Growing Up Quiverful Kristina Miner - MERGED

[LadyCrow1313]

:: commenting to save access to this; can't watch it now but looks very interesting ::

[HarryPotterFan]

sorry. that was supposed to be beat, not eat, but the responses cracked me up. Thanks everyone. 

I cracked up because I didn't read that as a typo. Though now I am tempted to debate what's worse, cannibalism or the Pearls.

[JMO]

This should be posted on the main forum.  Eye opening to see and hear a first person account. 

[BullyJBG]

Bless her heart. I read her story on Recovering Grace; she does seem like one of the lucky ones in a way; that she got to go to a REAL college, get a REAL degree and work a REAL job, at least until marriage. I wonder when we'll see more of these; like the one who wrote the one Once a Child Always a Child?. Better yet, if anyone comes out with a story of, we and the Duggars were good friends until.......Still waiting for that story to appear on Recovering Grace. But I guess they may have filtered out stories like Razing Ruth and Ashleigh.......

[HarryPotterFan]

But on a more serious note the video of the Pearls talking about and demonstrating child abuse was terrifying. I will never understand why anyone thinks this kind of thing is okay or how anyone could ever strike their child. 

[JMO]

But on a more serious note the video of the Pearls talking about and demonstrating child abuse was terrifying. I will never understand why anyone thinks this kind of thing is okay or how anyone could ever strike their child. 

He is a scary scary man.  It drives home to me the point they made in the video, that certain personality types are drawn to this since it affirms their own authoritarian or abusive tendencies. 

[iweartanktops]

I haven't watched the video yet, but I am looking forward to it! 

The other day, I found a website with the entire book, To Train Up A Child. I'm barely through the first section and it's chilling. The Pearls belong in prison for life. I'm not sure if I will ever finish the book, because it's so disturbing. 

I think it affects me even more, since I take care of babies for a living. I was imagining the two sweet girls I care for as I read it, and it made me feel physically ill. I would never, even in their worst days of teething, fussing, etc., even consider abusing them. Ugh. I just can't imagine how someone could justify hitting an infant.*

*children, too, but it's particularly fucked up to hit a BABY! 

[SpoonfulOSugar]

Here is Kristiana's Recovering Grace story:

http://www.recoveringgrace.org/2011/11/keeping-up-appearances/

She really does know the buzz words and key phrases, doesn't she?

My heart broke for her in the video as she described being a high school homeschooler, trying to self-teach biology, while also managing a household.

[Bad Wolf]

I read it too. Horrifying. One interesting thing was that he said parents shouldn't have their children perform. He compared it to having your dog do tricks. Apparently, the Duggars missed that bit, with their squeaky violins and their BLOOD of Jesus.

I guess they were only interested in blanket training and using the rod. Poor kids. 

[hauntedoklahoma]

I felt really bad for her when she said she was the disciplinarian sometimes. She showed so much regret and really that isn't her fault at all.

[tumblr]

This was an extremely interesting find for me, though I am new to posting on here I have been interested in Gothardites for a few years now as I thought about joining at one point of my life. 

It's really harrowing to see this kind of documentary/interview and there definitely needs to be more like it. If enough people are willing to come forward and talk I would love to see a documentary like the one done on Westboro Baptist by BBC. 

[ksgranola1]

Wow. Just Wow. That explains a lot. How scary are the Pearls! I can't believe JB & M fell for this.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

As much as I find her interview interesting and informative, I really don't think it speaks to hope for the Duggars beyond their access to the Internet after marriage and MAYBE their spouse being offended by abuse. Her major turning point was being able to go to a real college, get a real internship, and then get a real job because her parents had just enough common sense to see the value in a real education and being able to provide for oneself in the event that something happens to a husband. None of the Duggar children will be granted that ability. Even the Bateses, with their higher than the Duggars standard of education, won't allow their children those real opportunities. 

[PreciousPantsofDoom]

Wow, amazing interview.  I was struck by how articulate she was compared to the Duggars.  

I also kept noticing the tattoo on her arm.  I don't normally like tattoos, because I am old and judgy ,  but every time I caught sight of hers I thought, "You go girl, do whatever you want with your body. "  

[Othello]

Do a FJ AMA lol

 

It would be pretty much the same as this—the isolation, discipline, uniforms, putting all the responsibility on my older sister (she and my brother and I were very close and it really took a toll on her), having to self-educate because the parents wouldn't take on any responsibility but still wanted to control everything; it's a weird dichotomy. Kristiana nailed it pretty much, it plays out just like she describes.

Great find- I think I should anonymously forward this video to some of my fundie-lite cousins who are starting to lean towards more extreme standards.  

Please do! This could truly save some lives from an intellectual prison.

[Sunnyday]

I went to the Pearl's website, No Greater Joy and read the Letter to the Abused Woman.  It's unbelievable.  I wonder if it is the kind of "counsel" Anna is receiving.

