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Found 132 results

  1. I've been wondering about this for a while. Fundie Erika wrote a blog post about christian approved books written by Christians. Can we find any secular authors who write books that could get fundie approved? What rules do you think they would need to follow? Rules I'm thinking of: no sex no swearing no immoral relationships
  2. The old thread got too long, so let's start a new one! What are YOU reading now? Anything good? Anything to avoid?
  3. Ah, My Lady Bibliophile. A homeschool graduate with remarkably good grammar compared to some of the fundies we snark on, and yet her reading comprehension skills wouldn't pass muster on the Ontario Secondary School Literacy Test. She reads and reviews (or sometimes just reviews) all manner of books to guide her followers towards godly fiction and away from dangerous stories. I'm personally a fan of her Austen reviews, such as this one for Northanger Abbey which fails to mention that Henry Tilney is appalled at the way men in his culture treat women as playthings or this one for Sense and Sensibility that claims "Jane Austen has been slandered as a great feministic propagandist of the 19th century", while @Showtunesgirl has recently pointed me to this review for The Hunger Games, in which MLB acknowledges she hasn't actually read the books, but she read a synopsis, so that's good enough (SPOILER: It's not good enough. She's totally wrong about parents "entering" their kids in a lottery. There's no choice. Kids are in the lottery, and if you object you all get shot). Enjoy the rabbit hole here: http://ladybibliophile.blogspot.co.uk/ ETA: Could someone please help me figure out how to tag this topic? I read the instructions in the FAQ and I can't find a tag field :[
  4. If you were anything like me as a teen or tween (i.e., a chronically uncool and sheltered), then you probably read "Go Ask Alice," the diary of an anonymous teen girl in the 1960s who spiraled into sex, drugs, and rock and roll, and then died shortly after writing the final entry: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_Ask_Alice However, it's quite clear now that "Alice" never existed, and the entire story was concocted by Beatrice Sparks, a Mormon youth counselor, who made a cottage industry of "finding" diaries written by wayward teenagers and publishing them, ostensibly as scared straight tales: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beatrice_Sparks As this article details, the kids who were/are most likely to read books like "Go Ask Alice" aren't going to be the ones in the hardcore drug scene, but goodie-goodies wanting a vicarious thrill without any of the real-life dangers (like me): https://www.bustle.com/articles/29829-go-ask-alice-is-still-awash-in-controversy-43-years-after-publication When I read the book as a middle schooler, I was positive "Go Ask Alice" was real. Today, I realize that the whole thing reads more like an episode of Dragnet than an authentic account of drug use. As a presumably squeaky-clean Mormon, my assumption is that she got her notions about drugs from places like TIME, Newsweek, Life magazine, and probably also the afore-mentioned Dragnet. Given how many fake diaries Sparks found time to write, I have to wonder where she found time to do face to face counseling. However, "Go As Alice" has never been out of print in more than forty years, which is not an insignificant feat, maybe I need to get in on the fake scared straight diary scam. ETA This site lists examples of paragraphs that no real teenage girl could have ever written, and now I feel even stupider than twelve year old me didn't realize how fake "Go Ask Alice is": http://the-toast.net/2014/04/25/fake-lines-from-go-ask-alice/
  5. Just FYI for interested parties, 'Biblical Womanhood in the Home' is free for Kindle Unlimited folks to read on Amazon right now. I just downloaded my copy. I am afraid of what it is going to do to my suggestion algorithm. So is 'Living Virtuously: A Wife's Complete Guide to Keeping Her Heart and Home' by Erin Harrison. And 'Girl Power, God's Way:Living Out Biblical Womanhood' by Angela Parsley And the very creepily titled 'Daddy Daughter: 10 Date Nights Designed to Teach Biblical Womanhood'.
  6. I'm an avid reader, fiction, non-fiction, historical, urban fantasy, crime novels, horror, etc. If you do too maybe enough of us to get a book club going! I'd love it.
