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A Saturday With the Moodys (Maxwells)


Talitha Cumi

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I'm absolutely hanging out for the next instalment Talitha Cumi. I realise it must take some time to recover from direct contact with Maxhell, but please, put down the Pepsi, turn off your heathen nursery rhymes, let your ceiling fans collect dust, defrost some burritos for dinner and schedule the time to write the next instalment of Saturday With The Moodys. Many will be blessed, hearts will be opened, gratitude will flow etc etc.

seconded! i'm trying to wait patiently, but my curiosity is just killing me

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If I hear what a great job Jesse has done one more time, I'm going to scream! Who cares? Jesse, Jesse, Jesse! Why all of a sudden is Jesse such a focal point? He's always lived mostly under a rock until now. Oh, wait, I do remember it was mentioned once that he had a guinea pig.

"All of us greatly were blessed". Homeschool fail strikes again.

Steve allowed a guinea pig? I'm really shocked.

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I think Steve is in la-la land about a lot of this stuff, but it is interesting to see where his mind is going.

Yes, his mind is definitely going. Or maybe gone.

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If Steve thinks God is going to get Melanie and NR Anna preggo in their 90s like Sarah and Abraham he is sorely mistaken.

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Do they always wear matching outfits? Thats kinda weird.

I've always thought it was strange too. The Maxwell daughters deserve to have an identity of their own. My daughter and I have a few "matching" tops and scarves, just because we both have similar taste. She goes to college in another state so it's unlikely we'd be seen together in them. When I visit her on campus, I'm careful not to even take any of those matching clothes. Also if I happen to buy something for myself that she already has I ask her "am I too old for this look?" Teri is not dressing too young for her age, but I think she and Steve are making their daughters dress much too old. A young woman can be modest and still have a young, fresh look.

About those modesty tops they wear under everything; what is the specific purpose of those? Is it to cover more skin along the neckline or to further blur the line of their womanly shape? Both? I can't imagine wearing that extra layer in August when the temps and humidity are so high.

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I've always thought it was strange too. The Maxwell daughters deserve to have an identity of their own. My daughter and I have a few "matching" tops and scarves, just because we both have similar taste. She goes to college in another state so it's unlikely we'd be seen together in them. When I visit her on campus, I'm careful not to even take any of those matching clothes. Also if I happen to buy something for myself that she already has I ask her "am I too old for this look?" Teri is not dressing too young for her age, but I think she and Steve are making their daughters dress much too old. A young woman can be modest and still have a young, fresh look.

About those modesty tops they wear under everything; what is the specific purpose of those? Is it to cover more skin along the neckline or to further blur the line of their womanly shape? Both? I can't imagine wearing that extra layer in August when the temps and humidity are so high.

I keep checking back for an update- anxiously awaiting the next installment :)

(first bold) I agree- I think they dress the daughters much too old- but I think that comes out of seclusion and not having peers state this (modest) item is more in style for a 20 something or teenager.

(second bold) Not sure but I have 2 theories: it is it keeps the chest warm as to not show nipples in cold air conditioning. That way there is 3 layers and less likely to happen. Also it goes up higher than the shirts so they are not showing anything below the collar bone. I get wearing shirts or tanks underneath shirts that are really low (I do it) but I don't get the one in the pink shirt (no idea their names- they all look alike) at the "Orlando’s Conference" post- that pink shirt was not that low- especially since she isn't very "blessed" and wouldn't be showing any cleavage without the modesty shirt.

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I keep checking back for an update- anxiously awaiting the next installment :)

(first bold) I agree- I think they dress the daughters much too old- but I think that comes out of seclusion and not having peers state this (modest) item is more in style for a 20 something or teenager.

(second bold) Not sure but I have 2 theories: it is it keeps the chest warm as to not show nipples in cold air conditioning. That way there is 3 layers and less likely to happen. Also it goes up higher than the shirts so they are not showing anything below the collar bone. I get wearing shirts or tanks underneath shirts that are really low (I do it) but I don't get the one in the pink shirt (no idea their names- they all look alike) at the "Orlando’s Conference" post- that pink shirt was not that low- especially since she isn't very "blessed" and wouldn't be showing any cleavage without the modesty shirt.

