Real Life Fundie Encounters - Part 3

[Purrl]

On 3/19/2017 at 10:42 PM, MarblesMom said:

Wow, Bible MIssionary Institute has no web presence, but apparently is an UNaccredited college:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bible_Missionary_Church

Splitting off from the Nazarenes must have been a big deal, as the Nazarene Church I attended in the late 70s was SUPER fundy. 

My dear friends are Nazarene. The husband is a preacher. They have changed a LOT since my childhood. They were more like Pentecostals in personal appearance and religious practices (with some exceptions) but now can wear pants, makeup, jewelry. They still do not drink, smoke or dance though - at least not publicly. And they have never been (at least not the ones I know locally) very patriarchal. My friend's dad was Baptist though so maybe their family wasn't a typical Nazarene family. Her family now is very "normal" looking and her kids did go to Prom (which surprised me!) so I believe they are changing with the times.

[Boogers]

On 3/13/2017 at 11:30 AM, Joyfully Available said:

At this point, I'm an evil pant wearing woman, with no children, working outside the home and I have questioned his authority.  I think he is passively aggressively trying to get back at me by going to the bathroom (#2) numerous times a day and leaving the door open. I sit right across the hall from the office bathroom  and he refuses to turn on the fan, spray, use poo pourri  or crack the window. Sometimes he won't even flush. The man is literally shitting on me.  

Fellow long time lurker here, finally posting. 

Am I the only one reading the above as this guy leaving the door open after he's done, and doing nothing to prevent/reduce the stench so that JA has to smell it? 

(One heck of a first post haha. Let's see if I can do quotes right...)

[Flossie]

45 minutes ago, Boogers said:

Fellow long time lurker here, finally posting. 

Am I the only one reading the above as this guy leaving the door open after he's done, and doing nothing to prevent/reduce the stench so that JA has to smell it? 

(One heck of a first post haha. Let's see if I can do quotes right...)

I think the poster is a troll.  There's been a rash of that here lately.

[Boogers]

5 minutes ago, Flossie said:

I think the poster is a troll.  There's been a rash of that here lately.

Fair enough. They're certainly creative, if they are a troll.

Edited April 5, 2017 by Boogers

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

8 hours ago, Boogers said:

Fellow long time lurker here, finally posting. 

Am I the only one reading the above as this guy leaving the door open after he's done, and doing nothing to prevent/reduce the stench so that JA has to smell it? 

That was how I read it, too. (It's nice to see you posting!  )

If she is a troll, I guess I hadn't noticed.  I do notice the really obvious, angry ones, but sometimes it takes me a bit to notice the other types.

[Joyfully Available]

17 hours ago, Flossie said:

I think the poster is a troll.  There's been a rash of that here lately.

I'm definitely not a troll. This is unfortunately an ongoing horror story I'm living and it is very uncomfortable. I never dreamed I would be in quarters as close as these with a real live fundie and such a nasty one at that. For a long time I didn't really connect the dots. I would read here and then I would find out more about him the longer I've worked with him and then I started questioning. I'm happy to share real names and our actual location but I'm a little nervous to do so. Heck, I'd show pictures at this point. Also, as soon as I find out his home church I'll definitely share it and the website should they have one.

To clarify, he isn't actually exposing himself to me as he sits on the toilet. He's either slightly cracking the door during or leaving it wide open AFTER he goes #2. I sit in an unfortunate area where all the "odors" from the bathroom get sucked right into my office and he knows it. He goes frequently and refuses to clean up after himself. I.E. feces on the toilet, refusing to flush or wash hands, knowing we also have to use that bathroom. He's not stupid. He's doing it on purpose.

This is also the guy that was pushing the use of the "family cloth" in his home. Thanks to FJ for educating me on that term.  I feel so badly for his daughters and wife... I know they must have to clean up after him full time at home.

I enjoy reading here and sharing my (as of late, strange) daily office life. It  has been somewhat therapeutic. There aren't a whole lot of people around who know much about fundies or that people like that even exist and while my family and co-workers know he's strange and a problem, they don't really know exactly what he is.  I hope not to get the cold shoulder from more seasoned posters.

