Real Life Fundie Encounters - Part 3

[Swamptribe]

6 hours ago, BlackberryGirl said:

BlackberryBoy, born in the South, described "Bless Your Heart" as "kindly contempt." perfect description..

 

"Bless your heart" translates as "you're so stupid".  "My how nice" translates as "I don't give a f*&ck".

[Gobbles]

I went to IKEA today and the bus drives past a US army thing. Two young women got in and sat down right next to me. They were talking English and the younger one told the other one about a church (International Baptist Church http://www.ibcstuttgart.de ) she is attending. The older one asked if the church is a more conservative one and then they talked about being raised conservative and that the church is okay, but a bit too contemporary. But better than other churches they know here in Germany. The pastor is from Texas and they both agreed that this is a good thing. The younger one told the other that she married young. (She said she was in her mid twenties.) 

Not really fundie I think, but better than nothing! And I got all excited when they started talking about churches. 

Edited August 5, 2016 by Gobbles

[jozina]

Saw a family in the supermarket today with 9 children.  6 boys who were all barefoot, kind of dirty and in oddly fitting clothes. 3 girls in long skirts with shoes.  The mother had that deer in the headlights, sweet simpering kind of Michelle Duggar thing going on and two of the younger kids were singing something about Jesus.

Terribly, terribly behaved boys though!  Makes me appreciate the supermarket behaviour of my 3 much more than I usually do.

[wotdancer]

I attended my first fundie wedding yesterday! Complete with foot washing (he washed one of her feet, then she washed one of his - I'm still not sure why only one?) and the couple's first kiss. They continued to kiss very awkwardly/intensely through the reception haha, and I may or may not have been tempted to see if the groom was trying to hide his excitement 

[Gobbles]

@wotdancer A religious (not very, but more than the average religious German) friend from school is engaged to her boyfriend right now. She is 26, so not that young, but still, I think young for being engaged. She had at least one other boyfriend. I dropped out of school before we were old enough to discuss the real important topics like "sex before marriage" and so every time she pops up on my Facebook feed I wonder if she waits with having sex or not. He is religious too. 

(We were close friends, so if she does have a huge marriage I wonder about if I am invited or not. I think not because we have no contact any more other than Facebook but still...)

[denimchastityskirt]

My favorite encounter was when fundies came to our doorstep and hung around for like 20 minutes. I could see four people walking up our driveway, two men in their 50s in fedora hats, white shirt, black trousers and suspenders. With them was a young couple - late teens, early 20s and holding hands. The chick had the typical long hair and frumpy attire, guy wearing what I assume is typical JW garb.

Anyway in my house I can stand in my hallway and look out to see who is at my door without them seeing me, it's pretty awesome. Also my front door is glass. So the young couple started banging on the door really urgently and loudly. This should be good I thought. Our car was home, and the tv was on so it was pretty obvious that someone was home. Our cat walked up to the door,  looked at them, looked at me and then kept looking from me to the door. It was pretty funny because it really gave away that I was there. They started pressing their face against the door, and went up to the living room window trying to see in! Creepy shit. Then they would go back to the door and knocked urgently over and over again. I was both amused and impressed by their determination. 

Finally, they gave up and I saw them walk over to our neighbors house where no one was home. Now because I am a troll, I went and opened my front door and loudly put the trash out. They looked right at me with an "oh shit" expression and I flashed them a grin and went back inside. Then I watched from the window at the side of my house and saw the two older guys who had been watching the couple beat on our door start losing their shit at the couple, clearly pissed off that they didn't try hard enough to get me to open the door or something. It was a good show!

[psycho-hope]

On 26/7/2016 at 0:07 PM, nastyhobbitses said:

. Though I'd love to hear "Jesus thinks you have nice tits".

I love it im giggling like a loon here and the hound is looking at me like ive lost my mind

[catlady]

my friend told me this story:  he was mid-20's at the time, and lived alone in an apartment.  two young people knocked (don't recall if they were Mormon or JW); my friend guessed that they were brother and sister, brother early 20's, sister a bit younger.  brother attempted to do most of the talking and sister stood slightly behind and to the side.  my friend, an atheist who regretted answering the door the second he opened it, decided to annoy them by flirting with the girl.  

Brother:  "can i talk to you about Jesus?"