  7. I'm always looking for a good book by former members of the FLDS and other groups of Fundamental Mormonism, and it seems like I'm always missing some. So I thought, with the help of fellow FJers, we could compile a list? I'll start with all the ones I know, then I'd love for others to have a running list, especially as new books are released. Escape - Carolyn Jessop Stolen Innocence: My Story of Growing Up in a Polygamist Sect, Becoming a Teenage Bride, and Breaking Free of Warren Jeffs - Elissa Wall Lost Boy - Brent W. Jeffs Under the Banner of Heaven: A Story of Violent Faiths - Jon Krakauer Prophet's Prey: My Seven-Year Investigation into Warren Jeffs and the Fundamentalist Church of Latter-Day Saints - Sam Brower Triumph - Carolyn Jessop The Witness Wore Red: The 19th Wife Who Brought Polygamous Cult Leaders to Justice - Rebecca Musser Church of Lies - Flora Jessop When Men Become Gods: Mormon Polygamist Warren Jeffs, His Cult of Fear, and the Women Who Fought Back - Stephen Singular Shattered Dreams: My Life as a Polygamist's Wife - Irene Spencer Answer Them Nothing: Bringing Down the Polygamous Empire of Warren Jeffs - Debra Weyermann Secrets and Wives: The Hidden World of Mormon Polygamy - Sanjiv Bhattacharya Cult Insanity: A Memoir of Polygamy, Prophets, and Blood Atonement - Irene Spencer The Sound of Gravel - Ruth Wariner Predators, Prey, and Other Kinfolk: Growing Up in Polygamy - Dorothy Allred Solomon Love Times Three: Our True Story of a Polygamous Marriage - Joe Darger Keep Sweet: Children of Polygamy - Debbie Palmer His Favorite Wife: Trapped in Polygamy - Susan Ray Schmidt God's Brothel: The Extortion of Sex for Salvation - Andrea Moore-Emmett Saints Under Siege: The Texas Stat Raid on the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints - Stuart A. Wright Illegitimate: How A Loving God Rescued a Son of Polygamy Daughter of the Saints: Growing Up in Polygamy by Dorothy Allred Solomon The Secret Lives of Saints: Child Brides and Lost Boys in a Polygamous Mormon Sect - Daphne Bramham Daughters of Zion: A Family's Conversion to Polygamy - Kim Taylor The Fourth Wife: Polygamy, Love, & Revolution - Carolyn O'Bagy Davis What Peace There May Be: A Memoir - Susanna Barlow Inside the World of Warren Jeffs - Carole Western Seventeen Sisters: Tell Their Story - Barbara Barlow and Virginia Webb Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage - Kody Brown, Meri Brown, Janelle Brown, Christine Brown, and Robyn Brown The Blood Covenant - Rena Chynoweth Fictional books: The 19th Wife - David Ebershoff Keep Sweet - Michelle Dominguez Greene The Righteous - Michael Wallace Desert Wives - Betty Webb The Chosen One - Carol Lynch Williams Hidden Wives - Claire Avery Torn by God: A Family's Struggle with Polygamy - Zoe Murdock The Lonely Polygamist - Brady Udall Sister Wife - Shelley Hrdlitschka I'm sure I'm missing some, if not a bunch?
  8. So I just finished Me Before You by JoJo Moyes. I thought it had an odd beginning, and I was kind of confused by some of the British terminology and way of doing this - job referral centers and retraining and whatnot. It wasn't a terrible story but I haven't decided how I feel yet. Anybody else read it? I put a hold on the sequel from the library so I want to read that, too. What did you think? Or hell, even if you saw the movie... what do you think?
  9. The book has 205 pages, followed by a couple pages that include a poem by Ken and a small "About the Author" section. It contains nineteen chapters, the titles of which I will list at the end of this first entry. The dedication reads: "To those women who dreamed of having a close and intimate marriage only to find out that their marriage was more like a nightmare." That's it. No promise of encouragement within the pages of the book, no note of thanks that they are trusting her to guide them. Of course, no mention of her husband whatsoever. Today I read the introduction entitled "A Note to the Reader," and the first chapter. In the introduction, Lori begins with several questions such as "Are you in a difficult marriage...?" "Does it seem like you're moving further away from your husband rather than toward him?" She tells us that these types of questions were important to her because of the difficulties she was having in her marriage as her children were leaving home. She briefly tells the story of taking a walk with Ken and hearing him say he felt there would be nothing holding them together when the children left. She tells us that all the conflict between Ken and her started on their honeymoon (although later she mentions that they argued a lot while they dated.) She became angry with Ken on their honeymoon because he ate Ritz crackers with Fake cheese spread and she "was appalled that he would eat something so junky since I was raised to be a health nut." With that sentence she is sure to let her readers know that anybody who does anything differently than she does is always wrong. I mean, if she won't eat crackers and cheese, then why would anybody else want to eat crackers and cheese? She