You can't make this kind of stuff up people!

[Flossie]

1 hour ago, Joyfully Available said:

I'm definitely not a troll. This is unfortunately an ongoing horror story I'm living and it is very uncomfortable. I never dreamed I would be in quarters as close as these with a real live fundie and such a nasty one at that. For a long time I didn't really connect the dots. I would read here and then I would find out more about him the longer I've worked with him and then I started questioning. I'm happy to share real names and our actual location but I'm a little nervous to do so. Heck, I'd show pictures at this point. Also, as soon as I find out his home church I'll definitely share it and the website should they have one.

To clarify, he isn't actually exposing himself to me as he sits on the toilet. He's either slightly cracking the door during or leaving it wide open AFTER he goes #2. I sit in an unfortunate area where all the "odors" from the bathroom get sucked right into my office and he knows it. He goes frequently and refuses to clean up after himself. I.E. feces on the toilet, refusing to flush or wash hands, knowing we also have to use that bathroom. He's not stupid. He's doing it on purpose.

This is also the guy that was pushing the use of the "family cloth" in his home. Thanks to FJ for educating me on that term.  I feel so badly for his daughters and wife... I know they must have to clean up after him full time at home.

I enjoy reading here and sharing my (as of late, strange) daily office life. It  has been somewhat therapeutic. There aren't a whole lot of people around who know much about fundies or that people like that even exist and while my family and co-workers know he's strange and a problem, they don't really know exactly what he is.  I hope not to get the cold shoulder from more seasoned posters.

You can't make this kind of stuff up people!

Don't post names and pictures!  If you want to verify your name, talk to a mod.  They have some sort of process for that, and it's not something that the rest of us are privy to.

If you aren't a troll, then I apologize for suggesting it.  I just find it difficult to believe that an employee can behave in such a way and get away with it.  I know that there are innumerable examples of people with horrible personalities able to keep jobs, but it was the bathroom behavior that I found hard to believe.

[GenerationCedarchip]

I've seen some amazing craziness in small business, though, which sounds like the situation here.  It can be tough to get people with specialized skills because pay and benefits tend to be lower in small businesses. Also, depending on the size of the operation, they may be exempt from some regulations - and getting relief under employment laws is not that easy.

[frugaldreams]

This is definitely gross and maybe TMI so don't keep reading if you are easily sqicked out but .........

 

 

I am a black belt passive aggressive person. I was raised by an addict and the queen of all enablers. After loads of therapy I realized this is not a way to behave and try to avoid such behavior, generally. 

However; I was in a similar situation with a particular male. It was urine instead of feces but he wouldn't clean up either. Just laugh and say "What's the big deal? It's natural." 

Since requesting respect like one adult talking to another failed I waited. I waited until Aunt Flo came to town and then you can bet your bottom dollar I did not clean up after myself. I may or may not have ensured there was some visible mess just to get my point across.

And as sure as god made little green apples douche canoe started complaining loudly about how gross it was and the I laughed and said "What's the big deal? It's natural." An agreement of mutual responsibility for personal cleanliness what quickly concluded at that point.

Is it still passive aggression if you do it knowingly or does it just become aggressive aggression at that point? I've never been real clear on that.

[PumaLover]

I saw a fundie mom and daughter at Chuck E. Cheese's this weekend. Long hair, jumpers down to the floor. I thought it was cool that they were allowed to go to such a worldly place, with video games and beer and stuff like that!

[Jana814]

1 minute ago, PumaLover said:

I saw a fundie mom and daughter at Chuck E. Cheese's this weekend. Long hair, jumpers down to the floor. I thought it was cool that they were allowed to go to such a worldly place, with video games and beer and stuff like that!

Wow!!  That is the last place I would expect a Fundie family would be. 

[Free2BeMe]

Jehovah's Witnesses,

Three women sitting on a bench across from a coffeeshop and a clothing store.

They are wearing modern modest clothing and look like normal everyday people, but their not, their JW's.

---

Downtown Apex.

