Summary provided by: salsa
Mrs. Anna T â€“ â€œDomestic Felicityâ€
Anna writes for Ladies Against Feminism, though Iâ€™ve only rarely checked that site. I stumbled across her blog in pretty much the usual way anyone stumbles across any blog. I was interested, however, because sheâ€™s Jewish Orthodox and living in Israel. I thought the perspective of a woman in Israel would be interesting and it is.
Anna writes well and is multilingual and college educated, with a degree in nutrition. She was raised by a single mother and they were not very devout in their religious practice. In college she dated a man and it sounds like it was a pretty serious relationship, but he was abusive to her. Afterward, she began to turn to her religion and found comfort in it and the traditional gender roles Orthodoxy offered. She remained single for a year or two after college before she met her husband, Yitzhak.
Their first date sounds like it was all business and they measured their interests and values against the otherâ€™s interests and values and they decided they were compatible. From there, it wasnâ€™t long before they were engaged, married, and had a baby girl. After 18 months, another baby girl came along. They have moved quite a bit in their short time together. Some have opined that she lives in an Israeli settlement, but she indicates only that theyâ€™re in the country and that they are in a peaceful area.
One thing about Annaâ€™s blog that stands out is her constant quest for peace. That may partially be due to her knowing that military conflict is near, but it also seems to be some kind of internal craving with her. She doesnâ€™t seem to deal well with much of any kind of pressure. Even having people over for Shabbat, where itâ€™s pot-luck style, seems stressful even though she enjoys the company. Still, the reader gets the impression of a rather introverted woman who likes things to flow smoothly.
Another thing that stands out is her rigidity. She believes women are suited and designed for domestic endeavors and men are to be the providers and leaders. Period. For a woman to have a hobby is to be neglectful of her family. When challenged, she just repeats her beliefs. There doesnâ€™t seem to be any room for â€œdifferent strokes for different folks.â€ (a snark-worthy read is interesting read is the blog of Analytical Adam, a guy who occasionally comments on her more theological posts)
That said, she speaks strongly against a conservative wing of Orthodox Jews where the men study Torah all the time and the women work, have numerous children, and keep the house.
Not long ago, she wrote a post about how, when she was newly married, sheâ€™d hoped to be a mom to many children, but that it was not to be. She didnâ€™t elaborate on why. She desires to homeschool, but expresses nervousness about whether the government will allow it. It seems there are enough hoops to jump through in Israel that it makes homeschooling difficult.
Her family of origin doesnâ€™t seem to be very supportive, but she doesnâ€™t elaborate. She also was disappointed in her hospital birthing experiences, finding them overly clinical, unnecessarily invasive, and brusque (my words, not hers).
I like hearing about their holidays. Because they are Orthodox, they observe them all and thereâ€™s a part of me that finds quite nice that cycle of remembering and celebrating or mourning or whatever. And she makes some delicious-looking meals (oh, she used to be vegetarian but now incorporates some meat in her diet).
My favorite post of hers is the one where she reflects on her reflection in the mirror and what it means and how itâ€™s not always comfortable. Even after being married 5 years, sheâ€™s not yet comfortable seeing herself in a tichel. There had been a picture of her in her headscarf on her blog and I liked that photo. She has a nice smile. I liked learning that someone with such rigid beliefs also has some internal conflict rather than pretending all is always perfect.
There for awhile, she wrote a little story, in segments on her blog, about a girl named Becky who has to go live with her aunt and uncleâ€™s family. Of course, Becky was not religious and wore short skirts and jeans and her aunt and uncleâ€™s family is Orthodox and she has some adjusting to do. Anna hasnâ€™t updated the story in a long time. Though Anna writes well, the story was corny and predictable.
I choose to read her blog as a look into the life of a woman whoâ€™s trying to make sense of life and, like most fundies who choose rigidity, find comfort in shelter offered by religion and prescribed roles.
Provided by salsa
Mrs. Anna T continues to search for peacefulness. She really does seem to enjoy what she calls â€œthe simple life at home,â€ baking, crafting, gardening, and chicken-keeping, but things donâ€™t seem to be all that stable.
For starters, she and her family move relatively frequently. She does not elaborate why they move, but she does hint that her husbandâ€™s employment is not altogether reliable.
The â€œcrossroads in (her husbandâ€™s) careerâ€ (as she put it) might indicate that their income is not steady. Given her devout faith, she interprets un-steady income as a means upon which to rely on God and trust in his provisions.
