Summary provided by: salsa
Mrs. Anna T â€“ â€œDomestic Felicityâ€
Anna writes for Ladies Against Feminism, though Iâ€™ve only rarely checked that site. I stumbled across her blog in pretty much the usual way anyone stumbles across any blog. I was interested, however, because sheâ€™s Jewish Orthodox and living in Israel. I thought the perspective of a woman in Israel would be interesting and it is.
Anna writes well and is multilingual and college educated, with a degree in nutrition. She was raised by a single mother and they were not very devout in their religious practice. In college she dated a man and it sounds like it was a pretty serious relationship, but he was abusive to her. Afterward, she began to turn to her religion and found comfort in it and the traditional gender roles Orthodoxy offered. She remained single for a year or two after college before she met her husband, Yitzhak.
Their first date sounds like it was all business and they measured their interests and values against the otherâ€™s interests and values and they decided they were compatible. From there, it wasnâ€™t long before they were engaged, married, and had a baby girl. After 18 months, another baby girl came along. They have moved quite a bit in their short time together. Some have opined that she lives in an Israeli settlement, but she indicates only that theyâ€™re in the country and that they are in a peaceful area.
One thing about Annaâ€™s blog that stands out is her constant quest for peace. That may partially be due to her knowing that military conflict is near, but it also seems to be some kind of internal craving with her. She doesnâ€™t seem to deal well with much of any kind of pressure. Even having people over for Shabbat, where itâ€™s pot-luck style, seems stressful even though she enjoys the company. Still, the reader gets the impression of a rather introverted woman who likes things to flow smoothly.
Another thing that stands out is her rigidity. She believes women are suited and designed for domestic endeavors and men are to be the providers and leaders. Period. For a woman to have a hobby is to be neglectful of her family. When challenged, she just repeats her beliefs. There doesnâ€™t seem to be any room for â€œdifferent strokes for different folks.â€ (a snark-worthy read is interesting read is the blog of Analytical Adam, a guy who occasionally comments on her more theological posts)
That said, she speaks strongly against a conservative wing of Orthodox Jews where the men study Torah all the time and the women work, have numerous children, and keep the house.
Not long ago, she wrote a post about how, when she was newly married, sheâ€™d hoped to be a mom to many children, but that it was not to be. She didnâ€™t elaborate on why. She desires to homeschool, but expresses nervousness about whether the government will allow it. It seems there are enough hoops to jump through in Israel that it makes homeschooling difficult.
Her family of origin doesnâ€™t seem to be very supportive, but she doesnâ€™t elaborate. She also was disappointed in her hospital birthing experiences, finding them overly clinical, unnecessarily invasive, and brusque (my words, not hers).
I like hearing about their holidays. Because they are Orthodox, they observe them all and thereâ€™s a part of me that finds quite nice that cycle of remembering and celebrating or mourning or whatever. And she makes some delicious-looking meals (oh, she used to be vegetarian but now incorporates some meat in her diet).
My favorite post of hers is the one where she reflects on her reflection in the mirror and what it means and how itâ€™s not always comfortable. Even after being married 5 years, sheâ€™s not yet comfortable seeing herself in a tichel. There had been a picture of her in her headscarf on her blog and I liked that photo. She has a nice smile. I liked learning that someone with such rigid beliefs also has some internal conflict rather than pretending all is always perfect.
There for awhile, she wrote a little story, in segments on her blog, about a girl named Becky who has to go live with her aunt and uncleâ€™s family. Of course, Becky was not religious and wore short skirts and jeans and her aunt and uncleâ€™s family is Orthodox and she has some adjusting to do. Anna hasnâ€™t updated the story in a long time. Though Anna writes well, the story was corny and predictable.
I choose to read her blog as a look into the life of a woman whoâ€™s trying to make sense of life and, like most fundies who choose rigidity, find comfort in shelter offered by religion and prescribed roles.
Provided by salsa
Mrs. Anna T continues to search for peacefulness. She really does seem to enjoy what she calls â€œthe simple life at home,â€ baking, crafting, gardening, and chicken-keeping, but things donâ€™t seem to be all that stable.
For starters, she and her family move relatively frequently. She does not elaborate why they move, but she does hint that her husbandâ€™s employment is not altogether reliable.
The â€œcrossroads in (her husbandâ€™s) careerâ€ (as she put it) might indicate that their income is not steady. Given her devout faith, she interprets un-steady income as a means upon which to rely on God and trust in his provisions.
