Joy and Austin: Pikes Peak or Bust?

[Coconut Flan]

Continued from here:

 

[VineHeart137]

Austin looks much more relaxed and natural to me in those honeymoon pics than in the posed People photo or his appearances on Counting On. They look happy. I hope they have a good life together and follow their own path, not necessarily the ones their parents took.

[CoveredInBees]

For just a moment I really thought his parents had named him after a car. 

[ja14]

I'm not sure how to quote a post from the previous thread, but in regards to them camping...

Even if she was deflowered in a hotel room, it would still be really uncomfortable to go camping directly after. You get all sweaty and gross, with no showers around. Then you have to worry about peeing in the woods, or worse! I'm sure she's still nervous about getting  close and personal, so adding those conditions would be terrible!!  I think it's unlikely they are staying in a tent.

Do you think all these fundie couples actually have sex on their wedding night? It must be hard going from a first kiss to that all in one day!

[Audrey2]

I'm a tent camper here. My idea of a great vacation involves staying in a tent and hiking every day. However, I only stay in campgrounds that have showers, as I'm not fond of the idea of getting grubbier and grubbier. Hair removal is also an issue, especially if it's hot and I'm wearing tank tops. If they are camping in a tent, I can see them staying in a campground with showers, like a state park or a KOA.

[FleeJanaFree]

Joys got the 'make time to look adoringly at my headship in a short video' thing down pat. 

[veron1que]

1 hour ago, ja14 said:

Do you think all these fundie couples actually have sex on their wedding night? It must be hard going from a first kiss to that all in one day!

No. I'm sure plenty of them do, but I'm also sure that some of them ease into it. Though, I'm sure it's not long before they do. 

And while yes, they are in a culture where marital rape doesn't exist, I do believe that many of the Fundie men really love their wives and would not push for something if they were uncomfortable. 

[trustworthy]

2 hours ago, ja14 said:

I'm not sure how to quote a post from the previous thread, but in regards to them camping...

Even if she was deflowered in a hotel room, it would still be really uncomfortable to go camping directly after. You get all sweaty and gross, with no showers around. Then you have to worry about peeing in the woods, or worse! I'm sure she's still nervous about getting  close and personal, so adding those conditions would be terrible!!  I think it's unlikely they are staying in a tent.

Do you think all these fundie couples actually have sex on their wedding night? It must be hard going from a first kiss to that all in one day!

I thought of that pre-wedding when it sounded like they were going to camp.  Especially since the Bachelorette party was the first time Joy had gone camping.  Some campers, perhaps especially men, might not think it's a hardship to sleep on the cold ground and go without a shower AND be intimate for the first time. Let's hope she had the gumption to tell him she'd need a shower, or was uncomfortable or whatever.  I had friends who waited until marriage for sex and their honeymoon was tent camping.  They learned real fast it wasn't going to work and so after a couple of days put everything in the back of the truck for padding and slept in there at night.  But they weren't fundie and the woman would have definitely been able to communicate her needs.

In terms of going from 0 - 60 on a wedding night, there's a whole blog of Mormon wedding night disasters which is quite entertaining.  Plenty of folks can't get it to work right away which is why I'm always grateful I don't see traumatized looks on these women in their honeymoon photos.  Let's hope they're not swallowing their misery and keeping sweet.

[snickers34]

2 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

If they are camping in a tent, I can see them staying in a campground with showers, like a state park or a KOA.

Also, most national and state parks or other well known sites have plenty of cabins nearby, ranging in quality/luxury. I can imagine they'd have no problem finding a somewhat more decent place to stay during their honeymoon while still doing outdoors things.

[Daisy0322]

I kind of think Jill and Derek are proof many of them do go straight from hand holding the sex on the wedding night. However, I could see many of them not. I kinda got the vibe that Jessa and Ben may have worked up a little more gradually. Not that I think they waited long but it was clear they were nervous about just kissing even.  Honestly I could see some of the younger guys being really nervous about it and holding off even if they say it's because they think the wives are nervous. 

MY QUESTION though... how many of them don't understand the mechanics of sex and either do it wrong, have to google how, etc. due to tier lack of education the first time.  

[PennySycamore]

Tim and Beverley LaHaye, in their book, The Act of Marriage, said that it would be better if Christian (and therefore virgin) couples would hold of going all the way on their wedding night, but also felt that bit of wisdom was probably not going to be followed so they advised that couples go all the way if they must, but then to spend some time getting to know what each found pleasurable.

[meowfundiecatz]

21 minutes ago, Daisy0322 said:

I kind of think Jill and Derek are proof many of them do go straight from hand holding the sex on the wedding night. However, I could see many of them not. I kinda got the vibe that Jessa and Ben may have worked up a little more gradually. Not that I think they waited long but it was clear they were nervous about just kissing even.  Honestly I could see some of the younger guys being really nervous about it and holding off even if they say it's because they think the wives are nervous. 

MY QUESTION though... how many of them don't understand the mechanics of sex and either do it wrong, have to google how, etc. due to tier lack of education the first time.  

My guess is they are well aware by the time the wedding night occurs if they actually have read the book the Duggars recommend. IIRC (I am about half way through the book), the wedding night should involve intercourse where the man finishes, then a lot of caressing, cuddling, and manual stimulation.