While she had hoped to have a lot of children, she has two daughters. She did not elaborate on why they stopped at two, but a recent post (by another woman) about secondary infertility might be a clue. I donâ€™t know whether she has simply not conceived due to secondary infertility (the author of the piece she shared had that experience) or whether she and Mr. T chose to stop after two for other reasons. In any case, it seems that folks in her community are as meddlesome as they are anywhere else and they question her child spacing â€“ that her youngest is 3 or 4 and thereâ€™s no sign of one on the way. That she shared another womanâ€™s story of being hurt by othersâ€™ meddlesome comments and questions as to why there were no more children when the woman is still of childbearing age makes me wonder if she also feels hurt.
It seems she lives in a â€œsettledâ€ area of Israel and she is currently very worried that this land will get taken away from them (the Jewish people). Being a more â€œmainstreamâ€ Orthodox Jew, it would follow that she believes that God gave the Jewish people Israel and that they are to occupy it. She has said nothing about the Israeli Armyâ€™s bulldozing tactics, so I donâ€™t know whether or not she agrees with their form of border â€œenforcement.â€
Please forgive the more personal opinions in the following paragraph: In the US, when we wish for a peaceful life, we usually mean a life thatâ€™s unhindered by stresses like long commutes, work deadlines, and trying to stay afloat financially. Living where she does, I do believe â€œpeaceâ€ has a more literal connotation, so I really canâ€™t join others in concluding that sheâ€™s somehow avoiding real life. I canâ€™t fault her for wanting peace and stability. However, if she ever comes out with an attempt to justify the Israeli Armyâ€™s actions, my generally positive impression of her will do a 180. She has never come out with anti-Muslim comments, but if they live in an occupied settlement (this is information I gathered via fj; Anna has never shared their whereabouts other than their living in the country), I wonder how neighborly they really feel towards them - and I do recognize that the Israel/Palestine antagonism goes both ways.
The family will be moving again soon (she has not shared where theyâ€™ll be going) and it sounds like theyâ€™re downsizing. I really hope that Mr. T can find stable, profitable employment, as she has put herself in a place where she is dependent upon him, financially. Of course, she sees this as living the way God intended and tries to put on a happy face, but thereâ€™s something about her tone that sounds disappointed. She wants the Orthodox Jewish Woman Dream and itâ€™s not turning out too dreamy.
I like her love of animals and nature, playing with her children, doing crafts (some very pretty crochet work) and intelligence.
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I've been doing a deep dive in Carlin's IG because I'm bored at work and she is clearly smitten to the point of being obsessed with him. It makes me barfy when non-fundie couples say "you complete me" but when 19 year old fundies say it makes me want to go full Exorcist. You need to be a whole person on your own!0
5 hours ago, Justmurrayed said:
What is Christopher going to do when he has 12 kids? Surely crappy photography can't pay THAT much that he'll be able to feed and clothe and homeschool his kids. Something's going to give, but will we hear about it is the question? Of course not, but a lady can dream.
Yeah, buying a house debt-free can only take you so far when you get to the point where your grocery bill exceeds a normal person's mortgage payment. I suppose they have enough room in the backyard to grow some of their own food. They could also keep chickens like Nathan's kids do. But still, that's not enough to feed a dozen kids every day.0
I'm down the for the FJ retreat! I also knit, can anything, quilt, and my cats have taught me a few tricks.
I have a couple of ideas for other activities. How about FJ Jeopardy? Your answer must be in the form of a question and categories could be things like Maxwell Hell, The Joshies, Swine Before Pearls, Babe & Baaabe, etc. Also I bet the musicians and vocalists among us (not me) could perform an awesome version of that "Through the Blood" song that the Duggars use to sing endlessly. We could then post it on YouTube to encourage others!0
Yes, the reason they couldn't see the doctor for a year was because that's the usual way of things for young couples trying to conceive...my husband and I thought we might have issues because of his disability and we were told to try for a year before even coming in for testing, even with his spinal cord injury. (We ended up getting pregnant the first month, though--just goes to show you never know with fertility). The problem could be him or her or both. I took his comment about God just saying "no for now" to be him just trying to be optimistic in a difficult situation, he never hinted he was against seeing a doctor.
I can't see any reason why IUI or IVF would be out of the picture for them from a religious standpoint?0
Could it have been a spider bite? I wonder what they're checking for. Hope that sweet baby isn't in pain and recovers quickly.0