While she had hoped to have a lot of children, she has two daughters. She did not elaborate on why they stopped at two, but a recent post (by another woman) about secondary infertility might be a clue. I donâ€™t know whether she has simply not conceived due to secondary infertility (the author of the piece she shared had that experience) or whether she and Mr. T chose to stop after two for other reasons. In any case, it seems that folks in her community are as meddlesome as they are anywhere else and they question her child spacing â€“ that her youngest is 3 or 4 and thereâ€™s no sign of one on the way. That she shared another womanâ€™s story of being hurt by othersâ€™ meddlesome comments and questions as to why there were no more children when the woman is still of childbearing age makes me wonder if she also feels hurt.
It seems she lives in a â€œsettledâ€ area of Israel and she is currently very worried that this land will get taken away from them (the Jewish people). Being a more â€œmainstreamâ€ Orthodox Jew, it would follow that she believes that God gave the Jewish people Israel and that they are to occupy it. She has said nothing about the Israeli Armyâ€™s bulldozing tactics, so I donâ€™t know whether or not she agrees with their form of border â€œenforcement.â€
Please forgive the more personal opinions in the following paragraph: In the US, when we wish for a peaceful life, we usually mean a life thatâ€™s unhindered by stresses like long commutes, work deadlines, and trying to stay afloat financially. Living where she does, I do believe â€œpeaceâ€ has a more literal connotation, so I really canâ€™t join others in concluding that sheâ€™s somehow avoiding real life. I canâ€™t fault her for wanting peace and stability. However, if she ever comes out with an attempt to justify the Israeli Armyâ€™s actions, my generally positive impression of her will do a 180. She has never come out with anti-Muslim comments, but if they live in an occupied settlement (this is information I gathered via fj; Anna has never shared their whereabouts other than their living in the country), I wonder how neighborly they really feel towards them - and I do recognize that the Israel/Palestine antagonism goes both ways.
The family will be moving again soon (she has not shared where theyâ€™ll be going) and it sounds like theyâ€™re downsizing. I really hope that Mr. T can find stable, profitable employment, as she has put herself in a place where she is dependent upon him, financially. Of course, she sees this as living the way God intended and tries to put on a happy face, but thereâ€™s something about her tone that sounds disappointed. She wants the Orthodox Jewish Woman Dream and itâ€™s not turning out too dreamy.
I like her love of animals and nature, playing with her children, doing crafts (some very pretty crochet work) and intelligence.
7 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:
Someone needs to tell Jessa to buy a bed skirt or as some call them a dust ruffle then you don't have to worry about the dust bunnies. I was raised by a militant neat freak, it was awful, having a mother who cared more about a clean house than her kids so when I see a less than spotless house I think, a homeowner who has more important things to do. Honestly why the hell does anyone care if Jessa has dust bunnies under her bed, or if Jill has laundry basket on her bedroom floor, of all the awful shit this family does, not living in a spotless house isn't even in the top 10.
I agree, a mother spending all her time on the house is not ideal for the kids. However, Ben is a professional toilet cleaner. (Just ask JB. Lol). Maybe he should be cleaning the house.0
4 hours ago, Smash! said:
You had that as well? That's so cool! My parents got it when my sister and I were pretty young children and read it with us.
I had it too. Must have read it a dozen times! In German, it's called "Peter, Ida und Minimum."1
6 hours ago, justmy2cents said:
I don't remember them discussing any protocol but Jeremy did say that he asked JB if he could get to know Jinger in early Dec. 2015. I just can't imagine a guy asking my dad if he could talk to me.
I can imagine my reaction if a guy asked my dad for permission to talk to me. If he did not have the guts to talk to me directly i would not have talked to him. If he thought i would talk to him just because my dad likes him, without thinking about my opinion, i would not have talked to him. I appreciate my dad's opinion, but he never would have liked to be my door to the world.
I can imagine my dad's reaction to such sort of guy. A guy who asked my dad for permission to get to know me would never ever have got his permission. Because my dad considers bis daughter as an independant woman with her own mind.Edited by Scrabblemaster
I really love my dad for being just as he is0
7 hours ago, PennySycamore said:
@MamaJunebug, I remember those old belts and pads you had to hitch up! They were so uncomfortable. I remember getting my period (not for the first time though) at the Beta Club state convention in Columbia. I had to go to the drug store and by that time they'd come out with Stayfree. I was eternally grateful to not have to deal with a belt.
When we girls or my mom had our periods, the dogs liked to knock over the kitchen or bathroom trash and snack on bloody Kotex. My sister and I had many days when we'd have to clean up in front of the door before my brothers came inside. Good times, I tell you!
What do you mean a belt? I'm confused.0
8 hours ago, catlady said:
yep, she's 50; only 3 years removed from the baby boomers.
That would be me. I'm at the tail end of the boomers. Does she go and try to hang with the millennials and expect to be accepted? She must make them really uncomfortable. They see her coming and say,.." Oh we gotta split, that creepy old lady is here". They probably wouldn't say "split"1