Flash back Friday

[JMO]

Youtube randomly suggested this clip to me.  If you watch from 2:40-3:20 mins it shows how Michaella got to be CinderJana for Erin's wedding and sew all the bridesmaids dresses last minute after her sisters decided they hated them.  Even Jana thought the amount of effort Michael had to put in was crazy.  But I guess it's that servant' heart. 

 

[theinvisiblegirl]

If only Jana was psychic so she could have known that that was in her future!

[doubleT]

I got sucked in and watched a few more youtubes of this eposide. 

Interesting how Derick wasn't even in the picture during Erin's wedding.  

Boob and DQ sure were pushing Jessa and Ben. 

They were treating Jessa like a bride in training. 

I had forgotten how irritating Jill was. 

[CreationMuseumCurator]

I, too, got sucked into the rest of the episode. It's been a while since I've watched 19KAC. I'd forgotten how snotty Jessa was in this episode. I also forgot how much Michelle's speeches about courtship superiority grind my nerves. Jill pales in comparison next to those two.

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, doubleT said:

I got sucked in and watched a few more youtubes of this eposide. 

Interesting how Derick wasn't even in the picture during Erin's wedding.  

Boob and DQ sure were pushing Jessa and Ben. 

They were treating Jessa like a bride in training. 

I had forgotten how irritating Jill was. 

If I remember right, he would have already been in the picture because the Dills were engaged and married about six or seven months after this (late June 2014.) He wasn't publicly in the picture because they were able to keep it much quieter than the holy Benessa union - likely because HippieJesus was still harassing people in Nepal at the time the Paines got married.

[doubleT]

18 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

If I remember right, he would have already been in the picture because the Dills were engaged and married about six or seven months after this (late June 2014.) He wasn't publicly in the picture because they were able to keep it much quieter than the holy Benessa union - likely because HippieJesus was still harassing people in Nepal at the time the Paines got married.

He and Jill were likely Skyping, but I don't think she went to Nepal to meet him until after Thanksgiving.   But, the Duggar's weren't going on and on about Jill talking to someone that she was interested in getting to know better or anything at that time.  They only focused on Jessa ... the one who was courting ... as a bride ... getting married soon, etc. 

[boston2495]

Ah, Erin's wedding, fun times. I always found it super intriguing that Michael wasn't in it. I remember reading on Kelly's blog that she'd been asked but said no because she prefers more behind the scenes roles or whatever. But then she did agree to be in Alyssa's wedding not long after. I always wondered what the deal was with that. Maybe she didn't want to be filmed as much, what with TLC being there?

[GoddessOfVictory]

2 hours ago, boston2495 said:

Ah, Erin's wedding, fun times. I always found it super intriguing that Michael wasn't in it. I remember reading on Kelly's blog that she'd been asked but said no because she prefers more behind the scenes roles or whatever. But then she did agree to be in Alyssa's wedding not long after. I always wondered what the deal was with that. Maybe she didn't want to be filmed as much, what with TLC being there?

I always thought it was because her crush, Brandon, was also in Alyssa's wedding. I think he was an usher or something. What a perfect excuse to be near him.

[EmainMacha]

@boston2495 I remember the comments on the blog asking why she wasn't and that was the excuse Kelly gave. There were loads of comments about it!

But then I thought Michael changed her mind at the last minute and was in Erin's wedding after all? Maybe I'm mixing it up with Alyssa's wedding. Too much pointless Bates information rolling round my brain.

[boston2495]

@GoddessOfVictory that might explain it! I've definitely read somewhere that Alyssa tried to get them together via her wedding, so that could make sense. Still super unusual though, I can't even imagine saying no to being in my own sister's wedding! Apparently she also declined being in Whitney's too, according to Kelly's blog comment. 

 

@EmainMacha from the pics it doesn't look like she's wearing the same dress as the sisters, but I haven't gotten around to lookijg at the wedding video or anything so who knows? Haha I too have way too much pointless Bates info in my head...

[EmainMacha]

@boston2495 I went back and checked the blog. Michael wasn't in the wedding proper but ended up having to walk down the aisle with them as Callie the flower girl wouldn't walk down it without her.

Sisterhood of the pointless Bates info!

[boston2495]

8 hours ago, EmainMacha said:

@boston2495 I went back and checked the blog. Michael wasn't in the wedding proper but ended up having to walk down the aisle with them as Callie the flower girl wouldn't walk down it without her.

