Tickling the Ivories - Jinger and Jeremy Vuolo

[MayMay1123]

5 hours ago, feministxtian said:

 

I was going to quote you, but I just couldn't let those words be put here again. I truly had to go back and check because I knew that the lady in the pics with the adorable grands was just lovely, you are quite pretty! I'm not one to ever lie, or just say something because it's polite...but you are a very fine looking woman! Seriously, get that voice out of your head because it lies...

[feministxtian]

thank you all! you guys are cheaper than therapy...and a whole lot more fun!!!!

[Cheetah]

My hair is fine and totally straight and dark blonde, starting to grey around the temples.  (Actually it started that about 10 years ago and I thought I'd start coloring it if it got much worse, but because I'm blonde it actually looks just like a highlight and didn't start to spread further until recently.  I'm almost 48 and now planning to just go grey naturally unless it looks really uneven at some point).

Anyway... I have to shampoo daily or my scalp feels disgusting and my hair looks limp and oily.  But in CA where I live, it usually dries on its own in about an hour, so my hair-care routine is 5 minute shower with wash and condition, comb out, and that's it.  It's now shoulder length, no bangs, no layers, and has basically been the same cut at different lengths forever (I had it at a chin-length bob for about 6 years and just recently grew it back to shoulder-length again).

On the subject of kids' hair:  my oldest (girl) once let her long, thick hair get so matted in the back that we had to chop it short.  I know someone upthread sounded really upset about parents doing that.  It really had no other options... she'd been swimming a lot with goggles but no cap or ponytail, and the damage to her hair made it break and matt and it was just horrible.  She was 11 at the time and I think the hairstyle she ended up with was a bob so not completely chopped off.  

My youngest (boy) grew his hair long and then got a cut that looked like a ladies' bob... so he and I basically had the same haircut.  (His is also dark blonde and thin).  He liked the length but he hated being mistaken for a girl, so he recently got it cut shorter.  I like it much better now, but I'm trying not to go overboard saying that to him ;-). (He's 12).  

My middle kid (boy) has amazing hair... super thick and a little wavy.  He wears it short in the back and longer in the front and can swoop it to the left or right or back.  It grows really quickly, too.  

[GoddessOfVictory]

I like all this hair discussion, so many different hair care routines!

Growing up, mine was always somewhere between wavy and straight. It would never lie flat but there was no uniform wave to it. Then, in my early twenties, I got it permed and it was the best thing I ever did for my hair. It was almost like the perm finally taught my hair how to curl properly and now, about ten years later, I still have the curly mermaid hair I always dreamed of! I maintain it by washing with shampoo and conditioner every other day, then let it dry while I sleep.
In the morning, if I want to wear it down, I wet it again then scrunch the curls with an old cotton t-shirt, let it air dry, and I 'm good to go. I do, however, have some problems with dryness and frizz (probably from wetting my hair too often or something) and I think it's time I stop being lazy and see if another hair care routine would help me retain moisture.

The second best thing I did for my hair was find a cut that works for it. I finally learned that my hair cannot be cut straight across at the ends, it must be cut in a "U" shape or it looks like crap. Also, I keep my hair long. Currently, it is down to about my waist. I love it this length, it works well with my face shape and I know that if I got it cut short I would end up looking like a man.

Also, in the last few years, strangers have started calling me a redhead, which I thought was weird since I always felt my hair was strawberry blonde, but my hair has gotten darker lately so I guess I'm a ginger now!

[DaniLouisiana]

Welcome to the Ginger Club, @GoddessOfVictory!!! 

I have straight as a warped board hair,meaning if its short enough it has a tiny bit of curl. Its too long for too much of curl now being just to my shoulders or little below-gotta go get it cut soon. I wash it every other day with conditioner between. I could probably go longer but if my hair smells dirty to me, its gettin' wash ed now! I'll probably get it cut in the next 3 weeks, kinda depends on if I run away from home to get away from my DD drama.

