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Counting On - Part 8: You've Seen Half this Show Before


choralcrusader8613

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finally watching this show.....I had to stop.  I can only do this in very small portions!

1.  "it's been great getting to know her".  Really?  you're saying that AFTER you go married?  Isn't that what the whole courtship crap is about?

2.  a passport picture two weeks before the trip?  Another example of the inane "Duggan-Time", so I guess buy used and save the difference doesn't count when you need to pay the fee to expedite a passport.

 

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1 minute ago, Mothership said:

1.  "it's been great getting to know her".  Really?  you're saying that AFTER you go married?  Isn't that what the whole courtship crap is about?

This has always infuriated me. I remember when Josh and Anna were just married and they were talking about learning each others likes and dislikes (I think she was cutting his hair or something in the episode), and its been like that with each subsequent marriage.  It goes to show how little these couples have gotten to know each other in their supposedly superior courtship relationships. How on Earth can you get married to someone you barely know? I know that they were raised in a totally repressive cult and this seems normal to them, but its always set alarm bells off in my head. I could never be comfortable going from a house with 20+ people to a home with one person I barely know and am now expected to make an 'Army for Christ' with. 

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YES! They say they are superior because they aren't fast and loose with their sexuality, but seriously, what's the difference between two consenting adults having a purely sexual relationship and these fundies when they first get married?

They don't know each other. They certainly don't love each other. They don't care for each other except in a superficial way. And their relationship is solely based on sex! How is that any different than dating in the secular world? The only difference is that when they find out they are incompatible, they are stuck for the rest of their lives.

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Maybe the life changing event is one of the kids refusing to be on camera any more. :pray:

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I don't think Ben is uncomfortable with PDA because he kissed Jessa at the wedding.  Just didn't let their first kiss be televised.  I think he was more nervous that the first kiss would look awkward and wanted to avoid that embarrassment.  

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1 hour ago, barbecutie said:

My guesses for "life changing" events in no particular order:

1. Smuggar comes home

2. Jinger is courting some spineless excuse of a man

3. The Dullards are coming home

4. Somebody is preggos

5. They solidify their white-savior status by bringing home a heathen brown baby :sad-roulette:

Oh my goodness. I didn't know we had a suicide emoji. My dad shot himself in December and that was really unexpected and upsetting to see. That's just my issue though. I just started therapy for it and I guess I'm easily triggered. 

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1 minute ago, sophie10130 said:

YES! They say they are superior because they aren't fast and loose with their sexuality, but seriously, what's the difference between two consenting adults having a purely sexual relationship and these fundies when they first get married?

They don't know each other. They certainly don't love each other. They don't care for each other except in a superficial way. And their relationship is solely based on sex! How is that any different than dating in the secular world? The only difference is that when they find out they are incompatible, they are stuck for the rest of their lives.

I was thinking about this yesterday. The idea behind the courtship system is that they can get to know each other.  But because they are teens, it revolves entirely around the sex that they want but can not have. The result: quick marriages so they can have sex. And because those courtships and engagements are super short, they still have sex fairly quickly after they get to know each other (I know a lot of people who probably waited longer...). But at least  its married- sex. With someone they barely know. For the rest of their lives. 

Yes, I can totally see why that is a better way than the evil heatens...

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The life changing event has to have to do with Jill or Jessa since the episode is suppose to focus on the big visit. My guess is either we see Jessa and Ben looking into adoption. Maybe filling out forms or talking to someone in Central America and it is suppose to be a cliff hanger. Or Jill announces she is pregnant and Jessa, Ben and Derick forma prayer circle around her to keep away the Zika Virus. Last guess is we see Jessa talking to Jill and saying because Jill had the courage to move to dangerous Central America, Jessa and Ben are moving to an inner city (my guess is Chicago near Ben's Bible school) to be missionaries. Does anyone know if the old Gothard properties like the ones that David and Priscillia lived in got sold? Maybe Jim Bob bought a property off of Gothard? I know David and Priscillia did not live in the inner city but the Jessa could spin it that way.

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watched a little more:

someone either on this thread or another suggested that JB has something on TLC--that is the reason that this shitshow stays on the air.  I think it's mutual dirt.  JB has gotten TLC to continue funding his kids and a marginal (at best) show with a lot of rehashed scenes, but no JB and no DQ talking heads.  They weren't even at the airport for the usual good bye scene.  TLC drew a line after Joshgate and has enforced it.  

It's really interesting to see how much they're NOT on this show.  YIPPEE!

Derek's beard and crazy hair is a giant FU to JB and his aqua net.   GO Derek!

Even's Jill's hair is sensible-still long, but sensible.  She's rocking nice and creative braids where DQ would still be doing the Gothard curls if she were living there.

I hope the life changing event is that Jill and Derek are staying in Central America--if they are, I'd respect them a lot more for making a serious effort at something and not just a missioncation.  I know-they'd still be selling their version of Jesus there, but maybe over time, they'd pick up a few things about real life and actually become helpful.  [One can dream!] 

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18 minutes ago, sophie10130 said:

YES! They say they are superior because they aren't fast and loose with their sexuality, but seriously, what's the difference between two consenting adults having a purely sexual relationship and these fundies when they first get married?

They don't know each other. They certainly don't love each other. They don't care for each other except in a superficial way. And their relationship is solely based on sex! How is that any different than dating in the secular world? The only difference is that when they find out they are incompatible, they are stuck for the rest of their lives.