 

Edited April 14, 2017 by Free2BeMe

[GoddessOfVictory]

There was a Mennonite woman that came into my work this week. We have a few communities in my state, though none are very near my town. Still, we see them around occasionally. This one looked to be late teens/early twenties and was by herself, which was unusual. She was dressed in a purple top (made from very pretty fabric) with matching skirt in the old-fashioned style they wear and had a black and white polka-dotted kerchief covering her hair. She didn't stay long and didn't buy anything (those that come in usually never buy anything).

Seeing her reminded me of another time I ran into some Mennonites. I was in the waiting room at the dentist office and a whole van-full of them pulled up and came in for appointments. I remember it mostly because they were speaking German, or a dialect of/similar language to German, the entire time.

And just a few weeks ago I saw a fundie family in the fabric store. A mother and her three young daughters, all in skirts, all with long hair, talking about the clothes grandma made them.

Since I've started writing these down I've realized - there are so many fundies in my state. So. Many.

Edited April 15, 2017 by GoddessOfVictory

[FeministShrew]

I was at a family reunion today. My IFB sister (she does wear pants, oddly enough) was telling her 10 year old grandson that the earth is "around 6,000 years old," in response to his question about when Adam & Eve lived. She also told him Methuselah was the oldest person who ever lived. 
The kid was bored & reading Genesis on my sister's phone, and I learned that he reads the Bible daily with his teacher. His public school teacher. 
So my secular -liberal arts-college educated sister is a young earth creationist, and somewhere in Spartanburg County, SC, is a public school teacher who thinks it's ok to have a bible study with elementary school students at school.
I was also surrounded by Trump supporters. Mr. Shrew & I spent lots of time looking at our phones and talking to each other.
 

[FeministShrew]

I forgot to add that she was also making fun of people who believe chemtrails are poison and their microwaves are watching them. 
No enough faces. Not enough palms.

[neurogirl]

Not so much a real-life fundie encounter, but close enough that I'm posting here. I got a mailing card inviting me to a local church where the pastor looked like a young and sexy lumberjack, their tagline was "love God, love people, have a blast" and they were marketed towards 20- and 30- somethings, so as a formerly Christian person questioning my faith now I looked at their website. One of their core values is that they are "masculine" (call for men to be servant-leaders of their families, the Church, and the community) and Complementarian in their Biblical roles for men and women. Nope nope nope! I thought I wouldn't have to worry about a church like that in my So-Cal super liberal area!!!!

[RC-2017]

On 15/04/2017 at 8:24 AM, GoddessOfVictory said:

There was a Mennonite woman that came into my work this week. We have a few communities in my state, though none are very near my town. Still, we see them around occasionally. This one looked to be late teens/early twenties and was by herself, which was unusual. She was dressed in a purple top (made from very pretty fabric) with matching skirt in the old-fashioned style they wear and had a black and white polka-dotted kerchief covering her hair. She didn't stay long and didn't buy anything (those that come in usually never buy anything).

If you don't mind my asking, are you in the Upper Midwest, or the Northwest?  It's just that the clothes, and particularly the hair covering, you describe sound more Hutterite than Mennonite, and they live in those areas.  Did her clothes look anything like this?  The girls in the top photo are Lehrerleut, the most conservative Hutterite group, while those in the bottom photo appear to be Dariusleut, a more moderate group.  (Women in the most progressive Hutterite group, the Schmiedeleut, now tend to wear one-piece dresses with a plain black kerchief, so I haven't included a photo of their clothing.)

 

 

 

[Scrabblemaster]

There were Jehovas Witnesses who came to our door and left a sheet. I was not at home and had to question Mr. Scrabblemaster how they looked like and if they wanted to talk with him. They just gave him the sheet and left. It was an invitation for two meetings of them during Easter. The pictures were horrible kitschy. Mr. S was irritated that they came to our door and then only gave the sheet without beginning a conversation.

[smittykins]

IME JWs tend to dress modestly, but not necessarily distinctly, when they're at meetings or going door-to-door(knee-length-or-longer dresses/skirts for females, suits and ties for males).