[Flossie]

Merely donating DNA and/or use of a womb to a child doesn't always make a man or woman a great parent.  I could give examples from my own upbringing all night long.  My own kids probably have lists featuring me and my ex's boneheaded statements.  But one of my favorite examples is when my father decided to tell me all about how his marriage to my mother blew up.  

It started out OK, with Dad acknowledging that they were too young and didn't know each other well enough to marry, but they both had reasons to want out of their family home (my dad's father was abusive and my mom came from a very large, poor family).  Back in the late 1950's, kids tended to stay in the home until marriage, so Mom and Dad got married.  Soon there was a baby, and then another.  My father tried to start a business that failed and then along came another baby.  

So there was Dad, forgetting his audience when he said "We might have made it with one or two kids, but the third kid was the end.  We just couldn't deal with having a third kid."  Guess who's the third kid?  

My stepmother elbowed him and he realized what he'd just said, but Dad wasn't about to back down.  "Why are you elbowing me?  It's true.  If we hadn't had so many kids, we might have made it.  But three kids were too many.  It was too much.  It killed our marriage.  If there'd been better birth control we'd have stopped at two, but then she turned up pregnant again and it was too much.  I don't see why I have to pretend it didn't make a difference.  Three kids were too many for us, so we got divorced before she could get pregnant again."  

Thanks, Dad.

[BlessaYourHeart]

9 hours ago, GoddessOfVictory said:

I like all this hair discussion, so many different hair care routines!

Growing up, mine was always somewhere between wavy and straight. It would never lie flat but there was no uniform wave to it. Then, in my early twenties, I got it permed and it was the best thing I ever did for my hair. It was almost like the perm finally taught my hair how to curl properly and now, about ten years later, I still have the curly mermaid hair I always dreamed of! I maintain it by washing with shampoo and conditioner every other day, then let it dry while I sleep.
In the morning, if I want to wear it down, I wet it again then scrunch the curls with an old cotton t-shirt, let it air dry, and I 'm good to go. I do, however, have some problems with dryness and frizz (probably from wetting my hair too often or something) and I think it's time I stop being lazy and see if another hair care routine would help me retain moisture.

The second best thing I did for my hair was find a cut that works for it. I finally learned that my hair cannot be cut straight across at the ends, it must be cut in a "U" shape or it looks like crap. Also, I keep my hair long. Currently, it is down to about my waist. I love it this length, it works well with my face shape and I know that if I got it cut short I would end up looking like a man.

Also, in the last few years, strangers have started calling me a redhead, which I thought was weird since I always felt my hair was strawberry blonde, but my hair has gotten darker lately so I guess I'm a ginger now!

 Try using an Argan oil spray after washing! My thick curly hair used to always go dry and frizz but I started using a Treseme argan oil spray on wet hair after I wash it and it has worked wonders! 

[anotherone]

4 hours ago, Flossie said:

So there was Dad, forgetting his audience when he said "We might have made it with one or two kids, but the third kid was the end.  We just couldn't deal with having a third kid."  Guess who's the third kid?  

 

I know I'm more distant from the situation than you (obviously), but I'm hearing it a little differently. I hear him simply saying that the sheer number and cost is just too much for a young family without a good financial support system.  I don't hear him at all saying it was anything personal about you, you just happened to be third.  People sometimes tell their kids they're an "accident" baby but they still love them to death and once they're born they would have never had it any other way.  My mother would sometimes talk about how exhausting it was raising all of us as babies and toddlers (one after another, barely a year apart). I mean, we knew it was true, we were there! Most of it by herself. We never took it as she didn't love any one of us. We understood that yes, babies are hard and a very difficult stress on marriage.   I'm thinking that's what your dad meant, because I see the subject of his conversation as his relationship between her and him, not between, him and the kids. He was probably just trying to justify the demise of the marriage.  Yes, he could have been more tactful, men do sometimes just focus on facts and not emotions,  but I'll really bet he meant nothing at all about you.

