Happy Birthday Sarah Maxwell!

[silverspoons]

While it is not unusual these days to wait till your 30's to marry , how many 34 year olds have never been on a date? I have had several friends go through medical school and challenging residencies and not marry till Sarah's age but they did squeeze in a few dates over the years and had plenty of male interaction in the workplace.

 

I'm not sure if Sara could even handle getting married after so many years of Maxwell life unless maybe she was able to find someone on the same schedule and live next door. I live in southern Utah and it is a very sheltered place to raise kids with few options for independent activites. My child had a teacher that just didn't seem to enjoy her job so I talked with her. She explained she really wanted a different career but would have never have left southern Utah. She did not want to go to college in one of those scary bad big cities. She was a very smart women and it made me sad to see her literally shaking talking about how it would have been going to Denver or Boston.

[manda b]

Happy Birthday Sarah! I hope you get to hold the hand of a man who is not related to you!

[defraudingjezebel]

How awful it must be that her family constantly reminds her of her inadequacy as a woman (in their eyes, not mine!!). I have a feeling that "waiting for the right guy" comes up often in private- probably in their group prayers and such. Ugh, that'd be so frustrating and hurtful. 

[Eternalbluepearl]

2 minutes ago, defraudingjezebel said:

How awful it must be that her family constantly reminds her of her inadequacy as a woman (in their eyes, not mine!!). I have a feeling that "waiting for the right guy" comes up often in private- probably in their group prayers and such. Ugh, that'd be so frustrating and hurtful. 

Agreed because how is she supposed to meet the right guy? The only places she goes are her brother's houses and costco with the family. 

[iweartanktops]

So depressing. Sarah is just a bit older than I, and her dad's birthday wish for her is chocolate and snow. If my dad were the birthday wishing type, I imagine he would wish that my career goals would come along nicely this year, and continued happiness to my fiancé and I, health etc.

He also still considers me to be part of the family, although I live out of the state with my fiancé. 

 

Quote

 We love you and are so grateful you

choose to be a part of our family

until the Lord brings along the right guy.

[Four is Enough]

Are the boys even allowed to bring friends home to introduce to their sisters? Oh, wait. They don't HAVE any friends outside of the nursing home.

[nickelodeon]

HBD girlfriend, I hope this year you'll do something with ya life take lots of solo trips to Starbucks and spend all of Steve's money on caramel lattes. I hope you'll be able to study a lot of quality children's books, cultivate your writing skills, and write stories that really captivate your interest while challenging you to work hard. Don't wait around for "the right guy."

[sparkles]

The more I think about it, the more incensed I am that Steve doesn't see how incredibly hurtful his "waiting for the right guy" birthday post is. Marriage/children is what she's raised to believe is her highest calling. It's what she dreams about. Way to kick her when she's down, asshole. You may concerned about where she's going to go when she dies but she's currently living in hell on earth.

[johnhugh]

2 hours ago, picklepizzas said:

could you share the link, if you have it? 

Is it too much to hope that Steve mentioning the "right guy" means that Sarah herself might be courting? Bc otherwise this is just too depressing to think about on a day where the wind chill is already well into the negative double digits. 

I'm sorry, I don't have it.

From what I recall there was a random post on tits2 where Sarah was made by Stevie to apologise for living here life.?

[Marian the Librarian]

"Choose to be a part of our family," my ass. Stevie is still perpetuating the delusion that perfect sons-in-law will magically drop onto the Maxwells' welcome mat - no effort required. Meanwhile, his adult daughters are expected to dedicate their lives to serving his and Teri's every whim. 

Fundie parents who infantilize their adult "children" in the name of God piss me off the most. I'm lookin' at you, Steve and Teri, Geoff Botkin, Lisa and James Pennington...(feel free to add to the list).

My birthday wish for Sarah? Becoming BFFs with Faith Pennington. Imagine the possibilities.

[sparkles]

27 minutes ago, johnhugh said:

I'm sorry, I don't have it.

