Lori Alexander- the Mindless Mentor: Part 8

[TeddyBonkers]

I just recently discovered that my mom's mom never graduated from high school. She also didn't speak English until she started kindergarten. Anywho, she was widowed when my mom was 7 or so, and my uncles were younger than that. Never remarried. She worked in the school cafeteria (and that was back in the day when the food was homemade) until the cancer got the best of her. 

According to Lori, the Godly Mentor, Grandma E should have stayed home with 3 small children and waited for starvation? Or should she have gone begging at a church? My mom learned a great work ethic from Grandma E, the value of education, and she passed it down to me. Eat a bag of hammers, Lori. 

[feministxtian]

6 hours ago, Pammy said:

Today's news flash from Lori:

"If you hit your kids early and often, responding with casual violence to the smallest offenses, they become seriously less irritating! It's almost like they are terrified to bother their parents at all. That's how I solved my anger problem, and you can too! Plus, there's the bonus of the kids never being visibly angry either. How proud I am of my accomplishment!"

What the everloving fuck?!?!?!? My brats RARELY got spanked as littles...now...when they got older...let's just say both my boys, as teenagers, chose to challenge my authority physically...they each only did that once. My daughter chose to tell me she was going to call the cops (she was 14). I told her I wasn't going down for child abuse...and I had 10 minutes or more before the cops would get to the house...and I'd make sure I'd go down in flames. Fortunately, my kids could never decide if I was just blowing off steam or I was serious...so they never really challenged me...well...after the boys' 1 fit of stupidity each. It had a lot to do with the previously abusive situation where they learned that mom wasn't worthy of respect...so they thought they could use force to get their way...it didn't work. 

 

My kids were and are beyond irritating most of the time, opinionated, mouthy, defiant, I just knew that they'd eventually go out into the big, wide world where that behavior wouldn't be tolerated....and they'd find out that they needed to change their ways...

 

[CuttySark]

Just goes to show diff'rent strokes. My two are opinionated, mouthy, and strong-willed, and I want them to (learn the value of kindness, and the power of politeness, and) stay that way, so they can change the world.  

[polecat]

7 hours ago, Pammy said:

Today's news flash from Lori:

"If you hit your kids early and often, responding with casual violence to the smallest offenses, they become seriously less irritating! It's almost like they are terrified to bother their parents at all. That's how I solved my anger problem, and you can too! Plus, there's the bonus of the kids never being visibly angry either. How proud I am of my accomplishment!"

 

Sigh.

I know I talk about my background a lot. I don't mean to continually bring it up ad nauseum, but Lori really helps me examine and work through things. IMany fundies wrap things up in pretty paper and frilly bows, but Lori vomits her ugliness out just as it is without even trying to pretty it up. It's easy to see it for what it is. And that's cathartic somehow. 

Anyway.

Growing up, we were NOT allowed to be angry. Not ever. Anger was simply forbidden. If we were angry (or sad or really any negative emotion), we were punished severely. SEVERELY. (lol, Jill!). Life was all about putting on a happy face for JAYSUS. Basically, we got so good at numbing ourselves, we stopped actually feeling anything real. I still have difficulty identifying certain emotions because I'm just not sure WHAT they are. Therapy, people. It's awesome. 

I've seen it come out in uglier ways, too. People who bottled up anger until it just erupted in horrible rage/violence. People who weren't allowed to grieve properly and ended up falling into deep depressions. 

When I think of Lori's kids, I really feel sad for them. But way to go, Lori. Your cold-ass self wasn't inconvenienced by any of your kids' messy emotions. Way to go. I guess. 

[usmcmom]

Well, this is an interesting tidbit from Lori's post today:

Quote

Ken and I don't have anger problems, thankfully. It is rare indeed that we ever get angry

We only have to read Lori's responses to anybody that disagrees with her to recognize her "anger problems."  Or, we can just read Ken's tirades here and on the blog to see the same. 

Lori is like a toddler with frosting all over her face who says "No, I didn't eat the cupcake." 

I just can't with these people. 

[Koala]

She's getting fewer and fewer responses these days.  I think that goes a long way in explaining her sudden distaste for all of the female ministers that she once supported/quoted/endorsed.  She's jealous.

[feministxtian]

4 hours ago, polecat said:

People who weren't allowed to grieve properly and ended up falling into deep depressions. 

