If Your Wife Hates Sex, Don't Look At Her Face

[Deist woman]

Biblical Gender Roles Blog
Author: Imrlgoddess » Mon Oct 19, 2015 11:42 am
A Pagan friend of mine stumbled across this blog the other day, the post she found was on Disciplining the Wife, later she referenced the "Frustrated Feminist Wife".
link: biblicalgenderroles.com/2015/05/31/the-frustrated-feminist-wife/

I couldn't resist adding a comment, last I saw it was "awaiting moderation". I'm fairly certain he will not post it, as I made reference to a BDSM relationship and compared it to the dom/sub relationship he was describing.

For those interested this was my response:
sndivorcee69.tumblr.com/post/131470939452/the-blog

I'm sure a submissive role can be rewarding for some, it must work somewhere because it's done the world over. But I will always take issue with someone simplifying a woman's role in a stay at home situation...she's not a paid prostitute who cooks and cleans...she's a busy mom with needs of her own.

Top
Re: Biblical Gender Roles Blog
Author: laPapessaGiovanna » Wed Oct 21, 2015 10:13 am
Some time ago someone linked to it in Lori's thread and I fell in the rabbit hole. I can't stand that man, he is extremely ambiguous and only apparently logical in his ramblings. For example he claims that he doesn't advocate marital rape but the wife has to be always ready for her husband, he seems completely unable to see the contradiction. I wanted to snark about it on regular FJ but I had to stop reading there when I read him saying that non-physical dv nearly never happens and, if it happens, well in the Bible there's nothing against it, or something like that. I couldn't stand his bs anymore. I am glad you took the trouble to answer to his bs because I didn't have the stomach.

        
Re: Biblical Gender Roles Blog
Author: PregnantPornStar » Thu Oct 22, 2015 2:27 pm
laPapessaGiovanna wrote:Some time ago someone linked to it in Lori's thread and I fell in the rabbit hole. I can't stand that man, he is extremely ambiguous and only apparently logical in his ramblings. For example he claims that he doesn't advocate marital rape but the wife has to be always ready for her husband, he seems completely unable to see the contradiction. I wanted to snark about it on regular FJ but I had to stop reading there when I read him saying that non-physical dv nearly never happens and, if it happens, well in the Bible there's nothing against it, or something like that. I couldn't stand his bs anymore. I am glad you took the trouble to answer to his bs because I didn't have the stomach.
Yeah, the blog is one that really makes me want to leave planet earth. A friend shared it on FB a few months back. Anything that even suggests someone is required to be "submissive" makes me feel really gross.

Sorry if I overstepped, but I transferred this topic over from the Shelter because I thought the subject presents a rich mine of awfulness to be shared among us.  I have read several topics on his bog, but my mind is too traumatized to really address them right now.  I think the best, though, is the current topic
"How a husband can enjoy sex that is grudgingly given by his wife"

Quote

And, the answer is....
The secret of enjoying grudgingly given sex from your wife
Focus on your eyes on her body, not her face. Focus on the visual pleasure you receive from looking at her body and physical pleasure you receive from being inside your wife.
I know you love your wife, most of us as men love our wives. You want to connect with her physically AND emotionally during sex. But your wife is the one refusing to connect with you emotionally, so you have to concentrate 100% on the physical side.

 

[doggie]

•  

I know you love your wife, most of us as men love our wives. You want to connect with her physically AND emotionally during sex. But your wife is the one refusing to connect with you emotionally, so you have to concentrate 100% on the physical side.

in other words hump away like a horny dog and screw her she does not need to feel good. quality fundy sex right there. wonder if this is how jimbob does it?

[CyborgKin]

That's nothing less than sickening.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

This man never fails to provoke my rage. It's like reading something from an obscure theologian of Catholicism darkest ages, with the  exception that here it's always women's fault. 

[SaveJordyn]

Okay. What the HELL?! I just read the post that was linked and I am now physically ill.  What kind of "healthy" relationships does this man think he's preaching about?! My S/O and I have a perfectly healthy relationship and it includes give and take. I make slightly more money than he does but we share all of it, he cooks most nights (because he's better at it), I do laundry (because I like to), and we have a pretty normal amount of sex. If he wants to and I don't for whatever reason, we don't– and vice versa! How can anyone enjoy having sex with someone who isn't into it? I know neither of us would since a HUGE part of sex is emotional (for humans at least). I suppose now I'll have to read the post about doing it with your violated sex slave begrudging wife

Edited b/c too upset to spellcheck before posting

[polecat]

This blog is one of the biggest mashups of fundydom/MRA bullshit I've seen. I have hate-read it for a while since coming across it linked by one of the other idiot MRA blogs, but this one really brings all the crazy to the yard.

[JillsFlowerHeadband]

•  

I know you love your wife, most of us as men love our wives. You want to connect with her physically AND emotionally during sex. But your wife is the one refusing to connect with you emotionally, so you have to concentrate 100% on the physical side.

in other words hump away like a horny dog and screw her she does not need to feel good. quality fundy sex right there. wonder if this is how jimbob does it?

That's pretty much what it is... I would have said a rooster actually because those horny little buggers can run the hens ragged...

I wonder if anyone has ever told this guy "Hello, dude, we're humans and not animals"? Maybe they have and he just didn't listen. I asked Mr JFH for his thoughts on the blog post and he said "that's disgusting, guy needs to get a blowup doll because I wouldn't wish him on any woman." 

