Everly Unpleasant Whiplash

[wtylcf]

I have a new hate-crush: Ms. Everly Pleasant. I described a few posts on her blog in the thread on Kindred Grace, formerly known as YLCF.

The post in question is a perfect example of what I'd like to call whiplash-posting. You are in the car on a ride with Ms. Everly and she's driving. You're chatting about how you both agree that people who instagram their perfect lives of pretty dresses and nice food are kind of ridiculous. You ask how far away the mall is; you've passed the exit where you thought you would get off, if you were going to the mall. You are convinced you remember Everly inviting you out to go shopping for some dresses and to eat a piece of pizza at the food court. "Oh no, we're going to the crisis pregnancy centre for my volunteer shift," she says. "We have to save the unborn babies!" You grip the edge of your seat with white knuckles as your head whips back to the missed exit. WTF? You think to yourself. I don't remember this part of the conversation! I was just chatting with this nice, normal girl and having a good time! Do I have amnesia?!

So the abortion issue is upfront in this particular post, but read down to the end of the post and see if she doesn't have you convinced that she makes total sense by the last couple of paragraphs. Then scroll backwards to encounter the following admittedly hyperbolic statements to remember how WTF?! she is in the FIRST part of the post:

And the other thing I do on the Internet-I judge people. Every day I fall into the sin of judgement while online.

She is a cool because look at that picture she instagrammed of her garden. She’s so mellow and calm as she plants that asparagus, she must be at some great peace with the Lord.

She is stupid. She just tweeted about sports three times in a row. There’s so much more to life than sports. She’s just making a fool of herself. Who cares anyway? Not me.

He’s totally right. Everyone should recycle. If you don’t recycle, you don’t care about the environment. Don’t they know that God gave us the earth to steward and care for? Gee!

Oh, I thought I liked this person. Never. Mind. Their kids go to public school. Yuck. If you want the government polluting your children’s minds and molding them into factory workers for you, go back to Prussia.

These thoughts are slightly exaggerated. Keyword: slightly.

BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE JUST GOING TO THE MALL, EVERLYYYY...

(should I tell her I went to public school? OMG. Does she even know that Prussia isn't a country and hasn't been a recognized entity since 1947? Damn, and I was so looking forward to drinking an Orange Julius.)

everlypleasant.com/?p=1762

also, is "she is a cool" intentional? If it is, it's hilarious.

[Raptured_Pope]

From the same post: "You would read about me on my blog and on my Facebook page and be jealous, feel guilty about your own weaknesses and end up hating me for being the person you never could be."

No, Everly, we read your blog and FB page and just laugh. And snark. And know that at some point you, too, will be faced with something in your life outside of your bubble of convenience that really matters and then we pray you will meet the challenge with grace and humility.

Dang.

[merrily]

And the Bible says nothing about using the Internets. Or abusing it.

[GenerationCedarchip]

Every time I read her blog, I think to myself that in a few years (I hope), she's going to be mortified by the thought patterns of her 20 year old self.

Either that or she's going to grow up to be Jennie Chancey. :doh:

[erunerune]

Her blog is a good reminder of why I plan to e.m.p.h.a.s.i.z.e. to mini-erunerune why broadcasting one's opinions online, particularly when young and inexperienced, will only result in a lifetime of cringing regret. Off-topic, I don't know why she bothers with the pseudonym, since her real name is pretty freaking obvious (I wasn't even trying to find it, that's how obvious).

I mean, I still cringe at things I said/did when I was 20, but that was back in the dark ages and I'm pretty sure no one else remembers or cares at this point. It would be 10x worse if my ridiculousness was still floating around the aether humiliating me decades after the fact. THANK YOU LACK OF WIDESPREAD INTERNET IN THE 90's!

[spinsterwv]

I’m reading through her Facebook posts, her blog posts, her tweets. I’m seeing all of the things we agree on, all of the ways our theology aligns, all of the similarities. And yet, something is missing. Why in all of her caring does she not mention abortion? I can’t help but think it

Ok, she's girl-crushing on this chick who has some common viewpoints. Maybe she wants to be friends. Holy hell, can't she be friends with someone who is probably against abortion, just not batshit crazy about it? Wow, talk about living in a bubble! I have friends with all sorts of interests. I talk about spinning and yarn with one friend, preparedness and growing vegetables with my wingnutty friend, politics with my fundy supervisor (we love the debate) and so forth. They don't have a litmus test, unless you consider decent people who treat others respectfully to be a test.