From what I recall there was a random post on tits2 where Sarah was made by Stevie to apologise for living here life.?

Ask and ye shall receive.

http://blog.titus2.com/2012/01/23/thank-you-9/

Quote

I am also grateful for those of you who pray for me. It is such a blessing to know you are upholding me to our Heavenly Father. I know without a shadow of a doubt that if the Lord wants me married, it is an easy thing with Him. But, that appears to not be His plan at this very moment, so I joyfully go with His plan and know that when it is His timing, it will happen. I rest contentedly and happily in what the Lord has given me.

In response to this birthday post from 2012, which generated 75 comments

http://blog.titus2.com/2012/01/18/happy-birthday-sarah-2/

Quote

 

…We love your heart for the Lord Jesus, your sweet spirit, and your great desire to fully serve and obey Him. We delight in the time we have had with you as a beautiful young woman who has chosen to continue to live in our home when you could have moved on to live any life that you desired.

While we are prepared to take over all that you do should the Lord bring a man into your life to be your husband, we are grateful for all you have given to our family and invested in so many others around the world. We are blessed to have you as a daughter and sister.

 

 

[hoipolloi]

19 minutes ago, Marian the Librarian said:

"Choose to be a part of our family," my ass. Stevie is still perpetuating the delusion that perfect sons-in-law will magically drop onto the Maxwells' welcome mat - no effort required. Meanwhile, his adult daughters are expected to dedicate their lives to serving his and Teri's every whim. 

Fundie parents who infantilize their adult "children" in the name of God piss me off the most. I'm lookin' at you, Steve and Teri, Geoff Botkin, Lisa and James Pennington...(feel free to add to the list).

My birthday wish for Sarah? Becoming BFFs with Faith Pennington. Imagine the possibilities.

Perfect sons-in-law who meet Steve's criteria for an acceptable husband -- probably not going to happen in this lifetime.

[SolomonFundy]

That level of emphasis on Sarah's prospects would ordinarily convince me that there was courtin' afoot, however tenuous and early in the process it may be. But if she were truly "on the market", I doubt they would have shunted her into a new book series immediately after the Moody's finally wrapped up. Clearly, Steve Enterprises still require Sarah's output to pad the line. 

More than any other fundy female, I want to see Sarah Maxwell have some kind of a life other than the endlessly "sweet" purgatory that she has been in since Steve assumed his position as family cult leader. 

[Elegant Mess]

I just saw the birthday blog post, and I'm still trying to figure out exactly what to make of it.  Either Steve is toying with us, or maybe Sarah is in private courtship with someone.  Otherwise, that post is just a slap to her face with a leather glove.  Marriage aside, she's never had real choice in her life.  She's never had the opportunity to make a truly informed decision over how to live her life, whether fundy, secular, or somewhere on the spectrum in-between.  From my observation, the Maxwells just see other people outside the family as potential customers, potential converts to the Maxwell flavor of Christianity, or heathens deserving of harsh judgment.  They don't see others as potential sources of true and deep loving friendship or profound wisdom.  When was the last time we heard Steve say he gained valuable insight from anyone?

Happy Birthday, Sarah!  My birthday wish for you is to find your unique individual calling on your own time and effort, whether that includes marriage with children, whether it's the life of a chic singleton who writes the next great novel in a secluded, cozy cabin in Wyoming, or something else entirely.    

[Koala]

Hmm...she's wearing the exact same sweater in the 2012 & 2015 birthday posts.  Are they using old pics?  

[Eternalbluepearl]

1 hour ago, SolomonFundy said:

I want to see Sarah Maxwell have some kind of a life other than the endlessly "sweet" purgatory that she has been in since Steve assumed his position as family cult leader. 

Me too. I think of her and her situation often.  I need help. 

[kpmom]

12 minutes ago, Koala said:

Hmm...she's wearing the exact same sweater in the 2012 & 2015 birthday posts.  Are they using old pics?  

Sarah always looks the same to me year after year, so it's hard to tell.

