Lori Alexander, 12: Transformed, But We Can't Tell

[feministxtian]

I think I can say with some certainty that my Mister is NOT particularly interested in "the scenery" when we go out...but then again this is the man who thinks my 52 year old, 5'5", 220lb, no assed self is just FINE with him...make that I'm not too sure about him sometimes....

And yes, my favorite pants are yoga pants or leggings. I have a belly full of stretch marks (thank you #1 kid) and "regular pants" can actually hurt...so I wear comfortable pants with a tunic top...he thinks I look fine...but see above.

 

[Imrlgoddess]

Sooooo hang on.  If men looking at other women benefits the guy and his willing mate....then shouldn't the scantily clad women get a pass?  Granted there's the whole "men think about sex every single minute of every single day" spiel, but they get an added visual from the yoga pant wearing ladies....so what I'm gathering is this:

The immodest women are actually strengthening the marriage bed by providing men with fodder with which to pounce their more than willing wives and create holy soldiers.  Ergo, immodest women HELP the Godly marriage.  So there must be a certain number of Mary Magdalene's out there to accommodate the Madonna's.  

 

[polecat]

1 hour ago, Koala said:

I am shocked that Lori couldn't get behind a breast reduction.  

According to her, she's always been small, and has never had any trouble luring men.  She also seems to be of the opinion that larger breasts just aren't as "pretty" after you age.

On the other hand, she seems positively baffled that women carrying the BRCA gene would opt for a mastectomy instead of just eating vegetables.

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/05/cutting-off-your-breasts.html

Lori Alexander: Thinker of Thoughts

 

Why does it NOT surprise me that Lori judges women who have big breasts? I have always been busty and got even bustier AFTER breastfeeding (which usually seems to have the opposite effect?). Mine aren't particularly hangy-down at this point in my life -- my 40s -- but sure, they'll probably get pretty hangy at some point. And? At least I don't have a hateful attitude. I can deal with a cleavage full of belly button as long as I never ever ever act like Lori.

(I'll bet all of those ex bfs of Lori are thanking their lucky stars they didn't actually get stuck with her nasty self).

[SilverBeach]

21 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

A former FJer said that she emailed Lori about writing errors. She said that Lori wrote back saying something that she was a math teacher and that writing and English weren't her strong subjects.

Too + Too = Fore huh Lori? Dumb pompous ass.

[Granwych]

8 hours ago, molecule said:

 She's horrible, but I think she  believes whatever she is saying at the moment (even if it contradicts what she said three sentences before).

I wonder when she last had a cranial MRI.  Brain tumors, benign or malignant, can really mess with a person's thought processes.

[Loveday]

28 minutes ago, Granwych said:

I wonder when she last had a cranial MRI.  Brain tumors, benign or malignant, can really mess with a person's thought processes.

True, but I think in Lori's case, her thought processes were unfortunately messed up long before her first brain tumor ever appeared. 

[FundieWatcher]

Some of the things Lori writes...somehow they are both the truth and also not true at the same time.

Like "fruits and vegetables  lower your risk of cancer." True. But it isn't a complete picture. And there is so much information missing that it actually becomes untrue the way she presents it. "Fruits and vegetables  lower your risk of cancer" is an article title- not the whole story. Her oversimplification is pathetic. And her ego? She really thinks she knows more than researchers who have devoted their lives to cancer research? She really thinks she should give out medical advice for hypothetical situations? 

[mango_fandango]

7 hours ago, jerkit said:

Because women can totally determine the size of their breasts by shear will

I must, I must, I must increase my bust!

[Koala]

I have been wondering if Lori has even read the books she's trashing (Jesus Calling & The 5 Love Languages).

I noticed last week when she posted her Jesus Calling notebook scribbles, that a couple of things she said made it seem like she'd never read the book herself.

Quote

You want to read someone's words that don't think the Bible is sufficient? I sure don't.

Quote

I could care less about her testimony.