Worse than a cheating spouse, they address the physically abusive husband.  They instruct that the wife should have him arrested and put in jail, visit him, write love letters and be there in ten or twenty years when he gets out.  

[AlwaysExcited]

Isolation rooms?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Isolation rooms?

prayer closets 

[AlwaysExcited]

prayer closets 

Hearing how she spoke about their usage in ATI camps, more like prison cells.

[AlwaysExcited]

prayer closets 

Hearing how she spoke about their usage in ATI camps, more like prison cells.

[Drala]

As much as I find her interview interesting and informative, I really don't think it speaks to hope for the Duggars beyond their access to the Internet after marriage and MAYBE their spouse being offended by abuse. Her major turning point was being able to go to a real college, get a real internship, and then get a real job because her parents had just enough common sense to see the value in a real education and being able to provide for oneself in the event that something happens to a husband. None of the Duggar children will be granted that ability. Even the Bateses, with their higher than the Duggars standard of education, won't allow their children those real opportunities. 

I agree, but would add that her husband also provided a major turning point.  She first started to question her home environment because of him.  For this reason, I have some hope that Jessa and Jill can be swayed by the different perspectives that their husbands bring about what constitutes "normal" family life.  It's the lack of education--coupled with the financial dependency on JimBob--that creates a double-whammy for people like Jana and Jinger.  No one is hungry enough to feel driven by desperation to find something better.  Plus, it looks like the fundie-lite sons-in-law are being bought off by Duggar money.  I keep waiting for Derrick to come to his senses, but I don't think it's dawned on him yet the full extent of what he's gotten into.  The decision to get away and go abroad may be an attempt to separate from the family in a manner acceptable to JB.  At some point, though, Jill may have to chose between her headship or Daddy's approval and money.  Derrick, unlike Ben, is at least in a position to make a financial break.  

[IreneIssh]

I really liked that they did use the Michael Pearl footage, as awful as it is. My boyfriend did some work with Everything is Terrible and made videos with them for a while, and they did a lot of work to keep that video on the internet after Pearl's lawyers came after them to take it down. They started uploading to every streaming and torrent site so that people could see how awful he was and so it would never really leave the internet. And this was without the team really knowing how many children have been seriously hurt or killed because of his teachings. My boyfriend was surprised when I mentioned that he was one of the folks discussed on FJ. So I was really glad that to see that their footage is still getting passed around.  

Kristiana is a really good speaker and I found this really fascinating. I hope that this video informs a lot of people about how effed up this cult is. 

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I agree, but would add that her husband also provided a major turning point.  She first started to question her home environment because of him.  For this reason, I have some hope that Jessa and Jill can be swayed by the different perspectives that their husbands bring about what constitutes "normal" family life.  It's the lack of education--coupled with the financial dependency on JimBob--that creates a double-whammy for people like Jana and Jinger.  No one is hungry enough to feel driven by desperation to find something better.  Plus, it looks like the fundie-lite sons-in-law are being bought off by Duggar money.  I keep waiting for Derrick to come to his senses, but I don't think it's dawned on him yet the full extent of what he's gotten into.  The decision to get away and go abroad may be an attempt to separate from the family in a manner acceptable to JB.  At some point, though, Jill may have to chose between her headship or Daddy's approval and money.  Derrick, unlike Ben, is at least in a position to make a financial break.  

it's true that he helped, but he was also part of the experience she got that will be denied to Duggars: school, work, and a sense of freedom before marriage. Also, you're forgetting that Derick quit his job do be a Duggar and Ben is doing nothing with his degree, either. Even Anna is living at the compound, despite Josh's failings. 

As long as JB is the one arranging who they meet, or at least where they meet, none of the kids are going to find spouses who truly question the Duggar way. Especially if the Duggar parents are as manipulative as they seem. 

Also, remember that Jill, Derick, and Israel already attended their first ATI conference. Derick has been completely sold into the life, and Ben is probably just as sold himself. If anyone is questioning it, it's probably Cathy. But I see Cathy as taking more like Amy, questioning the beliefs, but not doing anything to rock the boat. 

[MerryHappy]

Kristiana is a friend of mine. 

 

She is an amazing person. She is incredibly tough, incredibly resilient. I was so thrilled to see her grant this interview. Her parents have been anything but supportive of her choice to live in freedom, yet she powers through it. 

Kristiana rocks! 

[Othello]

Kristiana is a friend of mine. 

 

She is an amazing person. She is incredibly tough, incredibly resilient. I was so thrilled to see her grant this interview. Her parents have been anything but supportive of her choice to live in freedom, yet she powers through it. 

Kristiana rocks! 

Next time you see her give her a hug and tell her she's awesome for me! If that wouldn't be too weird.