simply encourage her to keep on.  Lori does none of this. Instead, she simply beats the young wives over the head with a few Bible verses that she pulls out of context.   I wonder what the apostles would have to say if they read how their words have been interpreted by women like Debi Pearl and Lori.  They'd probably have to sit down and write a new epistle. The epistle to the "Titus 2 Ladies": get off the internet, you busybodies, get out of your homes and start doing something good for a change!  Grace to you from my prison cell."

 

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@onemama as someone who has only been married 18 months, I appreciate this greatly. In person I only know fundie and fundie lite women, so all advice is given with with bent toward being submissive and gentle "remember your place" type advice. I left fundiedom as soon as I married and got out.  One of the things i love about these LA threads is the glimpses into other marriages and the advice shared here. 

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my mom has this book. I read it a few years ago and couldn't get through it. Awful book. Teaches you how to be subservient. 

My mom was so submissive that she wouldn't even speak up to put my dad in his place when he would be unfairly angry at his. He'd be yelling and she'd just be standing there, not saying a word. 

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19 hours ago, smittykins said:

(For some reason, this box regarding what their church's name would be came up blank.)

I vote Lady of Perpetual Lube.

15 hours ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

I have to say I'm with Activist Mommy on this one. There is no need to discuss anal sex in a magazine for young girls. Stick to fashion and boy bands.

A lot of those young girls are already dating and having sex, though, possibly with partners who are urging them to have anal sex like the porn stars they've seen on the net. I'd rather they get an informed view of it and be able to make their own decision rather than risk getting hurt. 

@usmcmom: That graphic is probably the closest image I've ever seen to what a migraine feels like.

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Lori:

Quote

Whenever I hear from a woman who tells me that they argue a lot, I tell her to stop. As she argues with her husband, she is sinning by not being under her husband’s leadership. She needs to learn to state her opinion and then let it go without arguing her point. It is better to not get her way, live at peace with her husband, and allow him to make the decisions than getting  her way, living in turmoil, and disobeying God.

Lori takes Bible verses out of context, and she takes arguing out of context. Sometimes it's not enough to "state [your] opinion and then let it go without arguing [your] point".

If, for example, your husband (or wife!), is staying out all night without explanation, abusing drugs, or things along those lines, and you say, "Honey, please don't do [whatever]", and your spouse doesn't want to interact about that subject - that's a huge red flag.

A serious situation needs back and forth communication. Each one needs to express their side of it so that a solution can be found. Voices might be raised and tempers might flare. An argument doesn't necessarily mean that the wife is being a shrew and the husband is beleaguered. Maybe, maybe not.

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18 hours ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

I have to say I'm with Activist Mommy on this one. There is no need to discuss anal sex in a magazine for young girls. Stick to fashion and boy bands.

Yeah let's keep them ignorant cause it works so well!

Disclaimer: I'd agree with you if we were talking about glamorising anal sex, but since we are talking about informing then no I think that a soon to be adult has a right to know her body and yes even how to safely give it pleasure. There's so much dangerous misinformation among teens about sex matters that whatever provides correct information I welcome it. If you have a problem with teens having sex then it's your problem, they aren't going to wait for your permission nor for Teen Vogue's blessing. In spite of all rethuglican rhetoric abstinence talks (i refuse to call it education) and ignorance won't keep teens from having sex.

ETA "stick to fashion and boy bands" sounds very dismissive of teens intelligence, former teen me would have felt offended.

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I thought the Teen Vogue article was mostly well done. It was respectful and gave very sound advice, although it gave insufficient attention to female pleasure. I was shocked that the clitoris was left off the female anatomy diagram.

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As someone who just graduated high school a few years ago, I think it's a good thing Teen Vogue does articles like that. The more (correct and helpful) information that teen girls get, the better. If teens are having sex (and THEY ARE), they need to have information in order to properly protect themselves, and generally there are not a lot of outlets for good information. It's silly to think this is glamorizing anal sex. It's disappointing to think people would rather have a girl pressured into something she knows nothing about than enter her sexual encounters armed with facts and know how. 

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