tells us that she gave him the silent treatment for eating unhealthy foods. Quote: "I thought that if he really cared about my happiness, he wouldn't eat ice cream and deli meats." She also thought he watched too much television, was "consumed with sports" and was grumpy with her. She does admit to acting more like his mother than his wife. "Thank goodness we had children," she writes as she begins a paragraph in which she tells us that she was a great mother (reader's jaw drops here) but a neglectful wife. She tells us they even argued while they would go out for an evening without the children. She claims she was heartbroken from Ken's words about their marriage and that she was struck with grief at having no idea how to fix her marriage. This is where we are first introduced to Debi Pearl's book. Here she says the book "woke me up to what I was missing in my marriage." There is absolutely no mention of how Debi spanked her with her words (reader was sad to realize there was no mention of spanking.) Debi's book made her dreams come true. It transformed her marriage. It made her realize she must give up control. Lori then reminds us that Titus 2 holds all the answers. I will leave it at that for now and be back later to review Chapter One, "My Life Growing Up." The Chapters: 1. My Life Growing Up 2. Why I Mentor Women 3. Let it Go! (reader instantly begins singing 'Frozen' songs) 4. Allow Him to Lead 5. What Submission Looks Like 6. Easy Conflict Resolution (wait!! Conflict resolution is a sinful modern psychological tool - reader's brain bends) 7. This Thing Called Sex (reader scoops out own eyeballs with rusty spoon) 8. Winning Him Without a Word 9. Teaching and Training Children in the Way They Should Go 10. Birth Control and Having Children 11. The Dating Scene and Sexual Purity 12. Keepers at Home 13. How Are You Dressing? (reader instantly thinks of salad jokes) 14. Talking About Your Financial Health 15. The Disciplined Mind: Trusting God and Doing Good 16. Clutter No More 17. Serving Healthy Foods Means Healthy Families 18. A Way to a Man's Heart 19. The Power to Become a Transformed Wife. Side note: In having read just a small portion of the book, I was struck with how often she mentions food and how she relates it to love, morality and control. More later, dear FJ readers.
  10. Halloween Library Haul

    Hey everyone! It is officially almost Halloween, which is always a time of year that I love. So to get me into the spirit, I made a trip down to the library to pick up a few "spooky" books! Here they are! I got two comic books, one book of ghost stories, one audiobook, and one e-book. The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (Vol 1) takes the story of Sabrina the teenage witch and sets it in the 60's in Massachusetts. The coven she's apart of is fairly evil, and this story is nothing like the Melissa Joan Hart Sabrina. I am almost done with it, and I really enjoyed this and would recommend it! Next is Wytches Vol 1, which I haven't started yet and I actually don't really know the plot (lol sorry). Lastly is Roald Dahl's Book of Ghost Stories. This is a collection of ghost stories that he put together. He also wrote the introduction. Not pictured is the audiobook of The Witches by Roald Dahl, which I got through my library on Overdrive. This is a children's book about witches in England who desire to rid the Earth of all the smelly children. I used to LOVE Roald Dahl as a child, so since I was reading "spooky" books, I thought I'd give that a go. Also not pictured is Bird Box by Josh Malerman. I read this via e-book again through Overdrive. This is an adult horror novel, heavy on the suspense. The plot is somewhat post-apocalyptic, where the characters can't look outside or go outside with their eyes open, for fear of seeing this "thing" that makes people go crazy. The main character is trying to get to safety, which is obviously tricky, since she can't use her eyes. If I get the e-book off Overdrive in time, I might be able to fit in We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson, as well. Do you have any recommendations for "spooky" Halloween type books? I'd love to hear them!
  11. I went to the library today and here is what I got! Today is the start of Hispanic Heritage Month, so I mostly picked out some books by Latino/a authors. I actually wasn't planning ahead for this theme and didn't request any of them, so I just kinda found these by browsing the shelves. From top to bottom: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 (DVD) Esperanza Street by Niyati Keni Ways of Going Home by Alejandro Zambra (I think I will read this one first!) My Documents by Alejandro Zambra The Story of My Teeth by Valeria Luiselli The Miracle of Castel di Sangro by Joe McGinniss (my BF requested this one so I picked it up for him lol) What are you reading this month?
  12. Has anyone read the book Something Real by Heather Demetrios? I just finished it and loved it! It's about a girl who grows up on reality TV in a large family. I'd love to discuss it here!