Friend:  "no, but i'll talk to her.  hey there, can i get you something to drink?"  

every time brother asked a question, friend directed his answer to sister and attempted to converse with her.  she seemed very shy and didn't really say anything.  brother kept trying to direct the conversation back to their religion.  

finally, friend got bored with the whole thing and said to sister, "so, have you ever hooked up with a non-repentant sinner?"  the brother promptly made their exit.  friend felt a little badly because the girl looked so spooked by that last line.  he saw them elsewhere in the neighborhood two more times in the next several days, but they never came back to his building.

[ShebrewDefrauder]

This isn't really a real life person encounter, but I ordered a few things off of Amazon recently and got them today. One of the items was a used DVD set which was wrapped in plastic and there was another plastic-wrapped used DVD that I didn't order that had gotten stuck to it. It's an Analytical Grammar series produced by American Family Studios and also has logos on the back for The Potter's School and The Homeschool Channel. A perfunctory search on Google led me to the American Family Association site, which states "American Family Studios was begun in 2011 as a way to advance the Christian worldview into an increasingly media rich culture. We use animation, film, video, documentary and audio to encourage, uplift and inspire audiences all around the world." So am I correct in assuming that I accidentally got fundie homeschooling DVDs along with my Ken Burns documentary? 

[solacetea]

On 7/21/2016 at 0:32 PM, catlady said:

I would have guessed Amish, New Order maybe.  (New Order is slightly less conservative than Old Order, but I understand there's a whole hierarchy).

in relation to @feministxtian above, about 12 years ago I went to Las Vegas and saw 2 couples who were likely Mennonite.  it was at the top of the Stratosphere later in the evening (Mr. CL wanted to ride the roller coaster after dark).  they were all about 20 yrs old; the guys were wearing jeans and modern button-style shirts.  the girls however had on calico prairie dresses and white bonnets.  all four appeared to be having a good old time.

We just came back from a trip to Knoebel's Grove, a campground/amusement park in Central PA. It's the most awesome place ever if you like old time rides, some new fun ones, good cheap food, and free admission. It's not far from Bloomsburg, so there are amish people about. There was  a large group (10-12 or so) of Mennonite, I'm guessing, girls that seemed to be every place we were. The park is not that big. Our 18-year-old son was with us and they were definitely eyeing him up.  They wore bright colored dresses in an amishy style, flip flops (lol) headscarves, and were whipping out cell phones to take pics and selfies. They went on all the crazy rides and seemed to be having a blast. They were all cute, clean-scrubbed, and polite, but kept to themselves. Later on they met up with a group of young men dressed in jeans, polo and/or button down shirts, no hats. No elders in sight either. It was interesting. Kind of refreshing to see them out having fun, but also sad knowing that they are constrained so  much by religion.

[Lurky]

I grew up in a pretty liberal part of London, so was fundy-free until I went to uni, in a big Northern city in the UK.  And here I met my first fundies.  Well, by met, I was in the LGBT society, and they used to picket us - that kind of "met".  But my then-girlfriend's housemate (Lily) knew one of them from her course. 

This Fundy group was tiny - think 3 members, an older guy, one of those unfortunate-looking guys who clearly aren't out of their teens yet, and the girl, let's call her Alice - this was the one with the connection.  It was pretty sad actually - when not standing on the Students' Union steps yelling about sinners, Alice seemed on the verge of a nervous breakdown.  She truly believed that anything bad that happened to anyone was because she hadn't prayed enough.  So when Lily had the 'flu, Alice was all teary-apologetic that she hadn't stopped it, when another person got a bad mark on their course and so on.  At the time, I was torn between feeling super-sorry for her, because what an awful burden to carry, but also baffled by the idea of a god who'd punish someone like that so continually - and have the power to be so petty, but let people die of hunger, abuse, torture etc.

And then I met my current partner, and she's ex-Fundy, of the Vineyard persuasion.  She used to hang out with a goth Fundy crowd (we're talking 1990s) and there was so much WTFery about them, but I never met them, as of course she was cast out for having a girlfriend.  They were all dating each other, and used to live in a "boys' house" and a "girls' house" on the same street, with some hippy pagans I knew in between, who'd always hope to catch them going the wrong way in the mornings.

Oh the stories about goth-Funday-small-town-hypocrisy I've heard from my partner!  Endless, endless pettiness, gossip, "it's sin if YOU do it, but we're forgiven" - endless drama, sudden changes in doctrine, gossip, schisms, friendship explosions and so on.  Basically, adding the kind of religion you make up as you go along to people bored of their small town life and looking for excitement, and teenage hormones from the youth groups that only got worse into adulthood. 