Sisterhood of the pointless Bates info!

LMAO seriously! Why can't this knowledge be something we could put to good use in the real world? 

I still can't wrap my head around it though! Maybe it's just that my sisters and I are sooo close that it'd be unthinkable that anyone would say no to something as important as being in a wedding...but I'm clearly biased! It's just that these big fundie families love to paint the portrait of "all our kids are each other's VERY best friends, isn't it fantastic?!" So when little things that this pop up I find it really fascinating in a totally nosy sense. Like how both Michael and Alyssa each didn't have one of their eleventy sisters as their maid of honor. Makes you wonder what's really going on behind the lovely facade of Kelly's blog.  

[doubleT]

Michael was probably exhausted after having to sew all the bridesmaid dresses in a couple of weeks time.  She probably declined being in the wedding so she wouldn't have to sew another dress for herself.  Haha. 

Also, we didn't know it then, but her and Brandon were an item at that time.  (Unrevealed to us but he had already been around awhile.)  Supposedly, her part in the wedding was to watch all the littles and Brandon helped her!  So there was her motivation. 

I do think it is weird that Erin wouldn't have asked Michael and Michael wouldn't have felt honored to be in Erin's wedding.  I would have thought they would have been close, being the two oldest girls.  Kelly said at the time that Michael was too shy.  But wow, just 1-1/2 years later, Michael carried the show during her own courtship/engagement/wedding season.  She didn't seem shy to me at all. 

So, I agree with @boston2495, make me also wonder what's really going on behind the scenes. 

[actuallyjessica]

I've never really been under the impression that Michael and Erin particularly like each other. Same for Alyssa.

However, it really is plausible that Michael was too shy to be in the bridal party - she has definitely come out of her shell since getting with Brandon.

That was also the case for me - I had little social confidence before my DH came along and probably would've declined being in somebody's wedding party, especially if I knew there would be over 1000+ eyes on me (if only for a moment, till the bride made her entrance).

[EmainMacha]

My mum had 7 sisters and for her wedding she had one sister and a friend as attendants. She said it was hard to choose from all the sisters because someone would feel left out so she chose one that hadn't been a bridesmaid yet. That said some of her sisters lived away and it wouldn't have been practical for them to be involved. My dad had 8 sisters and none of them were in the wedding party.

Both my parents came from big families and no matter what Kelly (and sometimes my mum) says it isn't a case of everyone being best friends. There are definite closer siblings in both sides of our families and siblings who tolerate each other because they're family. But to ever talk about that fact outside the family would be a total no-go because family business stays in the family.

[luxfilia]

On June 25, 2016 at 10:00 PM, boston2495 said:

LMAO seriously! Why can't this knowledge be something we could put to good use in the real world? 

I still can't wrap my head around it though! Maybe it's just that my sisters and I are sooo close that it'd be unthinkable that anyone would say no to something as important as being in a wedding...but I'm clearly biased! It's just that these big fundie families love to paint the portrait of "all our kids are each other's VERY best friends, isn't it fantastic?!" So when little things that this pop up I find it really fascinating in a totally nosy sense. Like how both Michael and Alyssa each didn't have one of their eleventy sisters as their maid of honor. Makes you wonder what's really going on behind the lovely facade of Kelly's blog.  

Totally agree except for the maid of honor thing. I have two sisters and we've all three always agreed that we would pick a friend as the MOH, but have had each other as bridesmaids. That way there's no favoritism/picking one sister over the other.

[RosyDaisy]

I had 2 bridesmaids...my 2 nieces. The oldest was my MOH. My sister had the special honor of MOTB duties.

[manda b]

My brother was my MOH and my husband's brother was his best man. Our wedding was real small, maybe 15 people total.

[tumblr]

I just got engaged and I amazed by how many friends have asked me if they are going to be in my wedding party point blank. It feels extremely rude to me every time people bring it up and then I feel like an ass when I explain that I'm not having a wedding party. 

Wedding parties are personal and are decided by a lot more factors than just who a bride or groom is emotionally closest to.

[CorruptionInc.]

On 6/30/2016 at 3:42 AM, tumblr said:

I just got engaged and I amazed by how many friends have asked me if they are going to be in my wedding party point blank. It feels extremely rude to me every time people bring it up and then I feel like an ass when I explain that I'm not having a wedding party. 