  13. Game of Thrones Reread: Catelyn II

    Chapter 6: Catelyn II Catelyn and Ned enjoy some post-coital conversation/arguing. Maester Luwin shows up with a mysterious box with a message for Catelyn. Location: Catelyn’s bedchambers in Winterfell Characters Present: Catelyn Stark – wife of Eddard Stark. Eddard “Ned” Stark – Lord of Winterfell. Desmond – I have no idea who this guy is. A named guard, maybe? This is the second mention of him, no description or anything. Maester Luwin – small grey man. Grey eyes, grey hair, old, grey wool robe with lots of pockets. Characters mentioned but not present: Lysa – Cat’s sister Edmure – Cat’s brother Rickon – Cat’s youngest son. Robert – the king Sansa – Cat’s eldest daughter, 11 years of age. Joffrey – crown prince. Brandon – Ned’s brother, betrothed to Catelyn Tully at the time of his death. When he died, Ned married Cat out of obligation/custom. Arya – child of Catelyn and Ned. “needs refinement.” Robb – Oldest son of Cat & Ned. Will be expected to learn to rule Winterfell in Ned’s absence. Ser Rodrik - Told Ned that Joff and Robb don’t get along. I think he’s the Master of Arms, but it’s not mentioned in this chapter. Jon Snow - (thought to be the) Bastard of Eddard Snow and an unnamed woman. Possibly Ashara Dayne Ser Arthur Dayne – Sword of the Morning, deadliest of the seven knights of Aerys’s Kingsguard. Ashara Dayne – tall and fair with haunting violet eyes. Benjen Stark – A Sworn Brother of the Night’s Watch. Younger Brother of Ned. Other locations mentioned: Riverrun The Wall Mountains of Dorne Starfall – a castle on the shores of the Summer Sea. Myr – has great lens crafters. Recap: Catelyn and Ned have sex. After they finish, Ned decides to refuse Robert’s offer to be Hand and marry Sansa (11) to Joff (12, asshole). Catelyn tells him that kings are not like other men, and Ned cannot refuse him. Catelyn is upset at this choice and tries to change Ned’s mind. She points out that she (Cat) was only 12 when she was betrothed to Ned’s older brother Brandon. At the mention of Brandon, Ned becomes upset. Maester Luwin, who has a mysterious message for Catelyn, interrupts them. He says that a carved wooden box was left in his observatory while he napped. It contained a new lens for the observatory, and a message for Catelyn. The message, hidden beneath a false bottom, was sealed with blue was and the symbol of House Arryn. It’s a message from Lysa, written in a private language that Cat and Lysa made up as children, that says Jon Arryn was murdered by the queen. Catelyn immediately uses this to convince Ned to go south. Ned decides that Catelyn must stay in Winterfell. Catelyn this of this as a punishment. Ned decides to leave Robb and Rickon , and take Sansa, Bran, and Arya to Kings Landing. Cat is like “cool, except I really like Bran so can I keep him?” and Ned’s like “no, I need him to try and make friends with the Lannister/Baratheon royal children.” After the discussion about the true-born children, Maester Luwin brings up the fact that Jon Snow exists. Catelyn tells him that “He can not stay here.” That’s after a couple of paragraphs about how Jon is treated different, how the Starks are not like other men, and how she doesn’t know who the mother is, but she suspects it is Ashara Dayne. Catelyn has forgiven Ned for the bastard, as it was expected. She has not forgiven him for bringing Jon back to Winterfell and calling him son. They argue some more. Cat basically expels Jon from the castle. Maester Luwin cuts in and tells them both that Jon would like to join the Night’s Watch. Catelyn thinks about herself while Ned gazes out the window and finally agrees to send Jon off to the North with Benjen. Catelyn is happy that Jon will never have sons that might contest her grandchildren for Winterfell. Thoughts: I love the description of Winterfell. I would love to live in a castle, build over hot springs, where water heats the walls and glass gardens. The pools in a dozen small courtyards would be nice too. Just head out, hop in a hot spring for a bath or whatever. I love that combination of hot + cold. It might explain my choice to live where I do and vacation where I vacation. I could do without this: Not because it doesn’t pack a bunch of information about Cat’s character, her place in the world, and her main interests. It’s the word “loins.” And the description of “feeling his seen within her” along with my mental picture of dirty Sean Bean from the show. I had never noticed that Catelyn actually gets angry with Ned, and can’t figure out why he (Ned) can’t see what an honor it would be to be Hand, and to marry Sansa to the crown prince. She wants Sansa to be queen, she wants the honor. Catelyn also straight up tells Ned that Brandon is dead and that he (Ned) must take his (Brandon’s) role, like it or not. Does anyone bother to ask “how did this box with this message end up in the observatory with a new lens from Myr?” For all I know, Catelyn put it up there as to help her cause of making her daughter queen. “Catelyn’s heart went out to him, but she knew he could not take him into her arms just then. First the victory must be won, for her children’s sake.” Then there is this: Her first thought is about how it makes her feel. How it’s HER punishment. Not that she’s sending her husband to King’s Landing, where she just heard that the last Hand was murdered. Whatever, Cat, you