When my dad died...he was buried with full military honors, 21 gun salute and the bugler playing Taps. When the bugler started playing, I lost it...right up until my precious mother pinched me on the inside of my arm (her favorite place) and informed me that I was not permitted to fall apart because I had to be strong. For years afterward, she'd justify some of her shitty behavior by saying "well MY husband died" and never ONCE acknowledged that my FATHER died. For me it still sucks...I look just like him, looking at my hands and feet are like looking at daddy's...the mother is dead and I do not grieve her one little bit...My father has been dead just over 18 years and I STILL bawl like a baby on his birthday, my birthday, Father's day...I'd give anything to see his smile and hear him call me "Bandita" (who the hell knows where that came from) one more time. 

[Hane]

Back in the '70s or so, I saw an episode of a religious talk show--The 700 or PTL Club or something of that ilk. That day, the guest was a child psychologist who at one point mentioned helping kids deal with their anger. The host (was it Jimmy Swaggart or one of that crowd--can't remember) was taken aback and clearly appalled that someone thought it was OK to let a child express anger at all.

There was also an episode with a husband-and-wife team of "textbook experts." They sat there clicking their tongues and clutching their pearls over Shel Silverstein's hysterically funny book "Uncle Shelby's ABZs" (which they totally didn't get, because it was intended for adults and fairly sophisticated children).

 

 

[Koala]

Quote

 From now on, when I teach things outside of Titus 2:3-5, I am going to have Ken look it over and make any changes he wants to it and then publish it as written by both of us or simply publish a male preacher of the Word's comments and give him credit as I am doing with my Roman's series. I have noticed that women much prefer my posts having to do with Titus 2:3-5 anyways! 

Funny that, because there's nary a mention of Ken in today's post.

I think Lori knows the score though.  She needs daily attention, which requires a daily post.  Her readers were getting bored of hearing the same song, and she needed to switch things up a bit.  

I also think her readers are getting weary of her idolization of the Pearls.  She isn't getting a lot of feedback from her TTUAC study.

[feministxtian]

WTF was her drivel about credit cards the other day? I really think she HATES women, hates being a woman and hates being married. ALL her posts are so off-putting. She goes on and on about women spending money they don't have, being wasteful, not cooking meals, etc. That is literally NONE of the women I know...NONE. Career or SAHM...now, admittedly, while I am in school, the hubby will be fending for himself a few nights a week...but he's a big boy and knows where the kitchen is...I left him pre-cut fajita meat, homemade tortillas and a few other things he can cook up for himself.

I think Lori Alexander is a fucking monster does a whole lot of projection of her own shit on to women in general. If not, who the fuck does she hang out with?

[Pammy]

Today on Lori-vision:

'Your spiritual life is controlled by your diet. Guilt-guilt-guilt if you ever indulge yourself at the expense of your eternal soul. (Mwah-ha-ha!) God is watching. Indulgent foods are equivalent to idolatry. House-wifery prevents obesity, so get home and stop making so everybody unhealthy -- selfish, worldly, (poisonous whisper) *women*. Me? I survive on a diet of house-wifery, big salads, and religious pride of course.'

[usmcmom]

Quote

From now on, when I teach things outside of Titus 2:3-5, I am going to have Ken look it over and make any changes he wants to it and then publish it as written by both of us or simply publish a male preacher of the Word's comments and give him credit as I am doing with my Roman's series. I have noticed that women much prefer my posts having to do with Titus 2:3-5 anyways! 

I think Lori's problem is that she really has no confidence when she teaches "outside of Titus 2:3-5."  That is her go-to scripture and the one that, in her mind, leads to all happiness in life.  The reverse is also true in her mind - those women who do not follow Titus 2:3-5 are responsible for all the world's evils.  Even in today's post, she had to throw in a little dig at the evil women:

Quote

Our culture spends billions on weight loss programs and food. Fast food and microwave food is commonly eaten since many women don't have time to cook nourishing meals.

I think Lori is losing readers because that is basically ALL she posts about - stay home, stay home, stay home.  If I were a young Christian mother who stayed home with her little ones (heh, I was) and I was reading blogs for encouragement (heh, I did) I would quickly delete hers from my reading list.  Imagine clicking on a blog in the few spare minutes you have during the day and the author is giving you the same post that she gave you the day before...and the day before that....and the day before that.  I think I'd very soon clinch my teeth and say "I'm already staying home!!! Please give me something else!!"

A good blogger, even one who wants each post to be a "lesson",  is able to simply tell the story of her day and allow the reader to take a lesson from it, gain encouragement from it.  A good blogger openly discusses her struggles in the same areas in which she hopes to encourage others.  Titus 2 seems to be the only direction from the Bible that Lori thinks applies to her.  Her material is too sparse and she needs to find a new "ministry." 