[klynn]

Saw some likely IFB folks at Sam's Club over the weekend.  For those not familiar with Sam's, it's basically a Costco type store, owned by Wal Mart.  I like to buy bales of paper towels and tp there.  Anyway, there were 3 of them that I say, with 2 carts.  And you know those warehouse stores carts are like twice the size of normal carts.  The two women had the requisite long crunchy hair and long denim skirts.  Of course there was a man with them, protecting their hearts or whatever the hell they do.  They were freely handing out the evil eye.  So generous. 

As for door knockers, we haven't had any recently.  Last time I let my dog answer the door before I got there.  She's a breed that just so happens to be labelled (unfairly in my opinion) as dangerous/vicious/whatever.  She's actually a meatball on legs that would rather sleep in your lap, all 80 lbs of her, than do anything.  But, looks can be deceiving, and I may or may not let her answer JW and Mormon knocks on purpose.

[EmiGirl]

1 hour ago, klynn said:

Saw some likely IFB folks at Sam's Club over the weekend.  For those not familiar with Sam's, it's basically a Costco type store, owned by Wal Mart.  I like to buy bales of paper towels and tp there.  Anyway, there were 3 of them that I say, with 2 carts.  And you know those warehouse stores carts are like twice the size of normal carts.  The two women had the requisite long crunchy hair and long denim skirts.  Of course there was a man with them, protecting their hearts or whatever the hell they do.  They were freely handing out the evil eye.  So generous. 

As for door knockers, we haven't had any recently.  Last time I let my dog answer the door before I got there.  She's a breed that just so happens to be labelled (unfairly in my opinion) as dangerous/vicious/whatever.  She's actually a meatball on legs that would rather sleep in your lap, all 80 lbs of her, than do anything.  But, looks can be deceiving, and I may or may not let her answer JW and Mormon knocks on purpose.

Sounds lIke they could've been pentacostal too.

[GenerationCedarchip]

I don't know if the whole family was there, but at least some of the older Phillips children were in VA recently.  I was visiting friends with a lake house and while we were out and about, we ran into Faith and Liberty with folks that I think were family of Beall Phillips. Since I've not actually been introduced, I didn't go over and talk to them because I didn't want to be a creeper.  They seemed to be having fun, though. I think they're in their early 20s but they both looked closer to 30.

I was glad to see them out doing something fun. Because of some of the wacky things their parents have pushed, I tend to worry a bit about them.

Edited August 29, 2016 by GenerationCedarchip
hit enter too soon

[Leftitinmysnood]

I saw Esther Seppi out at the store unescorted today. I've almost gotten my blood pressure back down. (I have long past personal history with the family and she recently messaged me out of the blue inviting me to read their lovely blog about theonomy and reconstruction which she was sure I'd be interested in, since it appeared I had been blessed with a family.) I refrained from saying anything to her because I had kids with me and I really wanted to tell her off. I'm sure she didn't recognize me in my harlot attire. I didn't see their van in the lot, but there was a vehicle hawking essential oils in chalk on the windows. It might have been theirs, but it lacked a John Birch sticker.

 

[Stickboi]

I have another one. Probably not fundy; but it was definitely funny!

I have a medicinal marijuana card here in Ontario, Canada and like to smoke the occasional joint in a park nearby; which is one of the smaller parks here. Last night, this guy and girl came by the park  and they stood rather close by and chatted for a bit and then purposely walked closer to me to leave. The guy looked and dressed like an younger version of Jim Bob and gave me a really dirty look. The girl had a dress on and avoided eye contact with me. I should have done the polite thing and offered them a toke!

 

[Free2BeMe]

On 3/28/2016 at 9:03 PM, Season of life... said:

Most of my interactions with missionaries and JWs have been pleasant. I usually will listen politely, accept the Watchtower or whatever tract is offered, and if it's warm outside I'll offer bottled water. 

I hate to hurt feelings, and am rarely intentionally rude. Last summer, though, I let it rip, and although I'm ashamed to admit it, it felt pretty good.

My husband was returning home from Baskin-Robbins with ice cream. There is no mistaking the bag or contents.

I heard his car pull up, but he didn't come in the house. I opened the door to see my sweetheart, his back against the car, holding the bag in front of him like a shield. Three people, I believe JWs, were blocking him while standing extremely close and talking earnestly.

My husband was polite, yet obviously not receptive, and again, there was the pink and blue ice cream bag which they ignored.

I strode out, grabbed the bag and shook it at them. My husband and I headed inside, and they tried to follow. I shook the bag again and said, "NO! Bad, bad behavior!" (I had been working with our puppy who was a serial chewer).