uncompassionate idiotic character who has no thoughts other than duty and sons. Also, I guess Bran is her favorite. It didn’t take her long to “let go of” the girls “in her heart.” Seriously, like 10 seconds. Girls are not important in Westeros. Not even to their mother. After Catelyn decides that Ned is right about Bran and that she can’t argue with Ned, the subject of Jon Snow is brought up. Catelyn is really upset about it and says that Jon must go. Even though Jon and Robb are close. She is still upset that Ned brought Jon back to Winterfell and called him “son.” Ned is “anguished” at her response. I dislike Cat more in this chapter than I ever have before. I know all the stuff about the context of the time they were living in, but I still don’t like her. She has the opportunity to change the way she looks at things. In the North, things are different. She could allow Jon to stay for Ned’s sake or Robb’s sake. If she were about “duty, honor, family” she would be more submissive to Ned. Maybe she needs some lessons from Lori Alexander. I wonder why Benjen decided to join the Night’s Watch. Was it just that he was younger and not heir to Winterfell? Did he feel the need to punish himself for something? In the last Cat chapter, we read that she found Ned “At the center of the grove and ancient weirwood brooded over a small pool where the waters were black and cold.” According to this chapter, the waters around Winterfell are all hot springs. I don’t think it’s a mistake. I know, from living in the north, that there can be cold lakes and hot springs. Just something I noticed about Winterfell’s godswood. R+L=J Thoughts IIRC, Ned buried Ser Arthur at the TOJ. They (or maybe just Ned?) tore down the tower to create cairns because the soil was so bad. Yet somehow, Lyanna’s remains ended up in Winterfell. The remains of Ned’s men, however, were buried at the TOJ, and Ned brought that sword back to Starfall. None of this makes any sense to me. If they could bring Lyanna back, why not his men? How far is Starfall from the TOJ? How did he tear down that tower with only his hands and Howland Reed? These questions need answering. Stupid, stupid Joffrey “Baratheon.” What if he stormed up the Tower, held Lyanna’s hand while she died, picked up the baby who was starving, went to Starfall, where Ashara helped conspire with him, giving him Wylla to use as a wet-nurse. Meanwhile, Eddard and Ashara have an affair. Or maybe they don’t have an affair. Eddard sends a wetnurse and the baby north with Lyanna’s body and Howland Reed. Eddard goes back to deal with the carnage at the Tower. Maybe he puts everyone in a mass grave because the animals have made a mess of things, and then heads to the trident to meet Robert? In regards to Jon, Ned says: Catelyn thinks that Ned must have loved whomever Jon’s father is "fiercely." If it was Lyanna, then yes, Ned would love her fiercely. And based on her thoughts in this chapter about Sansa being queen and Jon’s grandchildren contesting her grandchildren for Winterfell, there is NO WAY Ned would ever trust Catelyn with this.
  14. Summer Solstice has come and gone. While this isn't exactly the end of summer, it's definitely a turning point. Day length has peaked with 19 hours, 21 minutes, and 32 seconds of daylight. I'm not quite ready to turn in my flip-flops, tank-tops, and other assorted hyphenated signs-of-summer yet. I am, however, ready for some deep sleep. With that, here are some random thoughts from this week. One of the "benefits" of 19+ hours of daylight is that not everyone realizes that it's actually 11 p.m. and therefore it's a great time to mow your lawn. Neighbors be damned! I realize now why my yoga membership was 50% off. Who wants to be inside right now? Has anyone read this book? White Trash: The 400-Year Untold History of Class in America. I want to read it but I don't want to spend $14.99 for a Kindle book. I wish American states were allowed to peacefully vote themselves out of the Union. Not that I think my state would be able to stand alone, but we have different issues and a different economy than, say, Washington D.C. Why is pho so delicious when someone else makes it? I use the same ingredients and it's NOT the same. I'm going to guess that Burger King's target demographic is "teenage stoners" as their latest offering has somehow managed to be even more disgusting that that Taco Bell monstrosity. clipping. released a new song and I'm kind of disappointed. CLPPNG was one of my favorite albums of 2014. I recently set a PW (personal worst) at a recent triathlon. I can't say I'm surprised, I've not been eating correctly or training properly. I'm disappointed, though. I'm glad I will be backpacking all weekend. It will keep me from wandering about my house, looking for Game of Thrones spoilers. I'm disappointed I'll be missing my weekly long run with friends. I need to remember that l'habit ne fait pas le moine, as I've found myself a bit judgemental of both myself and others recently. Speaking of french proverbs, I suppose petit a petit, l'oiseau fait son nid, also fits. Speaking of birds, has anyone else read this article about the creator of Oiselle? I am so annoyed by giant corporations and especially Nike. I do not like Nike products and never have. Wait, that's not true. I have a pair of dry-fit socks which were the most bestest socks ever for the first three times I wore them.