Then in the comments of The 5 Love Languages post, she made the following comment to a reader who had a positive review of the book:

Quote

I don’t know if the author of the book made it clear that it’s purpose was only to use as a guideline to help the person reading it to learn how to love their spouse more and not how to get their spouse to love them the way they want to be loved. I sure hope he did.

That doesn't sound like she's read the book at all.
What an irony it would be if Lori is screaming from the rooftops about 2 books she's never read.

[Emilycharlotte]

And we are back to the topic of yoga pants as a sign of rebellion, wickedness and societal breakdown--which quickly devolves into a contest as to which commenter is most offended by these devil-pants, which leads to the idea that wanting to be comfortably dressed is a sin unto itself, and then to mean-spirited comments about sightings of heavy women in stretch pants. Basically, if you look good in yoga pants, you are sinning by causing men to have lustful thoughts.  If you look bad in yoga pants,  you are sinning because...I don't know. Is it a sin to cause women to have petty, unkind thoughts and then post them on social media?

I have a new theory that this kind of petty, silly, ugly, extra-Biblical crap is a natural result of trying to find new ways to cover the same 3 topics over and over and over again.  But I am wearing yoga pants right now, so what do I know? 

[freealljs]

So Ken, in his wall o' text, wrote this:

"I am working with three godly good guys right now whose wives are nothing but a set of one moving excuse after another. They have tried doing all they can to meet the excuses and resolve them, but then the excuse changes. They have tried standing up to their wives and calling them out when they don’t live up to their values. No matter what they do they only find a wife running back to her excuses, because really, she does not want a connected marriage, no matter how much she thinks she does. "

I'm assuming it's Ken Alexander, who thinks molestation and incest are normal.

Good going Ken, calling out those three godly guys. Did they or their wives like reading negative things about themselves?  Just put out their dirty laundry. Given how small his company is, and the business he does, I bet that it won't be hard for those three guys to know it's about them. What a douche.

ETA: I love yoga pants, and I wear workout clothes to buy groceries. In Lorken world, I will make men stumble. Hahaha. I don't wear plunging necklines, so I'm not modest like Lori. Hahaha

[Lurky]

23 hours ago, Imrlgoddess said:

Sooooo hang on.  If men looking at other women benefits the guy and his willing mate....then shouldn't the scantily clad women get a pass?  Granted there's the whole "men think about sex every single minute of every single day" spiel, but they get an added visual from the yoga pant wearing ladies....so what I'm gathering is this:

The immodest women are actually strengthening the marriage bed by providing men with fodder with which to pounce their more than willing wives and create holy soldiers.  Ergo, immodest women HELP the Godly marriage.  So there must be a certain number of Mary Magdalene's out there to accommodate the Madonna's.  

 

Yes, this, exactly!

I am reading and re-reading the comment @Koala quoted upthread, and I'm baffled at Lori's translation of it.

Quote

I’m not blind. I see attractive women all the time and I don’t want them AT ALL. I want my wife. She’s 50, has had and raised five kids and it shows. It has not diminished my desire for her and her alone in the least.  The curious thing is that exposure to a highly sexualized society does not make me want “sex” more and it certainly doesn't make me want that sexy woman in the commercial, it makes me want HER more. She cannot comprehend this.

In Lori-land, this man is saying he sees other beautiful women, and he wants his wife, because he's aroused by other women, because sex is this physical appetite to slake, so it's lucky there are sexy things to look at to keep his appetite whetted after all these years. 

I read it as the man saying that sex isn't just physical to him, it's an expression of the couple's love for each other, and while there are sexualised images all around him (and women who are physically sexier than his wife), he would much rather make love with his wife, because of their love and connection and history, than have sex with the hot young woman in the advert. *

It's beyond sad that Lori has never known this kind of relationship, and so the idea of sex as mutual pleasure, let alone as an act of companionship and love, is so alien.