The skirt is different between this year and last year.

My guess is they (whoever is writing a happy birthday post) just goes through their saved pictures and picks out one or two of the birthday person they think looks good.  So maybe they are older pictures.

ETA: Just found this comment and Sarah's response very interesting;

Cherry says:

January 19, 2016 at 6:46 am

A big happy birthday sarah!! You are so blessed with many talents. I married in my thirties and have two beautiful daughters now. My husband was totally worth the wait! I hope the next twelve months bring lots of wonderful imaginings for your much anticipated books
Love cherry
—
Thank you! Your story is amazing. I know the guy will be worth the wait whenever he comes.

[nokidsmom]

Also, what gets me is this business about "choosing to be a part of our family".   If Steveovah means that it's because she doesn't have a family yet, well, guess who contributed to that state of affairs?   But no matter what she does, isn't she part of the family?    If she decided to take off and do her own thing in spite of Steveovah's objections does that mean she would no longer be part of the family?   I just don't get that comment.   As if there was a choice and she's family no matter what. Oh wait...it's Steve.....never mind, carry on.

[felinefundie]

I have such a soft spot for Sarah Maxwell. I have this irrational fear of ending up a spinster and I'm not even twenty yet, so I can't imagine what it has to feel like being a woman in her thirties in a patriarchal cult who has been deprived of what she thinks her only purpose in life is.  I also have my education and career and independent life and whatnot to keep be occupied while "the Lord brings the right guy into my life". Sarah has so few choices and options. I wish beyond anything that this year she gets to explore her interests and the world and seek happiness. Alas, that is a pipe dream. 

Happy Birthday Sarah. I hope you have moments of true happiness today and every day. 

[Koala]

51 minutes ago, nokidsmom said:

Also, what gets me is this business about "choosing to be a part of our family".   If Steveovah means that it's because she doesn't have a family yet, well, guess who contributed to that state of affairs?   But no matter what she does, isn't she part of the family?    If she decided to take off and do her own thing in spite of Steveovah's objections does that mean she would no longer be part of the family?   I just don't get that comment.   As if there was a choice and she's family no matter what. Oh wait...it's Steve.....never mind, carry on.

Well said.  

It's a very cult like mentality, with the clear implication that:

Staying and "serving"= being in the family

Marrying= you are now extended family

Leaving to pursue a life of your own= depart from us, we never knew you

I can not imagine having a house full of grown adults sitting around all day.  How awkward would that be?

[Toothfairy]

9 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

How old is she now, 34? 35? 

This bit really stood out:

 

 

There needs to be a space between a and part.

She's getting old now. If she gets married in a year she may be able to have 3-5 kids max before fertility levels drop off. But I don't see a marriage happening any time soon. As we've said, she's too used to be at home. Suddenly being totally alone would be a huge change.

 

Or going from 0 to 100 in a day. Can't imagine what a Maxwell courtship  looks like

Poor Sarah. She's turning into an old maid. Even cinderella  had a happy ending. Can't say the same for Sarah. Only a few more years til 40. Maybe Steve doesn't want her to have kids or be married. It might cause him jealousy  issues.

[0 kids n not countin]

http://blog.titus2.com/2013/02/page/2/

 

There was this post from 2013 where "the Lord" showed Sarah how she lacks gratefulness.

 

It was also discussed on FJ, but not sure how to link to that previous thread.

[Black Aliss]

7 hours ago, kpmom said:

I wondered that too.  Like someone up thread said, after several years of being content at home posts, and removing the waiting for the right guy stuff from her bio, it's being mentioned again.

Either they're advertising her, or there is something in the works.

Probably a middle-aged widower with a bunch of teenage kids. Out of the frying pan and into the fire, Sarah.

[Mela99]

So if Steve determines someone is the right guy she has to marry him? 

[JemimaPuddle-Duck]

I'm debating sharing something....stupid question, but how does the spoiler feature work? Is there a member/post count requirement or does it simply prevent showing up in a Google search?