[doggie]

good addicting info has this on their website

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2015/10/26/dont-look-at-her-face-and-raping-your-wife-is-just-awesome-says-christian-website/

Don’t Look At Her Face And Raping Your Wife Is Just Awesome, Says Christian Website

[Deist woman]

I am so glad this was picked up and brought to wider attention!  I would love to see this guy pilloried in open discussion across the net.  He admits that he uses a false name for his blog because he doesn't want to face public censure for his disgusting beliefs.  Is there any way to make sure this blog doesn't get hidden in the future by this pus-bag?  (Whatever that way-back machine thing is I've heard about, maybe?).  If any of the FJ members happen to post oh his sites, I'd love to see it!

[PennySycamore]

Is it Rollo Tomassi or someone else who has the fictional name?  Rollo Tomassi was a fictional bad guy in James Elroy's LA Confidential (the film, too).  Why is the hell would you name yourself after a fictional murderous asshole?

[molecule]

A friend shared an article with me today that says the blog is fake: http://unsettledchristianity.com/a-word-of-caution-on-biblical-gender-roles/. Maybe this article isn't true, either, but I thought I'd pass it along.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

I read this in the Huffington Post this morning: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/if-your-wife-hates-sex-just-dont-look-at-her-face-says-christian-blogger_562fe79fe4b0c66bae59f710

Focus your eyes on her body, not her face. Focus on the visual pleasure you receive from looking at her body and physical pleasure you receive from being inside your wife.

I know you love your wife, most of us as men love our wives. You want to connect with her physically AND emotionally during sex. But your wife is the one refusing to connect with you emotionally, so you have to concentrate 100% on the physical side.

Larry Solomon, Christian blogger, says your wife owes you sex except  "in cases of illness, pain, family deaths “and other reasons like these.” Plain old not being in the mood, according to this guy, just doesn’t cut it."

I don't know why  they keep telling us that Christian Sex is the best sex!  This sounds downright nasty and I deeply pity any woman whose husband would rather concentrate on his pleasure than to figure out how to make his wife happy.

[notfundy]

I.  can't.   even.     Wow.     Yes, maybe try to figure out what's going on with that little woman of yours, huh, bub?  

[salex]

Larry Solomon seems to go to the same school of thought as Cabinetman, Ken and Michael Pearl.  

 

If only they had just found a nice blow up doll or living doll, their would be 4 women with better lives. 

 

Edited to add.  Larry Solomon is a pen name. He could well be Cabinet man or Ken..... 

ONe thing that is sure, if your wife hates sex, you are likely a crappy lover and I'm amazed you'd spread the news to the world.   Bu that is just me. 

 

 

[Handmaiden of Dog]

I was flabbergasted when I read this.  I thought I could not be shocked about any aspect of "Christian Sex on demand" but for a guy to write about how he concentrates on his wife's body and doesn't look at her face is jaw dropping.  You may as well admit you don't mind raping your wife because obviously only her body counts not her mind or her spirit.  Ugh!  These guys really get to me.  I wonder if his wife is "allowed" to read his blog and what she thinks.  Frankly this would make me want to make myself as unattractive as possible-- not wash or groom or diet.

[molecule]

I read today that this is fake. I'm looking for more information, but so far this is all I have: http://unsettledchristianity.com/a-word-of-caution-on-biblical-gender-roles/

[ILoveJellybeans]

But if you do that, why would she ever want to have sex with you in the future? Sex isn't an obligation or something people have to give you, and you certainly don't get sex by being passive aggressive about it. If he wants his wife to not hate having sex with him, he shouldn't make it more of a chore for her. He should try and work out what is going wrong and try new things to make it more fun for both of them.

Fundie sex sounds horrible.

[iweartanktops]

This is terrible! I don't understand why you would want to have sex with your partner when you know they don't feel like it! How is that attractive?? I've never turned my fiancé down before but if I did, I'm certain he would be happy to pass. I'm quite sure he wouldn't be turned on, knowing that I'm just "participating" so he can get off! Or that he would be okay with just focusing on me as a body rather than a human being and his partner. Gross! This is something I really don't understand about the fundie bull shit. 

 

[Cats B4 Quivers]

A good way to gauge if your partner wants to have sex with you: the person leaps happily towards you, clothes flying off in all directions. A "yee-haw" is nice but not necessary. Suggestions: have a great, consensual time.

A good way to gauge if your partner does not want to have sex with you:  the word "no", a grimace and the words "not today", or any other verbal or non-verbal communication that makes you continue cajoling and whining in an irritating manner. This all means no. Suggestions: take care of it yourself in another room. 

But really, the advice from that blogger was disgusting. Utterly disgusting. 

[Fascinated]

Whether it's fake or not, that's quite disturbing. I don't think there are too many men who would enjoy having sex with an unwilling partner.  I will go further, because I'm having a glass of wine, and say that I think most men actually derive most of their pleasure from their partner's, um, response.  I'm not a Degreed Sex Professional, though. 

I do love FJ. I read this wonderful thread title and thought: oh, yeah, that's my FJ. 

[doggie]

so doggie style would seem to be this sick bastard best way to go. really this idiot should stick to a fleshlight.

[closetcagebaby]

I hope this guy gets arrested for rape. I feel so awful for the violations his wife has obviously had to endure. 

[AngelGirl8811]

He must be a real fun guy at parties. If you disagree with him, he won't look at your face.

[Koala]

Somewhere Ken Alexander is mentally composing a guest post touting this "godly" man's advice for dealing with a difficult wife.  Wait for it...

[littlemommy]

I read this thread title and thought "Eww!" 

Then I had a momentarily thrill when I thought maybe Cabinetman had returned to the interwebs to spew his lunacy once again.