They probably thought our souls were more important than ice cream, but when you live in the desert and it's summertime, it's a close call.

I would have come running out of the house like a bat out of hell screaming and flinging my arms around. Harassing an innocent like those JW's did is so out of line.

[Shouldabeenacowboy]

Oodles of Mennonite-like young men and women singing religious hymns at Dupont CIrcle in Washington DC yesterday. They tried to give us "Singing for Jeebus" tracts and CDs, but we politely but firmly declined. I'd rather they give them to someone who will use them, rather than us who'd immediately throw them in the bin.

Colorful prairie-style dresses but fitted and looking very well sewn, albeit from a distance (I know a thing or two about tailor-made clothes) and head coverings for the ladies, normal jeans and short-sleeved button-down shirts for the guys. 

Not my cuppa, but not the most offensive people around. Another time at the National Mall some crazies ran after us with Bibles in hand, trying to give us some. We almost got Bible-thumped, LOL.

In my years of living in the District, I have had my share of fundie encounters. Mostly putting up shows in front of the Supreme Court or at the National Mall, but occasionally roaming about town. 

Edited September 4, 2016 by Shouldabeenacowboy

[Granwych]

What really bugs me are the religious solicitors who haul their  little kids with them while proselytizing.  I hesitate to be rude to small children.

[Tim-Tom Biblethumper]

13 hours ago, Shouldabeenacowboy said:

Oodles of Mennonite-like young men and women singing religious hymns at Dupont CIrcle in Washington DC yesterday. They tried to give us "Singing for Jeebus" tracts and CDs, but we politely but firmly declined. I'd rather they give them to someone who will use them, rather than us who'd immediately throw them in the bin.

We almost got Bible-thumped, LOL.

Aren't Mennonites the "lite" version of Amish?  I've never heard of them proselytizing before.  Or they were just trying to sell their CD's?

13 hours ago, Granwych said:

What really bugs me are the religious solicitors who haul their  little kids with them while proselytizing.  I hesitate to be rude to small children.

The Wallers have admitted to using this strategy.  Although the kids aren't old enough to converse about it yet, I guess it makes them look sympathetic and David is less likely to get a tract thrown in his face.  

[Lurky]

17 hours ago, Granwych said:

What really bugs me are the religious solicitors who haul their  little kids with them while proselytizing.  I hesitate to be rude to small children.

A family friend used to teach - she was very obviously disabled from having polio as a child, and for some reason this attracted proselytisers to her like moths to a flame.  She was Quaker, and very good at getting rid of them, but she said it always broke her heart a little bit when it was JWs, as they'd always bring kids with them, and it was so often kids she'd taught.  She said it always really pained her, imagining what happened when they were dragged around to houses of their classmates - esp as they always looked so unhappy to be doing it.

[Swamptribe]

We were driving home yesterday and passed a truck hauling a trailer.  The white trailer was covered in slogans and sayings made of stick on letters.  The only one I could make out was a flow chart that read "God-Jesus-Man-Woman (on the bottom) followed by the words "What happened men?"

[klynn]

On 8/2/2016 at 11:43 PM, BlackberryGirl said:

BlackberryBoy, born in the South, described "Bless Your Heart" as "kindly contempt." perfect description..

 

My family is from LA and MS.  If my grandma ever said "bless your/their/her/his heart" it basically meant she thought they were a complete moron, or skank, or whatever.  It's definitely NOT a term of endearment .

[December]

On 9/16/2016 at 2:49 PM, klynn said:

My family is from LA and MS.  If my grandma ever said "bless your/their/her/his heart" it basically meant she thought they were a complete moron, or skank, or whatever.  It's definitely NOT a term of endearment .

Yeah, it's definitely a socially acceptable (wouldn't call it polite!) way to suggest someone is a complete f&*@#$& idiot. 

On 9/16/2016 at 7:59 AM, Swamptribe said:

We were driving home yesterday and passed a truck hauling a trailer.  The white trailer was covered in slogans and sayings made of stick on letters.  The only one I could make out was a flow chart that read "God-Jesus-Man-Woman (on the bottom) followed by the words "What happened men?"

If I'm reading that correctly...  

That's absolutely atrocious. And I'd bet if anyone complained to them about it, they'd be told to "lighten up" or something.  

[ladyamylynn]

I was in DC last weekend seeing the sights and ran across some rather nasty anti-abortion protesters yammering about how abortion is the new Holocaust and waving posters of dismembered fetuses. I exercised my first amendment rights by telling one of them to shut the fuck up.