Being stuck is one difference. The parents being in control of their children's sexuality is another difference.

10 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

Oh my goodness. I didn't know we had a suicide emoji. My dad shot himself in December and that was really unexpected and upsetting to see. That's just my issue though. I just started therapy for it and I guess I'm easily triggered. 

Oh dear lord. I am so sorry. My best friend took her own life, it adds a whole new dimension to grief, doesn't it?

I hope you are doing ok.

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9 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

Oh my goodness. I didn't know we had a suicide emoji. My dad shot himself in December and that was really unexpected and upsetting to see. That's just my issue though. I just started therapy for it and I guess I'm easily triggered. 

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad and I hope you find therapy beneficial. :my_heart:

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44 minutes ago, Scottie said:

 I could never be comfortable going from a house with 20+ people to a home with one person I barely know and am now expected to make an 'Army for Christ' with. 

The idea of sharing the most intimate of acts with someone that I have never been allowed to even be alone with before, is horrifying to me.  The first time I had sex was when I was 17, and had been dating my boyfriend for several months. It might not seem like a long time before having sex, but we spent a lot of time together, going on dates, or just hanging out and of course, making out.  We had at least built up a level of trust, had gotten to know each other somewhat, had shared stories about our childhood or other past experiences, had been physically close, and developed a bond between us.  How can you achieve that if you are not allowed to spend any time alone with each other; when every conversation or phone call is monitored because a "purity inspector" is listening in? 

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I really hope the "life changing news" isn't an adoption. It would be bad enough to be born into a cult, but getting adopted into one would be even worse. 

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25 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

Oh my goodness. I didn't know we had a suicide emoji. My dad shot himself in December and that was really unexpected and upsetting to see. That's just my issue though. I just started therapy for it and I guess I'm easily triggered. 

Wow.  So sorry about your loss.  Good to hear you're getting help with the grieving process.  Suicide is a bitch.

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1 hour ago, Mothership said:

1.  "it's been great getting to know her".  Really?  you're saying that AFTER you go married?  Isn't that what the whole courtship crap is about?

I think their courtships are only about establishing how much their courter loves Jesus and how easily they will sync with the Duggar collective.

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59 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

Oh my goodness. I didn't know we had a suicide emoji. My dad shot himself in December and that was really unexpected and upsetting to see. That's just my issue though. I just started therapy for it and I guess I'm easily triggered. 


It was between that and the barfing one... now I wish I picked the barfing one. I'm sorry you had to go through that. My dad basically dropped dead in front of me from an aortic tear. It's not the same thing, but I understand the suddenness and feel for you.

 

I don't think Ben is uncomfortable with PDA because he kissed Jessa at the wedding.  Just didn't let their first kiss be televised.  I think he was more nervous that the first kiss would look awkward and wanted to avoid that embarrassment.  

Well it didn't work because they completely missed each other's mouth in the photo they released.

I get embarrassed and mildly anxious every time I have to look at it. They literally DO NOT KNOW HOW TO KISS and they're expected to do sex that night? No wonder it takes some fundies longer than others to get pregnant.... *plays with lego blocks*

 

misses.jpg

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I just saw the promo for next week's episode. Joy and Jinger are tlking about courtship, again

Joy: I would go around the world to meet a guy

Jinger: Luckily, I don't have to

Producer: Is there something you want tell us

(That was paraphased)

 

 

 

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2 minutes ago, Kira said:

I just saw the promo for next week's episode. Joy and Jinger are tlking about courtship, again

Joy: I would go around the world to meet a guy

Jinger: Luckily, I don't have to

Producer: Is there something you want tell us

(That was paraphased)

 

 

 

Oh god. Please no. Not jinger.

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I can't imagine being told exactly when I should lose my virginity. I made my own decision, and it was long before Mr. Wolf. Neither of us felt like we were drinking out of a cup that had been spit in, and it's been 40 years. I think that if my first sexual encounter had been on my wedding night, and that wasn't my choice, I would have been terrified.

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1 hour ago, justmy2cents said:

I don't think Ben is uncomfortable with PDA because he kissed Jessa at the wedding.  Just didn't let their first kiss be televised.  I think he was more nervous that the first kiss would look awkward and wanted to avoid that embarrassment.  

I think that's it. They both seem so superficial, all about the surface and how they look. 

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15 minutes ago, Bad Wolf said:

I can't imagine being told exactly when I should lose my virginity. I made my own decision, and it was long before Mr. Wolf. Neither of us felt like we were drinking out of a cup that had been spit in, and it's been 40 years. I think that if my first sexual encounter had been on my wedding night, and that wasn't my choice, I would have been terrified.

I had a friend years ago that had courted her husband. I really didn't know that much about the process at the time or her faith. One night we were working late and talking about our weddings and I admitted that my husband and I didn't have sex on our wedding night. Before I could explain that it was because we got married at 4pm and our reception with many out of state guests went till 2am and we fell asleep as soon as we got to the airport hotel (we had an early morning flight) , she told me her story. She and her husband waited over 4 months to have sex after getting married. She just felt better starting like most people do and said she had never told anyone in her family or church friends that  she had waited so long after marriage. She trusted me since I was an outsider.  They had real dates, had make out sessions watching movies and snuggled. She just could not go from zero to 100 in one day. I wonder how many other fundie couples do this?

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Life changing event

Joy announces she's attending Pensacola Christian College with her BFF Carlin Bates.  (It's strict as fuck but not the TTH).

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