[veron1que]

2 hours ago, Daisy0322 said:

I kind of think Jill and Derek are proof many of them do go straight from hand holding the sex on the wedding night. However, I could see many of them not. I kinda got the vibe that Jessa and Ben may have worked up a little more gradually. Not that I think they waited long but it was clear they were nervous about just kissing even.  Honestly I could see some of the younger guys being really nervous about it and holding off even if they say it's because they think the wives are nervous. 

MY QUESTION though... how many of them don't understand the mechanics of sex and either do it wrong, have to google how, etc. due to tier lack of education the first time.  

Well the duggars and the bates are fairly chatty when it comes to sex occurring in a marital setting. I'm sure all of them receive a wholly uncomfortable sex talk + Christian book on marital intimacy. Joy has also got plenty of married sister to clue her in to the horizontal tango.

 

i think a more common problem is that couples are unsuccessful when attempting penetration. I've read plenty of first hand accounts from people talking about the first time they attempting sex it was too painful and they stopped. I'm sure that happens a lot with fundies where the girls are raised with a lot of sexual shame and fear. 

[Rachel333]

Regarding crying, I hate it when people say that if a woman's crying it must be a form of manipulation. Sure, there probably are some women who do that, but I think the vast majority genuinely can't help it. 

Crying definitely runs in my family on my mom's side. All the women cry very easily. My aunt once cried at a Flintstones episode! I remember several occasions at family gatherings where two aunts were talking to each other and crying and two other aunts started crying just from seeing them. That's just how they react to emotions, both happy and sad.

There was a reddit post a while back where a guy who had a wife who cried at everything decided to write down what made her cry. 

Spoiler

 

[unicorncastle]

3 hours ago, meowfundiecatz said:

My guess is they are well aware by the time the wedding night occurs if they actually have read the book the Duggars recommend. IIRC (I am about half way through the book), the wedding night should involve intercourse where the man finishes, then a lot of caressing, cuddling, and manual stimulation.

What's the name of the book? I'm intrigued. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

1 hour ago, veron1que said:

I kinda got the vibe that Jessa and Ben may have worked up a little more gradually. Not that I think they waited long but it was clear they were nervous about just kissing even.

I'm new here (I've lurked for ages) and recall hearing rumors that Jessa & Ben consummated their marriage in the church. Has anyone debunked (or proved?) that story?

[snickers34]

14 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I'm new here (I've lurked for ages) and recall hearing rumors that Jessa & Ben consummated their marriage in the church. Has anyone debunked (or proved?) that story?

Rumor based on absolutely no evidence. Silly rumors never die on the internets.

[Kangaroo]

17 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I'm new here (I've lurked for ages) and recall hearing rumors that Jessa & Ben consummated their marriage in the church. Has anyone debunked (or proved?) that story?

I don't believe there is any evidence to support that at all. Somebody started a rumour when they left to have their first kiss, they had enough time to quickly consummate as well.

Given that every time a Duggar announces a relationship (courtship or engagement) there is a gossip site posting "that the couple already had sex secretly and are pregnant and the whole family is disappointed!", I'd guess the rumour had no basis in fact at all.

[Coconut Flan]

22 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I'm new here (I've lurked for ages) and recall hearing rumors that Jessa & Ben consummated their marriage in the church. Has anyone debunked (or proved?) that story?

I'm trying to remember what I promised to do if I ever heard that particular bit of nonsense again.  It was a story on a parody blog. 

 

[The Wanderer]

12 minutes ago, Kangaroo said:

Given that every time a Duggar announces a relationship (courtship or engagement) there is a gossip site posting "that the couple already had sex secretly and are pregnant and the whole family is disappointed!", I'd guess the rumour had no basis in fact at all.

Absolutely agree with this! As awful as the Duggars are, their pregnancies pre-marriage are just tabloid fodder.

[Mela99]

Wasn't it Ed Wheat's book they hawked? Intended for Pleasure?

[nst]

joy having sex in a tent with a man she just kissed for the first time is something I don't want to envision. 

let her heal people 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

26 minutes ago, nst said:

joy having sex in a tent with a man she just kissed for the first time is something I don't want to envision. 

let her heal people 

But sex outside under the stars, is amazing. Hopefully they are enjoying getting to know each other physically. As most of us know sex is amazing when BOTH of you get to enjoy it. Hopefully having known him for so long made it a little less awkward for them. But I'm still trying to figure out how you go from sex is filthy dirty disgusting sin, it must never be thought about talked about, done. you can't look at talk to touch a member of the opposite sex until you are courting. But then you can only follow specific rules. And not until the  married these rules must be followed until AFTER you are married.  How do you go from only being able to hold someones hand to putting tab A into slot B in the span of 4 hours?

[meowfundiecatz]

1 hour ago, Mela99 said:

Wasn't it Ed Wheat's book they hawked? Intended for Pleasure?

 

Yes. That's the one.

I had friends (fundie) who tent camped their honeymoon. It worked out for them..

[Jug Band Baby]

11 hours ago, CoveredInBees said:

For just a moment I really thought his parents had named him after a car. 

 

Spoiler

 

I'm convinced they did.  Astin Martin and Austin Martyn are too close for me to believe anything else.