  15. Hey, it's free on Kindle Unlimited so I thought why not? It's a wonder I made it to the 2nd chapter.
  16. Chapter 15: The Chocolate Room Mr Wonka opens the door to The Chocolate room with keys. Like actual keys. I guess the part where Mr Wonka plays a keyboard to enter is movie only. I tried to find it but the only video on youtube ends with a rude sound as a "joke." Also did you know that Mrs TeaVee is wrong when she smugly states " Rachmaninoff" as the composer? The kids and grownups push their way into the room and they look "upon a lovely valley" with a brown river. The chocolate room is described in great detail, but we've all seen the movies so I don't need to recap that. The important part is that there is a waterfall, which Mr Wonka claims is the ONLY way to mix chocolate properly. Everything in the room, from the grass to the bushes, is edible and pretty. Let me take a moment to point out that I actually live in a town that has a chocolate waterfall. And I've been meaning to go take a photo of it for ages for this blog. I even drove past it last night. Twice, once in car, and once on a bike. Well, twice on the bike. No matter. I found a picture online. It's gross. Seriously. I can not even begin to describe the disgust I feel when I look at this monstrosity in person. It's supposedly "The worlds largest chocolate waterfall." It claims 3,000 pounds of chocolate. It has copper kettles and a sign that reminds you not to taste it. Probably because it's disgusting. Back to the book. The kids all sample a blade of grass, except Augustus who takes a handful. I can not wait for this kid to get sucked up into the tunnel. He's just so one dimensional. Grandpa Joe mentions that he wants to get on all fours and go around eating like a cow. I don't even know what to say to that. Veruca flips out when she sees "a little person" (Spoiler, it's an Oompa Loompa.) There are bunch of them and the drawing in my nice modern version is completely unoffensive. Unlike the image I just uploaded. The Oompa Loompas point and laugh at the children. Charlie says "They can't be real people" and Mr. Wonka introduces them as Oompa Loompas. Chapter 16: The Oompa-Loompas Everyone repeats the phrasing "Oompa-Loompas!" Twice. Mrs. Salt (not Mrs TeaVee) claims there is no such place and she would know because she teaches Geography. Mr. Wonka goes on a bit about what a terrible country it is, with hornswogglers and snozzwangers and whangdoodles. Whangdoodles eat Oompa-Loomps! And the Oompa-Loompas were living on green caterpillars and those tasted awful. What Oompa-Loompas REALLY want is the cacao bean. (Guess what chocolate is made from.) So Mr Wonka goes to the 'tree-house' village that the Oompa-Loompas are living in and "pokes his head" into the door of the leader's house. Mr. Wonka offers the tribe unlimited cacao beans and chocolate. He SMUGGLES THEM into his country by packing them into large packing cases with holes in them. I remember this ending differently on The Wire. Anyway, so Mr. Wonka smuggles some people into his factory/country and all is well because they now are paid with chocolate, they learned english, and they love dancing and music. Also the people wear the same clothes as in the jungle (so the movie is not accurate in the least). The women wear leaves, the children are naked, and the men wear deerskins. (If they had deer in the jungle, then why are the surviving on caterpillar paste?) Veruca interrupts Mr. Wonka by screaming about how SHE wants and Oompa-Loompa RIGHT NOW. Don't worry, Veruca. I'm sure your dad is considering finding more of them for a cheap labor source at the peanut factory. Or whatever it is he does. Mr Salt finally promises Veruca a person. He is going to give his spoiled daughter a person. Jesus, take the wheel. This is dark. When I'm done with this, I think I'll read Peter Pan and continue ruining my childhood. (In a completely weird coincidence, I put "50 Great Musical Numbers" on my phone and "Everybody ought to have a Maid" from "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" just came on. Ugh.) Augustus is being shouted at by his mom. He's about to fall into the chocolate river.
  17. Columbine shooter's mom releases a tell all book .It seems the public mostly blamed her. The kid had two parents. http://www.houstonchronicle.com/life/books/article/Sue-Klebold-s-memoir-about-her-teenage-son-6843155.php
  18. Enjoyed any non-fiction recently that hasn't put you to sleep? Add your favorite NON-fiction books here. Feel free to add a non-spoiler review. Some lists that already exist: http://www.modernlibrary.com/top-100/100-best-nonfiction/ http://www.theguardian.com/books/2011/jun/14/100-greatest-non-fiction-books http://thegreatestbooks.org/nonfiction http://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2015/07/the-15-best-nonfiction-books-of-2015-so-far.html (Thanks Kailash)
  19. I am always looking to spruce up my TBR list, and my goodreads/tumblr feeds, so I enjoy reading and following book blogs. However, I have trouble finding book blogs that aren't geared towards YA. I mean, it makes sense, because bloggers are most likely younger people, and young people love YA. I am not knocking YA or anything, but it gets tiresome when post after post features similar YA-fantasy type books. So I am turning to FJ! Anyone know of a book blogger they love?