Sheesh.

She's definitely a favorite snark subject. She's about a self-righteous as Mazzou.

[wtylcf]

Ok, she's girl-crushing on this chick who has some common viewpoints. Maybe she wants to be friends. Holy hell, can't she be friends with someone who is probably against abortion, just not batshit crazy about it? Wow, talk about living in a bubble! I have friends with all sorts of interests. I talk about spinning and yarn with one friend, preparedness and growing vegetables with my wingnutty friend, politics with my fundy supervisor (we love the debate) and so forth. They don't have a litmus test, unless you consider decent people who treat others respectfully to be a test.

Sheesh.

She's definitely a favorite snark subject. She's about a self-righteous as Mazzou.

She definitely fails to consider that some people don't want to engage in polarizing subjects on facebook. I mean, if your entire circle of friends on FB is an echo chamber of people who share exactly your religious beliefs, I suppose it wouldn't be a big deal. But for some of us, myself included, any post championing a political cause or a religious opinion would piss off about 1/3 of my friends. Sure, you can call this being wimpy or not standing up for one's beliefs, but I prefer to try to get along with many people from various walks of life, even if we don't completely agree on everything. I hope Everly evolves in her opinions on this stuff as she gets older (I know I did).

[Black Aliss]

I mean, I still cringe at things I said/did when I was 20, but that was back in the dark ages and I'm pretty sure no one else remembers or cares at this point. It would be 10x worse if my ridiculousness was still floating around the aether humiliating me decades after the fact. THANK YOU LACK OF WIDESPREAD INTERNET IN THE 90's!

Yes, those of us who were part of the small internet world of 1990 can find plenty of cringe-worthy stuff that we posted under our !real names! if we care to look.

[guidedbybobafett]

"You would read about me on my blog and on my Facebook page and be jealous, feel guilty about your own weaknesses and end up hating me for being the person you never could be."

Oh man, Everly is one deluded little ray of sunshine, isn't she.

[Carla Bruni]

"You would read about me on my blog and on my Facebook page and be jealous, feel guilty about your own weaknesses and end up hating me for being the person you never could be."

What the actual fuck.

Oh, you donate to ministries in Haiti? Fuck you. You're a part of the problem. A giant part of it. Ministries are the LAST thing Haiti needs. Of course, having never been to Haiti (or school, where you would have learned about development and economics and poverty and the history of missionaries to "dark places" holding societies back centuries), you wouldn't know this. Also, forced Christianization has worked so well around the world. Just look at Africa.

My best photo from Haiti, a place that absolutely tore my heart to shreds (and I've been to refugee camps), was of a giant pile of donated clothes (from these very ministries that are blocking the development of Haitian private enterprise and textile manufacturing) in Port-au-Prince's main landfill-slash-market. You've got pigs (very cute, but still) eating trash to the left, bitches prancing around in fundie dresses to the right, and Haitians sorting through the donations in the center, all in front of a truck with "Dieu qui donne" (God who gives) painted on it in giant letters. When I asked about the fundies, our local staff turned bright red and started muttering very angrily in unprintable quebecois, and these are people who love Haiti. :evil:

[wtylcf]

What the actual fuck.

Oh, you donate to ministries in Haiti? Fuck you. You're a part of the problem. A giant part of it. Ministries are the LAST thing Haiti needs. Of course, having never been to Haiti (or school, where you would have learned about development and economics and poverty and the history of missionaries to "dark places" holding societies back centuries), you wouldn't know this. Also, forced Christianization has worked so well around the world. Just look at Africa.