One thing I don't get about their style of dress is this -- the outer shirts that are low-cut -- how interesting that they have so many of these in the first place! As others have pointed out, one could just buy non-lowcut clothes in the first place, but that (at least when it comes to the Duggars, perhaps less so the Maxwells) removes the opportunity to talk constantly about how modest they are and how much work it is, how far they need to step away from the rest of the culture.

I tend to dress fairly modestly just because it fits my personal style, and I only have a few items that would need something under it -- I just have mostly non-low-cut tops.

I also can't help but think about them once they are courting and married -- the very fact that they *have* all these low-cut tops that they are so used to wearing layers underneath -- certainly they must experiment in the privacy of their own home with "how does this look with nothing else underneath it".

To me, wearing something low-cut with something higher under it, draws the eye to it and makes it easy to wonder "what would that look like without the underlayer" much more than simply wearing a higher-cut shirt in the first place. :snooty: :penguin-no:

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Will we get to read about the rest of your Energize! experience, Talitha Cumi? I'd LOVE to hear more about this!

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To me, wearing something low-cut with something higher under it, draws the eye to it and makes it easy to wonder "what would that look like without the underlayer" much more than simply wearing a higher-cut shirt in the first place. :snooty: :penguin-no:

Don't give Stevey boy any ideas!

His "children" look different enough without him enforcing even more stringent standards. They'd have to go back to wearing frumpers 24/7 because most 'modest' clothing still isn't modest enough for him (especially if you're just picking from what people donated to the thrift store)

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Will we get to read about the rest of your Energize! experience, Talitha Cumi? I'd LOVE to hear more about this!

Did all powerful(at least in his mind) Steve get Talitha Cumi?! :pink-shock:

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Did all powerful(at least in his mind) Steve get Talitha Cumi?! :pink-shock:

Perhaps we need to send out those rescue ferrets?

No snark, Talitha Cumi hasn't logged in here since Oct 1st. I hope she is OK.

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One thing I don't get about their style of dress is this -- the outer shirts that are low-cut -- how interesting that they have so many of these in the first place! As others have pointed out, one could just buy non-lowcut clothes in the first place, but that (at least when it comes to the Duggars, perhaps less so the Maxwells) removes the opportunity to talk constantly about how modest they are and how much work it is, how far they need to step away from the rest of the culture.

I tend to dress fairly modestly just because it fits my personal style, and I only have a few items that would need something under it -- I just have mostly non-low-cut tops.

I also can't help but think about them once they are courting and married -- the very fact that they *have* all these low-cut tops that they are so used to wearing layers underneath -- certainly they must experiment in the privacy of their own home with "how does this look with nothing else underneath it".

To me, wearing something low-cut with something higher under it, draws the eye to it and makes it easy to wonder "what would that look like without the underlayer" much more than simply wearing a higher-cut shirt in the first place. :snooty: :penguin-no:

I keep checking for an update but wanted to expound on CofD- I too dress fairly modestly (not Maxwell/duggar modest- normal Kohl's/lands end modest). I see no point in wearing 2 t-shirts - that much fabric would drive me nuts when it's summer and I live in a snow state- so I am used to layering .... when it's cold out but even then I wouldn't be layering 2 t-shirts because my arms would still be cold!!

I use tank tops under my outer shirts if they are too much of a V or a wrap shirt. I also will use a tank top as a layer for sheer material that a lot of dress shirts are made out of- but the tank tops are always the same color or a compliment not a gleaming white one that looks odd and out of place like that one picture. I will use a tank top on loose tops because I have a 2 year old that likes to pull open my shirts (she's growing out of it thankfully!), so I prefer someone see my tank top underneath instead of my bra and in this scenario- nobody sees my tank top- unless she pulls on my shirt. I'm babbling- I think we all seem to not like that the modesty shirts are screaming: "SEE HOW MODEST I AM BY MY MODEST SHIRT YOU CAN TELL IS A MODESTY SHIRT" when they don't make the shirts seem like it goes with the outfit, that is when it's in our face how holy and modest they are.

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Which means they are not modest and have misinterpreted biblical modesty.

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  • 1 month later...

You guys, I'm so sorry to have been gone so long! This fall kicked my ass, healthwise. That plus major personnel upheavals at work threw me for a loop. But no, Steve did not get me, and here we go with Teri's presentation!