  20. Thank you to everyone for not wondering where I went for two weeks. I'll be continuing my reread of the beloved children's classic "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" on my normal schedule of "whenever I feel like it" from now until I finish or get bored. JUST KIDDING! I went on vacation. It was lovely. Chapter 14: Mr. Willy Wonka We, the readers, finally meet the much described Mr. Wonka. He's wearing a tail coat made of plum-colored velvet, bottle green trousers, grey gloves, and carries a gold-topped walking cane. He has "bright eyes" and goatee. He is described as full of fun and laughter. He is also described as "like a clever old squirrel from the park." Not quite right. Nor this. Better, but I don't know what it is from. Is there a stage play I don't know about? Mr Wonka, with a "high and flutey" voice, invites the children and parents to come forward. He shakes their hands and checks their tickets. When he gets to Charlie, he does the same, pointing out that Charlie found his ticket just yesterday. Entering the factory, Mr Wonka points out that it is warm because of "the workers" who are used to an "extremely hot climate." The group is led into what appears to be maze that slopes downward. They go this way and that way, and the air is described and it's all very lovely. Finally they arrive at what is labeled "The Chocolate Room."
  21. Recent Book Haul ft. Murphy the Cat

    Even though I am definitely in no shortage of unread books, I thought it would be a good idea to go to Goodwill today. Unsurprisingly, I walked out of there with quite a few books! Here to help me model them today is Murphy, the most handsome book model there could ever be. I got these for such a steal, it was too hard to pass up! In case you can't read the titles from the picture, I got: Collected Stories by Gabriel Garcia Marquez The Angel's Game by Carlos Ruiz Zafon (the second book in his Cemetery of Forgotten Books series) Looking for Alaska by John Green Animal Dreams by Barbara Kingsolver Little Bee by Chris Cleave The Lost Daughter by Elena Ferrante All the Birds in the Sky by Charlie Jane Anders Let me know if any of you have ever read some of these books! I am excited to dive into them, although goodness knows when I will ever get all the books on my shelf read.
  22. Chapter 13: The Big Day Arrives There is a crowd of people in front of Wonka's chocolate factory on February 1. The five ticket holders and their adults are shielded by the police. Everyone who isn't Charlie has both of their parents with them. Charlie has Grandpa Joe, the lazy old man who isn't at all interested in helping out his family until free chocolate is put on the table. The other children are being children and trying to climb over the gates. Charlie hears people in the crowd discussing the children. It's not nice. Augustus is fat, Veruca is spoiled, Charlie is poor and starving and somehow that is a personality flaw, Violet is gross with her three month old gum. And then.
  23. Chapter 12: What It Said on the Golden Ticket Charlie (which I pronounce in my head as Chaaaaalie, which I think is a TWOP Lost reference that I should stop doing) bursts into the cat's grandparent's room. They are eating their evening soup. Charlie shouts about finding the Golden Ticket, and finding money in the street. Everyone is silent. They think it's a joke. Charlie shows them the Golden Ticket. Grandpa Joe, who is not illiterate, holds the ticket up to his face, so close it's almost touching his nose. The other grandparents wait. Grandpa Joe is excited. So excited that he jumps out of bed for the first time in 20 years. Grandpa Joe is 96. My grandpa is 96. My grandpa, sad that my grandmother died a few years ago, found himself a new girlfriend. At 96. He still drives (though he shouldn't.) He still works around the house. Grandpa Joe is content to let people wait on him for 20 years. TWENTY YEARS. That means he took to his bed at 76, when he should have still been able to hold a job. He let his son's wife take care of bedpans and feeding him daily for 20 years. And the second he gets something interesting in his life, he's up. He's so excited about the prospect of going to the factory that he knocks a bowl of soup into his wife's face. Charlie's father comes home and they have to explain the excitement. Mr. Bucket sits down and has Charlie bring him the ticket. The Golden Ticket is described as being a sheet of gold hammered to ALMOST the thinness of paper. The invitation is read to the family by Mr. Bucket. The invitation invites the winner to come to the factory and be the guest of Mr Willy Wonka for a whole day. When it is time to leave, the winners will be escorted home by a procession of large trucks which contain "supplies" to feed the winner and his/her household for many years. When they are gone, the winner can go back to the factory, show the ticket, and get more. There are more undescribed surprises in store for the winners. The first of February is when the winners must present themselves and the ticket. They can bring one or two members of their own family. Turns out that Charlie found the ticket on the last day of January. Good thing he lives in the same city as the Wonka Factory! Grandpa Joe decides HE will be the one to take Charlie. Mr Bucket wants to go, but he feels that his father is the one who "deserves to go" ... Whatever. This family is dysfunctional as hell. Mrs Bucket then says that Grandpa Joe should go because she can't go and leave the "other three old people all alone in bed for a whole day." She actually says that. In front of them. And then the paparazzi show up.