Wedding parties are personal and are decided by a lot more factors than just who a bride or groom is emotionally closest to.

 

Congratulations!!!

Secondly, you are right, them asking that is SO rude - I never have ever heard of anyone thinking to ask!

I've heard of "oh I have to have so and so in my wedding party otherwise she/he'll get upset" but that is it.

[princessmahina]

On 6/29/2016 at 0:42 PM, tumblr said:

I just got engaged and I amazed by how many friends have asked me if they are going to be in my wedding party point blank. It feels extremely rude to me every time people bring it up and then I feel like an ass when I explain that I'm not having a wedding party. 

Wedding parties are personal and are decided by a lot more factors than just who a bride or groom is emotionally closest to.

I don't want to have a wedding party either at my someday wedding. Are you going to have a maid of honor? It seems like it's mandatory (who else would hold the bouquet during the vows?) but I don't have any friends that I consider close enough to ask and I doubt I'll make any in the next year or two. 

Not trying to be rude, just curious how it's going to work, since I want something like that myself.

[sophie10130]

2 hours ago, princessmahina said:

I don't want to have a wedding party either at my someday wedding. Are you going to have a maid of honor? It seems like it's mandatory (who else would hold the bouquet during the vows?) but I don't have any friends that I consider close enough to ask and I doubt I'll make any in the next year or two. 

Not trying to be rude, just curious how it's going to work, since I want something like that myself.

I didn't have a wedding party at my very small wedding. It was my immediate family and their significant others and my husband's immediate family and a best friend that is more like family. It was just the two of us and the pastor up front. We ambled around in the church for a while before the actual ceremony and I didn't walk down the aisle and there was no music. I just gave my bouquet to my mom who was sitting in the front row. It was EXTREMELY trimmed down because we wanted to get married by a judge, but it was a holiday weekend and my husband was leaving for a few months due to the military. The pastor was a family friend and doing us a favor! It was perfect though.

I didn't miss any of the traditions, which I was surprised about, and then we had a bangin party the next day and I wore my dress to that too. 

[tumblr]

19 hours ago, princessmahina said:

I don't want to have a wedding party either at my someday wedding. Are you going to have a maid of honor? It seems like it's mandatory (who else would hold the bouquet during the vows?) but I don't have any friends that I consider close enough to ask and I doubt I'll make any in the next year or two. 

Not trying to be rude, just curious how it's going to work, since I want something like that myself.

We're eloping, we are both on the young side and want to focus on saving money for a house. We also have to added situation of my family disowning me as soon as they find out I am marrying a woman making it so I wouldn't really have more than a handful to invite anyways. 

You could always purposefully plan to have a table hold your bouquet. Or not have a bouquet. Or hand it to whoever gives you away if you are doing that! 

[LadyCrow1313]

19 hours ago, CorruptionInc. said:

Congratulations!!!

Secondly, you are right, them asking that is SO rude - I never have ever heard of anyone thinking to ask!

I've heard of "oh I have to have so and so in my wedding party otherwise she/he'll get upset" but that is it.

A friend got married for the first time many moons ago, & she asked me to be her MOH. I thought she was going to ask another friend (that she was also close to); when I asked about the other friend doing so instead of me, she (bride) got angry with me (not sure why, as I thought this was a genuine question; otherwise I'd have been happy to do it; maybe this was an inappropriate question?). Needless to say, the other friend became the MOH (which was fine with me), and I went to the wedding.

Maybe I'm just not up on all the proper social graces/behaviors when it comes to such things. :: shrugs ::

(On a side note, of the three weddings that I was a MOH in, two out of the three couples have since divorced. Maybe I'm toxic to being an active part of a wedding.)

[princessmahina]

3 hours ago, tumblr said:

We're eloping, we are both on the young side and want to focus on saving money for a house. We also have to added situation of my family disowning me as soon as they find out I am marrying a woman making it so I wouldn't really have more than a handful to invite anyways. 

You could always purposefully plan to have a table hold your bouquet. Or not have a bouquet. Or hand it to whoever gives you away if you are doing that! 

I don't think they'd let me have a table up there-- I'd be getting married in a Catholic church-- and I'm iffy on the "giving away thing." My inner feminist rails at the idea of being "given away" by my father like I'm chattel.  Those are really good suggestions though.

Or maybe I'm just reading too much into it and I should suck it up and do it anyway lol.