I hope you don't end up feeling too bad about what he said.  Maybe a conversation with your stepmother could help clear it up.

[GoddessOfVictory]

10 hours ago, BlessaYourHeart said:

 Try using an Argan oil spray after washing! My thick curly hair used to always go dry and frizz but I started using a Treseme argan oil spray on wet hair after I wash it and it has worked wonders! 

Thanks for the tip! I'll have to try that out!

[Shadoewolf]

Ehh the Argon oil can leave it greasy, use smll amounts until you know how your hair absorbs it.

 

[Nashville92]

Can I get some advice for thin hair? I have it bad both ways-my hair is painfully thin and extremely curly.  Not like gorgeous Shirley Temple curls but more like a rat's nest.  I've used Nixon but I'm not sure it's genetics or what that keeps my hair thin.  I do color from time to time-I do have a few Grey's at 27 lol

Edited to add my hair is long, I wish I could get is as long as Jessa but that's doubtful 

[Gobsmacked]

On 21 January 2017 at 2:51 AM, anotherone said:

My grandmother said that when she was young she had beautiful long hair but her mother made them wash their hair with Fels Naptha.  If you know what that is, you'd be as horrified as me because that stuff is so harsh. I rarely see it around anymore (she was a teen around 1920) but it is this strong laundry soap.  Apparently gentler soaps in the liquid form weren't around at that time.

My Nana ( born in 1908) used to, as a teen, wash her hair using homemade soap. That's really all that was available then unless your family was wealthy.

Nana  and her sisters used rain water collected in a barrel. Rain water was softer than tap water.

They rinsed their hair using vinegar in the final rinse to make their hair shiny.

They made a conditioner using egg white and beer! It does work, Nana used it on me once when I was 12. Smells odd though!

They all struggled with greasy hair in their teen years. A family failing passed to me sadly.

It must have been very difficult to keep hair clean and shiny before the advent of the array of hair care products available today.

 

[PennySycamore]

With all this talk of hair care and routines, I just have to say "You're fired!" to my stylist.  I've gotten two really lousy haircuts in a row.  She left it too long in November and cut it too short this time.  I wanted it to the bottom of my earrings.  Yes, I wanted it short, but it's too short and it's uneven.  I'm stuck wearing a bandanna for a few weeks to it grows out enough to get cut again.  Yep, it's that bad!  This haircut is a vivid reminder if why I wore my hair long and up or braided for 20 years.

[elliha]

4 hours ago, Gobsmacked said:

My Nana ( born in 1908) used to, as a teen, wash her hair using homemade soap. That's really all that was available then unless your family was wealthy.

Nana  and her sisters used rain water collected in a barrel. Rain water was softer than tap water.

They rinsed their hair using vinegar in the final rinse to make their hair shiny.

They made a conditioner using egg white and beer! It does work, Nana used it on me once when I was 12. Smells odd though!

They all struggled with greasy hair in their teen years. A family failing passed to me sadly.

It must have been very difficult to keep hair clean and shiny before the advent of the array of hair care products available today.

 

It was hard for everyone to wash their hair for sure but shiny hair wasn't expected the same way, it was more a lucky genetic fluke. 

[Georgiana]

17 minutes ago, elliha said:

It was hard for everyone to wash their hair for sure but shiny hair wasn't expected the same way, it was more a lucky genetic fluke. 

Also, hair was more likely (almost certain) to be styled.  Unwashed hair is actually better for styling, especially if you want it to look smooth/stay put.  I pull my hair back into twists/braids/bun styles frequently, and while my hair would look greasy and gross left down after a few days without washing, it looks perfectly fine when styled.

[AlternativeVoice]

Longtime lurker here, about a year now, first post & it's just an observation from the Jinger wedding episode, completely off topic from the hair stuff, but I swear she looks a whole lot like Kate Middleton!  Especially in her dress! Did anyone else catch that or was it just me? 