  24. Read a horror book: Read a nonfiction book about science: Read a collection of essays: Read a book out loud to someone else: Read a middle grade novel: Read a biography (not a memoir or autobiography): Read a dystopian or post-apocalyptic novel: Read a book originally published in the decade you were bron: Listen to an audiobook that has won an Audie Award: Read a book over 500 pages long: Read a book under 100 pages long: Read a book by or about a person that identifies as transgender: Read a book that is set in the Middle East: Read a book that is by an author from Southeast Asia: Read a book of historical fiction set before 1900: Read the first book in a series by a person of color: Read a non-superhero comic that debuted in the last three years: Read a book that was adapted into a movie then watch the movie & debate which is better: Read a nonfiction book about feminism or dealing with feminist themes: Read a book about religion (fiction or nonfiction): Read a book about politics, in your country or another (fiction or nonfiction): Read a food memoir: Read a play: Read a book with a main charter that has mental illness:
  25. Chapter 11: The Miracle Charlie goes to the candy store and buys a Wonka Whipple-Scrumptious Fudgemallow Delight. Maggie Mae tears open a Russell Stover Mini Egg, with Fudge Brownie filling. I think it's pretty similar. 50% off! I put the rest of the bag in the jar with the old Halloween candy, the christmas/Hanukkah candy, and the Valentine's day candy. There is probably candy in there from two Halloweens ago. I know there are New Years Eve Noisemakers from three years ago, also in the same jar. I know this because one was used last night. Oh, so in the book, Charlie buys this candy bar from a "fat and well-fed" man. He is described in great detail about how he is fat and his neck bulges out over his shirt collar. This shopkeeper watches as Charlie shoves the candy bar into Charlie's mouth like he was starving. I guess Charlie is starving, though, so it's OK. The man tells Charlie to slow down and make sure to chew, to avoid the "gut-ache." Charlie decides to buy a second candy bar and bring 80 cents back to his mother. One dollar in 1964 is equivalent to 7.65 today, so I guess it might buy a meal. I've lived in a high cost-of-living area for so long that I don't actually know what 7.65 would buy at a grocery store. Maybe ingredients for a stir-fry? For 4. Or a LOT of almost expiring bananas. The second candy bar - same type as the last - has a Golden Ticket! We all knew he would get one, and now it's happened! The shopkeeper does not assault Charlie and steal it, he does however, draw more attention that I would be comfortable with to the situation. Did you know the shopkeeper was fat? If you had forgotten, it's helpfully pointed out again. A "large boy" is angry because he's been eating 20 chocolate bars a day trying to win this ticket. A girl laughs and says that Charlie will need the free chocolate, as he is a "skinny little shrimp." (What is up with people and making fun of fat and skinny people? Why can't we just not do that?) People offer to buy the Golden Ticket from Charlie. Finally the "fat shopkeeper" helps him out of the store, tells him to run home, and don't let anyone have it. The "fat shopkeeper" mentions that he thinks Charlie needs a break like this. So the "fat shopkeeper" isn't a villain, really, although the other adults are. So maybe it's not really fat shaming? It still seemed jarring to read about this man's weight so many times in such a short chapter. The other adults, though, are terrible. $50 and a bicycle? How awful to try and cheat a kid like that! Even $500 is still not even close to what the ticket is worth! How much do you think Veruca's dad spent on chocolate to try and get one ticket? I'm kind of surprised that no one else sold a ticket. If I had gotten one, I'd sell it for sure! A lifetime supply of candy, plus an exclusive look inside the chocolate factory is worth a lot more than $500. If I didn't sell it, I'd for sure bring a secret spy pen camera and take pictures and sell those. Or write a book about what I saw and sell that. And the candy. I don't think I eat that much candy, so I'd be donating that to soup kitchens or something. Or maybe just leave it at the end of a race, when people will eat just about anything.