My best photo from Haiti, a place that absolutely tore my heart to shreds (and I've been to refugee camps), was of a giant pile of donated clothes (from these very ministries that are blocking the development of Haitian private enterprise and textile manufacturing) in Port-au-Prince's main landfill-slash-market. You've got pigs (very cute, but still) eating trash to the left, bitches prancing around in fundie dresses to the right, and Haitians sorting through the donations in the center, all in front of a truck with "Dieu qui donne" (God who gives) painted on it in giant letters. When I asked about the fundies, our local staff turned bright red and started muttering very angrily in unprintable quebecois, and these are people who love Haiti. :evil:

Oooh, you might be interested in Everly's adventures in Haiti (where she did go...and probably acted as arrogantly as you might imagine). She posted on Kindred Grace that Haitian orphans called her a traitor and hurt her feelings (seriously) kindredgrace.com/words-that-wound/. The second link is about her adoption story, a wall of text so high I have not been able to scale it in its entirety, but it seems to be mostly about her, not about the actual kids being adopted. They were in Haiti for 8 months in total, she says. everlypleasant.com/?page_id=96

Ms. Bruni, you are the only person I know in any of my social circles who has gone to Haiti and is not a missionary. While I thought those people I knew of who did the trendy "2 weeks in Haiti" service trip after the earthquake were well intentioned but possibly misguided, your info casts the organizations who do this work in a more sinister light. Thank you for your service to humanity, seriously.

[dianapavelovna]

Oooh, you might be interested in Everly's adventures in Haiti (where she did go...and probably acted as arrogantly as you might imagine). She posted on Kindred Grace that Haitian orphans called her a traitor and hurt her feelings (seriously) kindredgrace.com/words-that-wound/. The second link is about her adoption story, a wall of text so high I have not been able to scale it in its entirety, but it seems to be mostly about her, not about the actual kids being adopted. They were in Haiti for 8 months in total, she says. everlypleasant.com/?page_id=96

Ms. Bruni, you are the only person I know in any of my social circles who has gone to Haiti and is not a missionary. While I thought those people I knew of who did the trendy "2 weeks in Haiti" service trip after the earthquake were well intentioned but possibly misguided, your info casts the organizations who do this work in a more sinister light. Thank you for your service to humanity, seriously.

I just read the whole thing and it was incomprehensible. SOTDRT at its finest. Also lots of fundie xenophobia and self-righteousness. Some highlights:

There was a Haitian pastor there whom we loved. I will call him J.F.

He was a wonderful, sweet man with a heart for these children. But as time passed, the power of owning the orphanage went to his head. This is a tendency for Haitians. Power and wealth leads them to become wicked.

O YAH, MAN, that only happens to those crazy Haitians!!

Another thing I had never seen first hand was spiritual warfare. I am here to tell you that it is as real as you are. Angels are living, real beings. And, unfortunately, so are demons. You could feel the prayers of our friends and family from America. I thank God that we could feel them. If we couldn’t, I don’t know if we could’ve made it. We could also feel the demons using everyway they could to keep us from adopting those children and taking them into a Christian family. Every one hundred years the president of Haiti dedicates the country to the devil. What could be a better (according to the demons) place for these children to grow up? Well, the angels were there too. We could feel them every time a paper got signed or another step of one of the adoptions was completed.

Just...... :think:

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

I have a new hate-crush: Ms. Everly Pleasant. I described a few posts on her blog in the thread on Kindred Grace, formerly known as YLCF.

The post in question is a perfect example of what I'd like to call whiplash-posting. You are in the car on a ride with Ms. Everly and she's driving. You're chatting about how you both agree that people who instagram their perfect lives of pretty dresses and nice food are kind of ridiculous. You ask how far away the mall is; you've passed the exit where you thought you would get off, if you were going to the mall. You are convinced you remember Everly inviting you out to go shopping for some dresses and to eat a piece of pizza at the food court. "Oh no, we're going to the crisis pregnancy centre for my volunteer shift," she says. "We have to save the unborn babies!" You grip the edge of your seat with white knuckles as your head whips back to the missed exit. WTF? You think to yourself. I don't remember this part of the conversation! I was just chatting with this nice, normal girl and having a good time! Do I have amnesia?!

So the abortion issue is upfront in this particular post, but read down to the end of the post and see if she doesn't have you convinced that she makes total sense by the last couple of paragraphs. Then scroll backwards to encounter the following admittedly hyperbolic statements to remember how WTF?! she is in the FIRST part of the post:

BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE JUST GOING TO THE MALL, EVERLYYYY...