This was the first time I saw Sarah, taking pictures. I keysmashed in my notes. :D

Teri started talking early, because then she could start the presentation on time. (DO NOT DEVIATE FROM THE SCHEDULE.) She said they're traveling with the unmarried children, and the married ones (including Joseph) are home. In their daily lives, she and the others are mostly at home, "just like you."

The session begins! "How to have an awesome day!" Who is awesome? You are, moms! What you do is more important and harder than being CEO of Google or Apple. What they do is straw, hay, and stubble as far as eternity is concerned. Also, "awesome" is the kids' word, but Teri likes it now.

Teri's life wasn't awesome when she was homeschooling; she was depressed and angry. Back then, "awesome" would have been someone taking the kids for a little while-- but then someone else would have been raising her kids! She quotes Romans 12:2-- "And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." Teri had to renew her mind to recognize that she was having awesome days. Her mind just wasn't doing it on its own. "In everything, give thanks." Praying without ceasing makes your day awesome. It's all in your mind.

A mom emails Teri: she's struggling, and is angry and upset, but she wants to be good. That's wrong thinking! "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!" That mom is just dwelling on her problems. Your child won't do schoolwork? Don't be upset, have hope and confidence! Your kids are up several times in the night, and you're exhausted and you want me time? Change your attitude! Me time is not Biblical; take up your cross and put others first. Teri gave up any thought of me time... but when she did, God gave her me time.

Practical ideas for awesome days:

1. Stay home. Things go more smoothly when you're home. Teri gives wives surveys on their schedules and activities, having them rate their kids 1 through 10 on behavior. The wives least satisfied with their lives and with the worst-behaved children are the ones who are away from home most. It's an amazing correlation! When you're not home, you can't keep up with your home responsibilities, and you can't help your children.

2. Schedule. When you have a schedule, you can see your accomplishments at the end of the day, just like the Maxwells can when they climb 14 kilometers to the top of a mountain on their (what some might call a) vacation in Colorado every year. It's hard, but they feel elated and exhilarated when they look back and see the results. A schedule is just like that! You don't have to get up at 4 am like they do when they climb the mountain, though.

One mom who sought Teri's advice felt like she was on a sinking ship. No one had any self-discipline. But once she scheduled, all the kids started responding to instruction and chores. They're saving money on housekeeping because now the kids are cleaning, and so is she! And her husband feels loved now, because the house is in order-- before, he felt like she didn't care.

You say scheduling is to hard? Let Teri tell you a little story! They went to the cemetery to visit family graves and put flags on them. Bethany picked up a clod of dirt and threw it at Auntie Mary. Teri told her to ask Mary for forgiveness, but Bethany refused, saying it was too hard. Teri warned her that if she didn't ask forgiveness, she wouldn't be allowed to put her flag on Susannah's grave. Noooo, said Bethany, it's too hard! No, what was hard was not getting to put her flag on the grave. For moms, not having a schedule is harder than making one! Here, check out Managers Of Their Homes. Isn't it great? Don't you want this? Of course you do!

3. Disciple your children. That may mean correcting and disciplining. Start out when they're young. Steve and Teri didn't with the three oldest, but did with the next five, and saw much better results. Now they're seeing results with the grandchildren.

Teri used to talk to the children and tell them why their behavior was wrong-- but the kids called the talks lectures! Oh no! What helped her was having an If-Then chart posted in the kitchen; she was able to be consistent. (At this point, Teri said something about not having been raised in a Christian home. Is that true? I don't remember anything about that.)

One lovely example of discipling a child happened when Teri was visiting one mom. One of the woman's little girls was running around making noise, and the mom got down on her level, held the little girl's face so their eyes met, smiled and said "Little ladies have little voices." Isn't that just great? Isn't it awesome?

4. Teach your children to work. Working is serving, but when mom does all the serving, the kids grow up spoiled and selfish. Have them work with you and serve each other!