[feministxtian]

J-dubs dress "modestly" for meetings and field service...the rest of the time, no. You have no idea how thrilled we were when Mr Xtian's daughters left the JWs. They tend to be as opposed to higher education as the IBLP crowd. The girls were #4 and #5 in their HS graduating class and could have gotten 4 year academic rides to any school in the country...but their mother, the JW, wouldn't fill out the scholarship forms. (Bitch!). J slogged through nursing school, got her RN and is now finishing up her BSN. H "wandered the wilderness" including an ill-fated marriage to a lazy, abusive JW boy, woke up, divorced him and is now working on a criminal justice degree at VaTech. Their mother is PISSED...we're beyond proud. 

[GoddessOfVictory]

On 4/21/2017 at 4:54 AM, RC-2017 said:

It's just that the clothes, and particularly the hair covering, you describe sound more Hutterite than Mennonite

 

Haha! Silly me, I forgot we have those here too. In which case, I think you may be right, the person I saw recently was probably Hutterite. My mistake.

The outfit was more closely related to the top photo you posted, though not exactly the same - the shirt was long-sleeved and one-piece and exactly matched the fabric of the skirt.

[purjolok84]

On 21 April 2017 at 9:45 PM, Scrabblemaster said:

There were Jehovas Witnesses who came to our door and left a sheet. I was not at home and had to question Mr. Scrabblemaster how they looked like and if they wanted to talk with him. They just gave him the sheet and left. It was an invitation for two meetings of them during Easter. The pictures were horrible kitschy. Mr. S was irritated that they came to our door and then only gave the sheet without beginning a conversation.

I recently got my first JW visit at my new house - near where we live there's a large Kingdom Hall. They were offering a seminar over Easter on how to bring peace to an angry world and looked extremely well dressed, as if they were going to dinner. So they don't even get to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus!

[FeministShrew]

26 minutes ago, purjolok84 said:

I recently got my first JW visit at my new house - near where we live there's a large Kingdom Hall. They were offering a seminar over Easter on how to bring peace to an angry world and looked extremely well dressed, as if they were going to dinner. So they don't even get to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus!

I used to work with a JW. According to him, they don't celebrate the resurrection, but the death. He said that the communion is put in front of the church, but only members of the 144,000 that are going to heaven can partake of it. You know in your heart if you're one of those (because God tells you? he didn't say), but he'd never seen or heard of anyone partaking of it. He was in his early 50s & had been a JW since his late teens. 
According to him, the congregation sits in silence, contemplating the death of Jesus, and then the communion is taken away & the service is over.
From wikipedia, because I never checked to see if what he said  was true:

Spoiler

 

"Jehovah's Witnesses commemorate Christ's death as a ransom or "propitiatory sacrifice" by observing the Lord's Evening Meal, or Memorial. They celebrate it once per year, noting that it was instituted on the Passover, an annual festival.[20] They observe it on Nisan 14 according to the ancient Jewish luni-solar calendar.[21] Jehovah's Witnesses are taught that this is the only celebration the Bible commands Christians to observe.[22]

Of those who attend the Memorial, a small minority worldwide partake of the unleavened bread and wine. This is because Jehovah's Witnesses believe that the majority of the faithful have an earthly hope. Only those who believe they have a heavenly hope, the "remnant" (those still living) of the 144,000 "anointed", partake of the bread and wine.[23] In 2015, the number of persons who partook worldwide was 15,177, whereas the number who attended was 19,862,783.[24]

The Memorial, held after sunset, includes a talk on the meaning of the celebration and the circulation among the audience of unadulterated red wine and unleavened bread. Jehovah's Witnesses believe the bread symbolizes Jesus Christ's body which he gave on behalf of mankind, and that the wine symbolizes his blood which redeems from sin. They do not believe in transubstantiation or consubstantiation.[25][26] Because many congregations have no members who claim to be anointed, it is common for no one to partake of the bread and wine."

 

So not on Easter Sunday, but the equivalent of Nisan 14.

Edited April 23, 2017 by FeministShrew
Add a sentence.

[smittykins]

My late husband and I were invited to attend a Memorial(the JW version of Communion)by a former coworker of mine.  No one in that congregation was considered to be part of the 144,000, so the emblems were merely passed around the room.  Weird.

[feministxtian]

Our new place is near a Kingdumb hall. I'm just waiting...mwahahahahaha