(should I tell her I went to public school? OMG. Does she even know that Prussia isn't a country and hasn't been a recognized entity since 1947? Damn, and I was so looking forward to drinking an Orange Julius.)

everlypleasant.com/?p=1762

also, is "she is a cool" intentional? If it is, it's hilarious.

Just want to say thanks for a much-needed laugh! :lol: :lol: :lol:

[julie paradox]

Every one hundred years the president of Haiti dedicates the country to the devil.

Okay, Everly, even if one assumes that you are correct in your judgement of this situation (I'm not sure I can get this assumption out of the door):

what does the president think they are doing?

Because as far as I'm aware there isn't a country in the world that officially worships "the devil".

[GenerationCedarchip]

Okay, Everly, even if one assumes that you are correct in your judgement of this situation (I'm not sure I can get this assumption out of the door):

what does the president think they are doing?

Because as far as I'm aware there isn't a country in the world that officially worships "the devil".

Re: Haiti and the Devil (and I thought I'd never use that Govt/Politics of Developing Nations course I took in college!): Back in the 1700s, when Haiti revolted, there was a persistent rumor started that the rebels dedicated the country to Satan. The French just couldn't comprehend that the "savages" they governed could possibly depose their Great White Overlords otherwise.

The rumors never entirely went away and they got more currency in the early 1990s because the president of Haiti declared voodoo Haiti's official religion. This was seen by some as a dedication of the country to the devil. Pat Robertson went on a completely wacked out rant on TV at some point talking about Haiti's historical alliance with Satan and that rant has been republished as "history" in more than a few fundie history publications - which is where I suspect Everly got her info.

[last_one_picked]

I'm confused. "Go back to Prussia." Does she mean Russia? Is hating on Prussia the new Fundie Thing now?

[erunerune]

I'm more confused about how one goes about dedicating a country to the devil. Must one be President to have such powers? And is 100 years the normal term, or is that negotiable? Is there an "undo" button for this arrangement, or must one wait until the agreed-upon period of time has expired?

Editing to add that the "Prussia" reference was likely just SOTDRT geography/history/all other types of education fail. I suppose she could have intended it ironically, but we're more likely to discover a farm of rainbow unicorns than see a fundie successfully pull off an ironic statement intentionally.

[Carla Bruni]

Oooh, you might be interested in Everly's adventures in Haiti (where she did go...and probably acted as arrogantly as you might imagine). She posted on Kindred Grace that Haitian orphans called her a traitor and hurt her feelings (seriously) kindredgrace.com/words-that-wound/. The second link is about her adoption story, a wall of text so high I have not been able to scale it in its entirety, but it seems to be mostly about her, not about the actual kids being adopted. They were in Haiti for 8 months in total, she says. everlypleasant.com/?page_id=96

Ms. Bruni, you are the only person I know in any of my social circles who has gone to Haiti and is not a missionary. While I thought those people I knew of who did the trendy "2 weeks in Haiti" service trip after the earthquake were well intentioned but possibly misguided, your info casts the organizations who do this work in a more sinister light. Thank you for your service to humanity, seriously.

I can take absolutely no credit and accept no gratitude - I just happen to work for a company that helps other companies and organizations do some really excellent work in Haiti :) I have no problem with well-intentioned people doing good - if they brought medicine, water sanitation tablets, civil engineering specialists, etc along with them on their trendy trip, more power to them. If they helped reconstruct something - or, better yet, brought money to pay locals to reconstruct something, or brought money to pay locals to lend out to other locals to reconstruct something - that's fine. It's the proselytizing that kills me - not just in Haiti, of course, everywhere, but Haiti has SO many problems even compared to some of the underdeveloped parts of Africa that this type of shit is literally crushing an already broken system.

A tiny soapbox tangent related to fundies: any charity that donates shoes/clothes/etc to "poor countries" is to be avoided like the plague (a good, short explanation is offered here: http://goodintents.org/in-kind-donations/toms-shoes). Fundies LOVE this shit, and they're killing the local economy everywhere they go. In Haiti it's particularly terrible because it's just piles upon piles upon piles of clothes at a giant landfill, so any Haitian who decided to open up a textile manufacturing facility or even a locally-made clothing stall (that would pay other Haitians, which would, in turn, give them the means to feed their families and send their children to school, in the process of which they would pay other Haitians for goods and services, and the cycle would continue) is automatically SOL.