Abigail has been working with Melanie since she was a toddler, folding laundry and sweeping with a tiny broom. She didn't squabble with her sibling because she was hard at work. At age 4, she had gotten good at sweeping, so she passed the chore on to the 2-year-old. When Abigail was 2, she was unloading the silverware from the dishwasher! She turned down reading time with Grandma Teri so she could go work in the kitchen. At Joseph's wedding, Melanie told everyone about how Abigail folded 6 loads of laundry so Mel could take a nap. Another day, Abigail made oven burritos while Mel rested, and then asked if she could go over to Chris and NR-Anna's house and make them dinner too. Abigail is having awesome days-- and so is Melanie!

In conclusion, awesome days are all in your mind. Teri knows of one woman who had a high level corporate job when she was in her 20s, and quit to teach 7th grade math. She said the kids who did best were the ones who had "grit" and never gave up. You need grit to have awesome days! Grit comes from Phil. 4:13-- "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." It's all in your mind. Don't let unawesome thoughts into your mind, and every day will be awesome!

Commercial: Hey moms, check out the Moody books! They contain positive role models and no negativity!

Up next, Steve talks about the physically energized family.

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You say scheduling is to hard? Let Teri tell you a little story! They went to the cemetery to visit family graves and put flags on them. Bethany picked up a clod of dirt and threw it at Auntie Mary. Teri told her to ask Mary for forgiveness, but Bethany refused, saying it was too hard. Teri warned her that if she didn't ask forgiveness, she wouldn't be allowed to put her flag on Susannah's grave. Noooo, said Bethany, it's too hard! No, what was hard was not getting to put her flag on the grave. For moms, not having a schedule is harder than making one! Here, check out Managers Of Their Homes. Isn't it great? Don't you want this? Of course you do!

:shock: :shock: :shock:

That just sounds so unbelievably wrong. Nothing should stop Bethany being able to put a flag on the grave of her dead big sister :( Even if they never met, its just awful to threaten to take that away from her.

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I am just all kinds of angry over this. Poor Abigail! How hold is she? Six or seven? Why in the world is she folding SIX loads of laundry while her mothers naps? And making dinner? Unsupervised? Seriously?!?

And to use their deceased sister's grave as punishment/incentive is just cruel. Maybe Bethany was acting out because she was at a cemetery and being forced to view her dead sister's grave when she has no idea what that all meant. Maybe the situation was beyond her comprehension and she was completely uncomfortable and so acted out? Geesh, Steve? If we had any doubt that the sick control continued into another generation, we have none now.

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One lovely example of discipling a child happened when Teri was visiting one mom. One of the woman's little girls was running around making noise, and the mom got down on her level, held the little girl's face so their eyes met, smiled and said "Little ladies have little voices." Isn't that just great? Isn't it awesome?

WHAT.

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At this point, Teri said something about not having been raised in a Christian home. Is that true? I don't remember anything about that.

Teri and Steve were born again after they'd already met - in COLLEGE.

I suspect Teri was raised "default American culturally Christian" (i.e. not explicitly some other religion) but doesn't consider her upbringing to be particularly "Christian" from where she stands now.

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At Joseph's wedding, Melanie told everyone about how Abigail folded 6 loads of laundry so Mel could take a nap.

OK Terrie, I'm calling shenanigans on this. 6 loads of laundry while Mel napped? That would mean:

1) There were 6 loads of cleaned, dry laundry sitting in baskets waiting to be folded. Yeah right. No doubt these keepers of their homes would be leaving laundry in baskets to get wrinkled up. :snooty:

2) That Abigail did 6 drier loads of laundry in succession, which would take 3-6 hours, depending on model. Yeah right. No keeper of her home gets a 3-6 hr nap.

3) She folded one load of laundry, while Melanie napped or she folded 6 loads throughout the day, during most of it Melanie would not be napping.

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OK Terrie, I'm calling shenanigans on this. 6 loads of laundry while Mel napped? That would mean:

1) There were 6 loads of cleaned, dry laundry sitting in baskets waiting to be folded. Yeah right. No doubt these keepers of their homes would be leaving laundry in baskets to get wrinkled up. :snooty:

2) That Abigail did 6 drier loads of laundry in succession, which would take 3-6 hours, depending on model. Yeah right. No keeper of her home gets a 3-6 hr nap.

3) She folded one load of laundry, while Melanie napped or she folded 6 loads throughout the day, during most of it Melanie would not be napping.

Teri does not say how big the loads are. They may have been six white t-shirts in one, 10 red socks in the other, etc. :dance:

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