(* I was slightly worried she could be quoting Cabinetman again, and I'm inadvertently praising him.  But no, that doesn't sound like him at all!)

[EmiGirl]

Maybe Lori's pissed because every time Ken sees a woman in yoga pants she has to give him 10 minutes and lube.

[Loveday]

3 minutes ago, EmiGirl said:

Maybe Lori's pissed because every time Ken sees a woman in yoga pants she has to give him 10 minutes and lube.

  I think we have a winner here. 

[Imrlgoddess]

I found this particular blog post poignant with Madame and her hangups.  It's the 3rd in a series but it really hits the nail on the head with Lori, given her age and time frames in which she's lived.  

https://homeschoolersanonymous.org/2016/10/26/never-a-helpmeet-part-3-patriarchy-what-happened-to-it/

[desertvixen]

9 hours ago, Lurky said:

I read it as the man saying that sex isn't just physical to him, it's an expression of the couple's love for each other, and while there are sexualised images all around him (and women who are physically sexier than his wife), he would much rather make love with his wife, because of their love and connection and history, than have sex with the hot young woman in the advert. *

I agree with you on this one.  And yes, it is sad that Lori doesn't get this.

[Koala]

This special snowflake's response to the yoga pants post is priceless:

Quote

I actually had to Google yoga pants because I didn’t know what they looked like. Well when I saw the pictures I wanted to run from the screen screaming “The horror! The horror!” I can’t believe how any self respecting woman can wear something so hideous!
It’s so sad to see such rebellion and how it must hurt our Lord.

Starving children, people suffering from cancer, domestic violence...all of these things are happening as I type.  And what does this lady think the Lord is worried about?  Yoga pants.   

 

[Granwych]

No wonder she's always tired,  And probably sore as hell.

12 hours ago, EmiGirl said:

Maybe Lori's pissed because every time Ken sees a woman in yoga pants she has to give him 10 minutes and lube.

She could just give Ken the tube of KY and let him take care of himself.

[Lurky]

Re the terrible scourge of yoga pants, I read this and thought of all of you..

https://www.buzzfeed.com/fionarutherford/a-man-told-women-not-to-wear-yoga-pants-so-they-paraded-outs

[polecat]

9 hours ago, Koala said:

I actually had to Google yoga pants because I didn’t know what they looked like. Well when I saw the pictures I wanted to run from the screen screaming “The horror! The horror!” I can’t believe how any self respecting woman can wear something so hideous!
It’s so sad to see such rebellion and how it must hurt our Lord.

 

(again, Koala didn't say this but one of Lori's minions of evil) -- Golly, this takes me back to my fundy youth. It was such a THING, the competitive fundyness. Who could out-innocent the others, who could out-holy other people -- each woman was just so desperate trying to be more godly than all the rest! It just got utterly nonsensical. My mom would insist that she'd never even HEARD of "that Madonna lady. Who is she? Some Catholic nun like Mother Theresa or something? We're not Catholics, so we're not really familiar with her," (she'd say with this pruned-up mouth). Okay, mom, yes, it's the 80s, and sure, we don't listen to pop music or anything other than hymns, but I can guaran-freaking-tee she knew exactly who Madonna was. We did not live under a rock. 

If what causes this idiot to scream "The horror, the horror!" is a freaking pair of pants, she needs to get over herself and start paying attention to what is actually happening in the world. But of course, it isn't. She could care less about a pair of pants. She's just trying to out-fundy the rest of those ninnies. 

[Koala]

I don't even know where to start with her latest post.  She lists 11 things feminism has given us (suspiciously, she leaves out voting- guess she's not going to mess with that one again) and gives them the "points" she thinks they deserve.

Lori basically says that feminism hasn't benefited her personally, so she doesn't care about it and God probably doesn't either.  

Quote

Feminists get a few points for things I don’t care about at all and I am sure God doesn’t care about any of these things. 

Quick break down:

Open a bank account- She's okay with that, but brags that she didn't need it because she's always had her daddy and Ken to support her.