But back to Everly: I made it through the entirety of that verbal diarrhea on my commute and I have to say, the xenophobia and White Man's Burden hysteria aside, I'm a little bit amazed at how little they accomplished in 8 months. What was it that they actually DID? Did they literally just sit around and wait for their adoption documents to be processed (five bucks says they totally paid someone off to get it done, which is not only immoral, but also a violation of U.S. law)?

According to her story, this was all going down during the ousting of Aristide, which was in 2004 - a totally chaotic time for Haiti, even by modern standards. Pervasive corruption, no law enforcement, no government oversight (least of all in areas of adoption), the U.S. embassy processing adoption visas with their eyes closed, the list continues. In light of this, an additional five bucks says that many of the kids at that orphanage, possibly including the kids they adopted, could have been restaveks (child slaves) sold to orphanages that turned a hefty profit on adoption deals with White Saviors. In other words, not orphans at all, but rather children taken from illiterate mothers who had been duped into giving up their kids, as is typically the case with restaveks. Did they do any research into where these kids came from? I presume not.

I basically hate everything about her. :evil-eye:

[wtylcf]

Carla Bruni (it is giving me cognitive dissonance to type that), thanks for the information about TOMS shoes-type programs; I had never considered they might have this effect. Thanks for the education.

Now, when I eventually read her adoption screed, I will be better informed - not that I would have really believed Haiti is dedicated "to the devil" or any of that nonsense, but about how her tale is completely uninformed by any meaningful political and social context, which you've provided here.

[Megan]

Thank you so much for mentioning TOM'S. I tried explaining that problem to someone when I was in college and got blank stares. The solution is so obvious - use the money that you would have spent making and shipping the shoes to hire local shoemakers to make the shoes and then have them donated! and you'd actually provide more shoes to people and help the local economy.

[LucySnowe]

Was about to post this in the 'Kindred Grace - Childless Spinsters R Us' thread, then noted the author and figured I should put it here.

kindredgrace.com/singleness-is-not-a-disease/

I am single, but that’s not keeping me from living my life. As a matter of fact, and I don’t just say this to make you and I feel better, singleness enables a more active life. Even if I’m not actively in the dating game, I’m active in many areas. My last year has been a full one. I’ve been able to work, volunteer, pitch a book, attend conferences, create personal challenges and reach personal goals and spend a lot of time and energy on my family and friends. It’s been rich and I didn’t need a boyfriend or husband to make it so.

She's claiming that she has a 'more active life' because of being single, yet I have done everything in that list (including pitching a book) in the past year, and still managed to devote quite a lot of time to my husband. No, I didn't need a husband to make my life rich, but it's ridiculous to imply that you can only have that kind of life when you're single.

I freely admit to loathing this kind of thinking regardless of who's expressing it. Yes, being single means you can sit up on the sofa till 2am and eat ice cream out of the carton. But you can do that if you're married, too.

Also, would you say 'to make I feel better'? Then why say 'to make you and I feel better'? :x

[lizziesmom]

I don't know about the whiplash. She does tell you in the very first sentence that she is judgmental and that she judges people on the internet every day. Of course, she came to the party with a bias against the ebil government so it doesn't surprise me that she went on a rant against public schools.

[rward]

"You would read about me on my blog and on my Facebook page and be jealous, feel guilty about your own weaknesses and end up hating me for being the person you never could be."

Oh man, Everly is one deluded little ray of sunshine, isn't she.

So I looked at this and blinked for a bit, then I decided to check out her blog.

Oh, honey, no.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

I'm confused. "Go back to Prussia." Does she mean Russia? Is hating on Prussia the new Fundie Thing now?

:lol: :lol: :lol: Oh Dang! I am so out of the loop. Does this mean I have to throw away my Prussian Blue paint?

[Raptured_Pope]

:lol: :lol: :lol: Oh Dang! I am so out of the loop. Does this mean I have to throw away my Prussian Blue paint?

Well, given when her homeschooling textbooks were probably published, Prussia may have still been a country then. Ya never know.