[docmom]

On ‎5‎/‎27‎/‎2016 at 4:01 PM, desertvixen said:

Before women got careers, Nada, did everyone die if something happened to the man of the home? No, God cares for His own

My grandfather died when my mother was 6 months old leaving her mother alone with 5 children.  The ebil British socialist government stepped in providing a nearly rent free home, free schooling right through university for all 5 children, free medical care, clothing grants etc.  My grandmother also worked cleaning the local school every night.  She was a staunch Christian.  The church provided spiritual support but absolutely nothing material.

If she had been in this situation prior to the "cradle to grave" welfare policy was introduced after WWII, the five children would have been farmed out to relatives and it's really unlikely that any of them would have gone to university.  For a comparison of outcomes read Angela's Ashes which describes the loving care the church took of Frank McCourt's family including the very real death of his twin brothers...

[Hisey]

2 hours ago, usmcmom said:

I think Lori's problem is that she really has no confidence when she teaches "outside of Titus 2:3-5."  That is her go-to scripture and the one that, in her mind, leads to all happiness in life.  The reverse is also true in her mind - those women who do not follow Titus 2:3-5 are responsible for all the world's evils.  Even in today's post, she had to throw in a little dig at the evil women:

I think Lori is losing readers because that is basically ALL she posts about - stay home, stay home, stay home.  If I were a young Christian mother who stayed home with her little ones (heh, I was) and I was reading blogs for encouragement (heh, I did) I would quickly delete hers from my reading list.  Imagine clicking on a blog in the few spare minutes you have during the day and the author is giving you the same post that she gave you the day before...and the day before that....and the day before that.  I think I'd very soon clinch my teeth and say "I'm already staying home!!! Please give me something else!!"

A good blogger, even one who wants each post to be a "lesson",  is able to simply tell the story of her day and allow the reader to take a lesson from it, gain encouragement from it.  A good blogger openly discusses her struggles in the same areas in which she hopes to encourage others.  Titus 2 seems to be the only direction from the Bible that Lori thinks applies to her.  Her material is too sparse and she needs to find a new "ministry." 

Yeah, I agree. I thought it was very disingenuous of Lori yesterday, when she said that she and Ken never had anger problems. Sure, honey. Not only that, though, none of her parents or inlaws ever had anger problems either. OR her kids. Like she knows all these people well enough to say this for sure. 

Thank you for telling us, Lori, that no one in your family ever gets angry. That seems so real and believable, I can't wait to tune in tomorrow to read more. 

[molecule]

Lori can't just do what Titus 2 tells her to do; she has to make constant references to the fact that she is doing what Titus 2 commands her to do. Most women who mentor young wives and mothers do it as a natural by-product of their relationships with women and their own desire to be loving and helpful. Lori is doing nothing more than going through the motions so she can add Titus 2 to her resume so she hassomething to hand in at the pearly gates. 

[polecat]

58 minutes ago, Hisey said:

Yeah, I agree. I thought it was very disingenuous of Lori yesterday, when she said that she and Ken never had anger problems. Sure, honey. Not only that, though, none of her parents or inlaws ever had anger problems either. OR her kids. Like she knows all these people well enough to say this for sure. 

Thank you for telling us, Lori, that no one in your family ever gets angry. That seems so real and believable, I can't wait to tune in tomorrow to read more. 

 

They may not scream, yell or throw things. I can believe that.

 

But any parents who spend hours taking turns beating a toddler over RAISANS have extremely serious anger problems. Serious enough that I'd be really scared to leave any small children under their care.

[Loveday]

51 minutes ago, molecule said:

Lori can't just do what Titus 2 tells her to do; she has to make constant references to the fact that she is doing what Titus 2 commands her to do. Most women who mentor young wives and mothers do it as a natural by-product of their relationships with women and their own desire to be loving and helpful. Lori is doing nothing more than going through the motions so she can add Titus 2 to her resume so she hassomething to hand in at the pearly gates. 

If I had a dollar for every time she says, 'This is why God  commands older women to teach younger women to...' whatever the topic of the day is, I could buy an awful lot of Megamillions tickets.