Jury Duty- She doesn't want to do it because HOME, so why would anyone else?

Practice Law- I'll just quote The Queen of Arguing on this one:

Quote

Besides, being a lawyer makes women much less feminine because they have to be argumentative and loud to state their case.

Good thing being a blogger and a book writer doesn't make women into argumentative shrews.

Birth Control Pills- Murder in a prescription bottle, causer of sexual immorality. Enough said?

Maternity Leave- Terrible for society.  Women should either stay home like Lori, or hop up off the delivery table and haul their harlot asses back to work. 

Breastfeed in Public- If you are absolutely, positively sure that Ken doesn't catch a glimpse of your breasts, you're okay.  If Ken catches a glimpse it's not okay.  Just depends.  Besides, you might have large breasts, and as Lori told us the other day, larger breasts just aren't "pretty".

Attend Ivy League Universities- They're anti-god, so that's a big NO.

Attend a military academy-  War is for men only, because Bible.

Run the Boston Marathon- Again, I'll just quote her on this

Quote

 for Christian women to spend so much time in preparing for this seems a waste of time to me

Serve in combat- I will quote her.  Remember Lori, you are writing about women who have fought for our country, so that you can have the freedom to sit on the internet and whine about the privileges you have.

Quote

Blech! To me, this is wicked, especially since they are thinking about drafting women. Thanks a lot, feminists. Multiple negative points on this one.

Become an astronaut- She's baffled that any woman would want to do this- after all, she isn't interested in it, but whatever.

She continues:

Quote

Did you notice at the beginning of the article, the author said, “seeing the things my mother and grandmother were forced to endure.” It’s as if women were beaten, stoned, and treated like slaves before feminism came on the scene.

Quote

They also claimed that a wife was “legally classified as ‘subordinate’ to her husband.” Wives being under the authority of their husbands is a good thing since all of God’s commands for us are the best for us. 

In conclusion:

Quote

Stop listening to the lies of feminism and the supposed “triumphs” they have gained. They have only gained them because men have let them. It’s nothing they could have done without men stepping aside and allowing it. 

 

[Loveday]

Serve on a jury? Well, damn all feminists for making us wimmenz do our civic duty. 

And I'm pretty sure women were 'allowed' to open bank accounts before feminism reared its ugly head. My great- grandmother had one of her own as far back as the 30s and 40s. She was divorced (yes, Lori, divorced, in the 1930s), what was she supposed to do, keep her money in an old coffee tin on top of the icebox?

 

[Imrlgoddess]

You're welcome Lori. You're welcome for having a public female voice in a free country. You're welcome for the grocery options you very clearly enjoy. You're welcome to have had as many children as you wanted without confines.  You're welcome for the freedom to bitch about politics & your government. You're welcome to your free choice of religion & the right to spread your views as far as you like. 

Signed,

LCpl Imrlgoddess 

USMC '01-'05

[Loveday]

Just now, Imrlgoddess said:

You're welcome Lori. You're welcome for having a public female voice in a free country. You're welcome for the grocery options you very clearly enjoy. You're welcome to have had as many children as you wanted without confines.  You're welcome for the freedom to bitch about politics & your government. You're welcome to your free choice of religion & the right to spread your views as far as you like. 

Signed,

LCpl Imrlgoddess 

USMC '01-'05

Thank you. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Lori seems to forget that hundreds of thousand of women served in the military during WWI, WWII, Korea and Vietnam. Much of that service was pre "feminism".  Not combat but just as important and sometimes just as dangerous/ deadly.

During WWII women on the home front took over "men"s" jobs in factories to build the planes and tanks and guns and bombs needed to win the war. They pinned up their hair and wore pants or overalls and got the jobs done that needed to be done.  Not doing your part for the war effort was considered helping the enemy.

Would Lori have told those women to stay home and keep sweet and feminine and modest and discreet? Yeah, she probably would have.