Jump to content
IGNORED

Dillards 35: Waiting on People Magazine


Coconut Flan

Recommended Posts

Just now, Fluffy14 said:

I can see this.  But how long do you have to resist?  In keeping this in line with the Duggar's specifically? Resistance does not have to take a long time..either you are willing to admit  something or not.....it really depends on your state of humility.  

There is no evidence that any of the Duggar adult children are resisting anything, shorts and all that doesn't matter. Some do take longer than others to break free, but if niggling doubts cause you to double down and never move toward freedom, I say you are no longer doubting. And yes, at some point, its takes being willing to humbly see things as they really are.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 625
  • Created
  • Last Reply
4 minutes ago, Fluffy14 said:

I can see this.  But how long do you have to resist?  In keeping this in line with the Duggar's specifically? Resistance does not have to take a long time..either you are willing to admit  something or not.....it really depends on your state of humility.  

How long?  I don't know.  I have never lived in a situation as controlling as the Duggars so I can't speak from experience, but I would guess a rather long time.  Everything has always been simple and decided.  If your wrong EVERYTHING is wrong.  I expect it takes some time to decide that everything you know is wrong.  Especially if you haven't had much experience in logical thinking or in the idea that there may be some gray.  As a practical matter none of this may matter much.  But there may be some internal battles we don't see, and I personally blame them for imposing on others while still feeling sorry for them.  I also don't think humility is the only problem.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, Greendoor said:

Man alive that's crazy.  I had my son: at  9.5 cms they gave me an epidural.  He ended up a c-section as I i never got to 10 and it had been hours. 

I happened to be super lucky and deliver the night they were switching over the computer system, so they expected at least an hour to get the anesthesiologist, consent forms, and medication delivered to the room.  I had consulted with him when I got admitted and told him I didn't want an epidural.  I was SO wrong.  If I am induced again, I'm getting an epidural right away.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

47 minutes ago, justoneoftwo said:

Especially if you haven't had much experience in logical thinking or in the idea that there may be some gray.

I will admit this is a problem.  The reason I keep going back to the humility aspect of it is because it is a HUGE part of the christian faith.  Jesus himself was the epitome of humility.  

When John the Baptist said I must decrease so He must increase......Jesus answer was this:  In Luke 7:28, Jesus declared John the Baptist to be the greatest man to have ever lived: "I tell you, among those born of women there is no one greater than John ..."

That is the Son of God saying nobody was greater that John! The sermon on the mount is about humility.  Jesus whole life was based out of humility. 

My argument is for a family who bases their whole belief system on Christianity .....humility should be one of their biggest goals and biggest attributes.  So if they cannot admit to being remotely wrong in some of their biggest beliefs where is the humility ?  Where is the humility in saying Wow we got that wrong? Wow we misunderstood that? I am so sorry we misled a whole nation telling them how righteous we are when we are not!!! 

If the Duggar family had any humility they would have taken those comments, articles, sermons and looked at them and the outcome would be very different right now for them. 

I have to point back to the basics of their belief system. They run around saying this person is humble, that person is humble, Jimbob is humble, Michelle is humble.  Where is the humility? I don't see it.

If you don't have humility you cannot see wrong in yourself. If you don't have humility you can't see you need change.  I think that is bigger than anything else. And I think it is one of the reasons why the adult children have not left the fold of indoctrination.  That is why they don't believe comments, articles, explaining the situation they are in. 

It begins with humility. Once you come to that and empty yourself of how right you think you are, when truth seeps in I think it has the capability of turning into a river of knowledge pretty fast.  

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

One of the nurses was taking photos with my camera right after our first was born. She got one that was super cute of me looking at him, but she was standing back too far so she also got my midwife stitching me up. It makes me lol so hard because I'm so oblivious to the whole thing going on downstairs when I'm holding my baby for the first time. 

Reminds me of the time my nephew and his wife were expecting.   Friends of theirs had just had a baby (Before digital cameras) and had put together an album of the baby's birth.   They asked Nephew and Wife if they wanted to see the baby's pictures.  Sure....   

Nephew opens up the album and there is a picture of the baby's head emerging from the birth canal.   

He said he knows more about his friend's wife than he ever wanted to know...........

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 minutes ago, MoonFace said:

Reminds me of the time my nephew and his wife were expecting.   Friends of theirs had just had a baby (Before digital cameras) and had put together an album of the baby's birth.   They asked Nephew and Wife if they wanted to see the baby's pictures.  Sure....   