[seraaa]

4 hours ago, AlternativeVoice said:

Longtime lurker here, about a year now, first post & it's just an observation from the Jinger wedding episode, completely off topic from the hair stuff, but I swear she looks a whole lot like Kate Middleton!  Especially in her dress! Did anyone else catch that or was it just me? 

I can see it

Welcome out of lurkerdom

[Stormy]

Since this season's geared up to be all about Jinger, has anyone heard a peep from her in response to episode feedback? I know it's probably a good thing she's been so private since she married Jeremy, but it's still really strange for a Duggar.

[xlurker]

19 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

With all this talk of hair care and routines, I just have to say "You're fired!" to my stylist.  I've gotten two really lousy haircuts in a row.  She left it too long in November and cut it too short this time.  I wanted it to the bottom of my earrings.  Yes, I wanted it short, but it's too short and it's uneven.  I'm stuck wearing a bandanna for a few weeks to it grows out enough to get cut again.  Yep, it's that bad!  This haircut is a vivid reminder if why I wore my hair long and up or braided for 20 years.

Just an FYI, I dont know if you are cutting your hair in a bob like style (little or no layers) but if you are ALWAYS have hairdresser go over it dry.  Meaning dry it without styling (bobs should be pretty low maintainance) because you will never get it straight if you dont go over dry.  The goal is for hair to appear cut staight when dry, and with hairlines and cowlicks and weird little curls you can never get it perfect wet.   I'm sorry you've had that experience. 

[AlternativeVoice]

1 hour ago, seraaa said:

I can see it

Welcome out of lurkerdom

Thanks! Glad I'm not the only one.

[Sobeknofret]

On 01/05/2017 at 8:35 PM, Stormy said:

Did it...not take? Or something? I know vasectomies can fail, but can this happen?...

Late to the party, as usual for me, but my OB-GYN got a surprise addition to her family when her tubal failed.

[MoonFace]

On 1/21/2017 at 1:10 PM, feministxtian said:

I've always been told that I'm not attractive...my father's favorite "joke" was "we went to the hospital to get a baby but all we could afford was a 'thing' called Caroline". Yeah..that'll fuck you up as a kid. So, I've accepted that I'm butt-ass ugly and that's that. 

 

 

Sorry - but what an ass.  

I grew up with a "joker' too.    They pass off mean, hurtful comments as 'jokes' on others but would never put up with that $hit if it were aimed at them.  

[PennySycamore]

@xlurker, I get it cut dry because that's usually the best way to cut curly hair.  I say usually because I did have one stylist, Peter, who cut it wet. He gave me a fabulous cut, but he was a genius!  My current -soon to be ex-stylist is no genius.

[ChairmanMeow]

On 21 January 2017 at 6:08 AM, Scrabblemaster said:

I barely know women older than a certain age, about 40, who have longer hair. I have the impression the older women get the shorter get their hair.  I have always wondered what i will do after i have crossed this invisible age line. 

I am in my early thirties and I will NEVER EVER EVER EVER have short hair. I intend to keep my hair long and colored until the day I die. Short hair to me is anything shorter than bra-strap length.

Incidentally, my mum is in her late fifties and her hair is mid-back length.

This is a topic close to my heart, as I lost my beautiful waist length hair and it is taking forever to grow back to its previous length. It honestly makes me cry.

2 hours ago, MoonFace said:

Sorry - but what an ass.  

I grew up with a "joker' too.    They pass off mean, hurtful comments as 'jokes' on others but would never put up with that $hit if it were aimed at them.  

That is awful! I am so sorry for you both. Who says that to anyone even as a joke? Especially a child at that!

[xlurker]

@PennySycamore  I Love male hairdressers!  And he prob cut it wet because he understood curly hair bounces/ shrinks ALOT!  LOL  Dont understand why so many hairdressers can't get that thru their heads   Can always take a bit more off, but can't put it back on