[desertvixen]

8 hours ago, feministxtian said:

WTF was her drivel about credit cards the other day? I really think she HATES women, hates being a woman and hates being married. ALL her posts are so off-putting. She goes on and on about women spending money they don't have, being wasteful, not cooking meals, etc. That is literally NONE of the women I know...NONE. Career or SAHM...now, admittedly, while I am in school, the hubby will be fending for himself a few nights a week...but he's a big boy and knows where the kitchen is

TBH, I think they all live in her head.

She definitely hates other women, especially ones like us who are doing what they WANT to do. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Lori:

"Try giving up sugar, Stephanie, since it is very addictive and health destroying. Most processed food is full of it. Make yourself give it up for 30 days since it takes this long to develop a habit. Now is a great time to give it up with all the berries and fresh, summer fruit available!"

LOL, as if fruits aren't full of sugar. Natural sugar yes, but its still sugar. 

[FundieFarmer]

I....so many things to say about that one single paragraph.

[desertvixen]

 

I had to go back and read the credit card post.  First, I notice that it's actually written by Ruth Mast, not Lori. 

Quote

There is an old saying that "a woman can throw things out the back door with a spoon faster than a man can bring it in the front door with a shovel." That means: the woman of the house is careless and wasteful. Even though the husband is diligent in providing, he can make no progress financially because his wife spends faster than he earns.

And it's just as possible for the husband to blow all the money.  My best friend has unfortunately discovered this.  Also, I find spoons are used far more frequently and regularly than the shovel is. 

Quote

By not wasting food. Give little children small portions of food, and when they clean up their plate and are still hungry, give them more.

This is actually okay advice, as long as the kids know they can have more.  It drives me nuts when people give my daughter too much food, then get annoyed that she has not finished it.

[Koala]

She just can't help herself:

Quote

I have had the opposite problem. I was following a healthy diet & didn't realize I was being so strict with it. It actually has a name...orthorexia. It caused me several health problems. I fell & broke my hip. This resulted in a hip replacement because my bones were soft from the strict diet. I have lightened up on being so strict & have gained 10 pounds. I tried to follow everything 100% which got me in trouble. So I guess everything in moderation.

Of course Lori gives fuck all about this woman's struggles:

Quote

I don't believe you can be TOO strict with a healthy diet as long as you are eating lots of healthy fats and proteins with fruits and vegetables. These "low fat" diets are terrible and so are some of the replacements (margarine) and artificial sweeteners

Yes, well here's a newsflash for you Lori:  Your thinking led to 2 daughters who struggled with body image issues (verging on anorexia), one son who thought eating sugar was a sin, and another son who thinks it's    a-okay to force feed his baby when she's not hungry, and make her sit on a blanket and watch him and his wife eat, when she is hungry.

How about you don't drive this poor woman back to an unhealthy place with your flippant dismissal of her story?  There's a really good chance that she knows more about herself than you do.

[Koala]

Quote

What good is teaching the Word if women are in rebellion to their husbands, have rebellious children, and empty homes? It's meaningless because there are too many women blaspheming the Word by disregarding these important commands that are the building blocks of any family and church. If you aren't being taught in your church, gather a few of the women together in your home, even if it is once a month, and begin teaching them Created to Be His Help Meet. When you teach it, you become more and more convicted about all of it since you must be a model to those you teach. This is good and way more important than any Bible Study you might attend.
 

Do I understand Lori correctly??  Now reading CTBHHM is "way" more important than studying the Bible?  

My, but the Pearls must be flattered.

[Loveday]

2 minutes ago, Koala said:

Do I understand Lori correctly??  Now reading CTBHHM is "way" more important than studying the Bible?  

My, but the Pearls must be flattered.

You understand her perfectly. Lori thinks CTBHHM is more important than the Bible. Can someone get a screen cap of this before Ken realises what she's said and zaps it? 

Along with Titus 2:3-5, Lori has turned the Pearls, and their books, into her idols. 

[louisa05]

23 hours ago, Pammy said:

Today on Lori-vision:

'Your spiritual life is controlled by your diet. Guilt-guilt-guilt if you ever indulge yourself at the expense of your eternal soul. (Mwah-ha-ha!) God is watching. Indulgent foods are equivalent to idolatry. House-wifery prevents obesity, so get home and stop making so everybody unhealthy -- selfish, worldly, (poisonous whisper) *women*. Me? I survive on a diet of house-wifery, big salads, and religious pride of course.'

Yeah, the bolded one, not at all. Not even close.  I already knew this, but having a Fitbit confirmed it. I move roughly 4 times as much on a work day (sub teaching) as I do on a day at home. Even a day in which I cook and clean. And the difference is about 5.5 times if it is a PE sub day.