Nephew opens up the album and there is a picture of the baby's head emerging from the birth canal.   

He said he knows more about his friend's wife than he ever wanted to know...........

Not quite as graphic but my husband is from the other side of the world so when I had our first child I still hadn't met a lot of his relatives. That first picture of me holding the baby also had my breast hanging out as I had just been feeding him, I think husband was in a post baby fog. It got sent to all the relatives overseas. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 minutes ago, MoonFace said:

Nephew opens up the album and there is a picture of the baby's head emerging from the birth canal.   

He said he knows more about his friend's wife than he ever wanted to know...........

Gross, somethings should not be photographed and put in photo albums and shown to other people.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

46 minutes ago, Glasgowghirl said:

Gross, somethings should not be shown to other people without them knowing what they're in for and consenting first.  

Fixed that for you! :pb_lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, meee said:

I know I'm way behind but I've seen mention of Jill looking like she's had a stroke?  What do people see that indicates that?  She's using both of her hands in that picture, smiling...I'm no medical professional, but she looks okay to me especially after what seems like a pretty complicated birth.

For me, I was falling over myself to try not to say stroke, but I was/am one of the ones inwardly putting a question mark over 'neuro involvement?'. For me that stemmed from two things: predominantly from the pose of her left arm. Mine does that periodically because I have an ABI (acquired brain injury). Mr mio refers to it as my 'eagle claw'. It predominantly happens on bad brain days or when I'm tired. The secondary thing to that was, for a woman with at least some training in first/emergency aid, plus whatever basics of midwifery she's had - not to mention how many babies she's been around during her lifetime, it seems odd that she isn't cradling the baby in her left arm head-to-heart unless she's not able/allowed to.

...but that's just the insides of my dim and dingy mind.

 

Actually, the further we get into this, the more I'm thinking it can't be that. I'm thinking more likely whatever happened was short-term impactful and she's just having a rest/putting her mind into order again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, MadeItOut said:

it seems odd that she isn't cradling the baby in her left arm head-to-heart unless she's not able/allowed to.

Huh. All this time I never knew that I had been holding my daughter "wrong." I seriously didn't know you were supposed to hold a baby on your left arm?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Fluffy14 said:

I can see this.  But how long do you have to resist?  In keeping this in line with the Duggar's specifically? Resistance does not have to take a long time..either you are willing to admit  something or not.....it really depends on your state of humility.  

 

In DV situations, bearing in mind the cohort for data, while now longstanding, has certain limitations - mostly in a western dominant profile and fairly unbalanced gender wise (due mostly to needing to rely on self disclosure pretty often), the typical mean average pattern is pretty much that it takes a good deal of thinking/planning stages, then roughly 35 'rehearsals' before a successful breakaway. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Once again, my hand makes exactly that shape when I'm holding my phone in that particular position. And, though it's a really poor quality photo, Jill appears to be holding something in that hand that looks rectangular, dark, and somewhat reflective - suspiciously similar to an iPhone.

That's my theory. I'm going to go ahead and say that I think it's at least as plausible as the theory that she had a stroke or acquired a brain injury during the birth.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, justoneoftwo said:

How long?  I don't know.  I have never lived in a situation as controlling as the Duggars so I can't speak from experience, but I would guess a rather long time.  Everything has always been simple and decided.  If your wrong EVERYTHING is wrong.  I expect it takes some time to decide that everything you know is wrong.  Especially if you haven't had much experience in logical thinking or in the idea that there may be some gray.  As a practical matter none of this may matter much.  But there may be some internal battles we don't see, and I personally blame them for imposing on others while still feeling sorry for them.  I also don't think humility is the only problem.  

Add to all of this the weird cognitive dissonance that comes with the realisation that the situation you're in not only makes no sense to you, but also there's a world full of people out there who wouldn't get it either - even if you're lucky enough to have a dim awareness of outside help systems etc, the very nature of the isolation, plus it's not at all uncommon for the abuser to have pointed out how "no one will ever believe you" and that can be massively powerful too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Okay so two hours ago Cathy posted via twitter 

"Didn't want to take him back but I did finally! Happy to give them time to get settled in first."

   This was in response to a poster who asked what's the deal with Jill. 

   So everyone seems to be home? 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, going to finally jump into this...while it is odd for the Duggars not to be posting all kinds of photos, and that Jessa made the TV announcement, let's keep in mind Jill was very silent throughout this pregnancy.  Yeah, there may have been complications (and I really hope if there were it was nothing significant), but it could just as easily be a continuation of the radio silence.  

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Huh. All this time I never knew that I had been holding my daughter "wrong." I seriously didn't know you were supposed to hold a baby on your left arm?

I don't know that it's taught as 'wrong' per sey, more that it's widely held that head-to-heart is best for baby. - it could also just be a European thing too. From the sounds of just the last few days alone we have widely differing birth cultures.

It's awesome if you guys out there at least get a pass on that one - our lot come down like a ton of bricks on every little thing.

16 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

Once again, my hand makes exactly that shape when I'm holding my phone in that particular position. And, though it's a really poor quality photo, Jill appears to be holding something in that hand that looks rectangular, dark, and somewhat reflective - suspiciously similar to an iPhone.

That's my theory. I'm going to go ahead and say that I think it's at least as plausible as the theory that she had a stroke or acquired a brain injury during the birth.

I remember you mentioning that when it was all fresh - you have such a good eye.

The more this goes on, the more I'm thinking you're right - perhaps a small bump in the road requiring a break. After all, if there were any long term disability situation they'd have come out with it at the time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I actually think it's great they're being quiet. I guess I'm in the minority.

i also think it's very plausible tlc is telling them to be quiet. They're always behind the times with weddings/courtships/babies, etc when episodes are aired. They need *something*  to show to keep things interesting, how many recaps and explanations of courtship rules can viewers reasonably stand to put up with?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Fjrocks said:

Okay so two hours ago Cathy posted via twitter 

"Didn't want to take him back but I did finally! Happy to give them time to get settled in first."

   This was in response to a poster who asked what's the deal with Jill. 

   So everyone seems to be home? 

I'm assuming she means GIVE him back, in reference to Israel? In which case yeah, sounds like everybody is home which should be good news. I hope the speculation on here was wildly off base and Jill and Sammy are, for the most part, just fine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't think its odd Jill is holding the baby in her right arm, and the pic didn't scream worry some to me. It is all very strange that a simple, It was a difficult birth I'm fine I'm looking forward to some rest and quiet, will get back to you when I feel up to it.  This would have put any speculation to rest and given her time,  

I think she had a difficult delivery and needed time to recover.  I also think she's sick of the hate and is just keeping her mouth shut.  She is the Duggar behind Josh everyone loves to hate on for everything from the look in her eyes to the clothes she pics for her kid, to her word choices, her bowl choices when feeding Izzy.  If I think about it she's probably fed up because no matter what she does she will be criticized for it. Right or wrong she has an image problem and she can't seem to grasp how to get beyond it other than just disappearing into the woodwork. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Fjrocks said:

Okay so two hours ago Cathy posted via twitter 

"Didn't want to take him back but I did finally! Happy to give them time to get settled in first."

   This was in response to a poster who asked what's the deal with Jill. 

   So everyone seems to be home? 

Maybe they've been home for awhile now, and just getting some time to bond with new baby and recover? That would be great.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ten days does seem a bit long for grandma to keep the grandson.  Hopefully she's been taking him over every day to visit and he's enjoying the attention from grandma and not feeling shoved out.   This is Jill though and she may feel having her son taken care of by someone else is her due.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

Once again, my hand makes exactly that shape when I'm holding my phone in that particular position. And, though it's a really poor quality photo, Jill appears to be holding something in that hand that looks rectangular, dark, and somewhat reflective - suspiciously similar to an iPhone.

That's my theory. I'm going to go ahead and say that I think it's at least as plausible as the theory that she had a stroke or acquired a brain injury during the birth.

 

I agree with the phone. Is Jill left handed or right handed? She's probably holding Sam so she can take a picture with her dominant hand.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Greendoor said:

Man alive that's crazy.  I had my son: at  9.5 cms they gave me an epidural.  He ended up a c-section as I i never got to 10 and it had been hours. 

I got my epi at 9/9.5 cm, too. Progress was super stalled and he was stuck so I guess they figured might as well. It worked.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

32 minutes ago, Flippp said:

 

I agree with the phone. Is Jill left handed or right handed? She's probably holding Sam so she can take a picture with her dominant hand.

That theory doesn't work. Jill is holding SSD with her right hand, which is her dominant one. Only Jinger is left-handed. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Coconut Flan locked this topic

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.



×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.