• Sky
  • Blueberry
  • Slate
  • Blackcurrant
  • Watermelon
  • Strawberry
  • Orange
  • Banana
  • Apple
  • Emerald
  • Chocolate
  • Charcoal
  • Dreaded Topics of Doom

    Below you will find a list of topics (not inclusive) which are likely to turn controversial quickly.  These topics are NOT forbidden, but you will likely get very strong responses if you bring them up.

    We have provided links to some of our past threads on these topics so you can understand what you are getting into if you decide to start a discussion on any of these topics.

    If you decide to brave any of these topics, please start the threads in the No Holds Barred forum.


     

    Vaccinations.

    Spanking.

    Adoption done wrong.

    Homeschooling and Unschooling.

    Circumcision.

    Breastfeeding.

    Peanut Butter.

    Car seats

     

    Artemis said:
    These threads became controversial because people stopped being 'people' and started being 'entrenched positions'

    The posts stopped being expressions of opinion or reasoned arguments, and started being personal attacks.

     

    They're all things that people have very strong views about - perhaps stronger than other issues - and they're all issues where doing/not doing the subject under discussion relates directly to your self-esteem or self-image, particularly as a parent. This means they are hot-button topics for some, and actually triggering for others, especially if the others have e.g. a child with a deathly peanut butter allergy, or have suffered Pearl-type abuse.

     

    They are also issues where the spectrum of opinion is strongly polarised towards both ends, and people who hold the opinions at both extreme ends tend to sit in them like boltholes in some deathly trench warfare.

     

    The sad thing about this is that nobody gains anything; the thread degenerates into an unseemly squabble; two people who might have had a useful discussion are now at loggerheads, and no-one is going to move from their entrenched position, ever.

     

    So:

     

    If you, like lots of us, are the sort of person who holds strong views about an issue, then if someone disagrees with you, counter your opponent with logic and reason, not with personal attacks (or, for that matter, on this forum, appeals to the unproven word of a Deity as a definitive, binding and unanswerable clincher to an argument).

     

    If someone counters your expression of your opinion with a personal attack, hold your ground, back up your opinion with reason and logic, and make it clear to them that personal attacks are not strategically valid arguments. This is a good strategy no matter who you are arguing with.

     

    Having said that, generally speaking on FJ, you will receive VERY short shrift if your opinion, no matter how politely expressed, is religiously fanatical, racist, sexist, ableist, ageist or homophobic. Although FJ does not have a hive mind, it is fair to say that the tone of thought on here is quite liberal.

     

     

    dawbs said:
    Sometimes, two views can't co-exist.

     

    For example, someone who is on a restrictive diet and restrictive budget may find it nigh IMPOSSIBLE to go a day without ingesting peanut butter. Someone one who is deathly and severely allergic to peanut butter probably finds it impossible to be around it. For most folks, there's a middle ground. For the 2 most extreme positions, there probably isn't a middle ground.

     

     

     

    Vaccines:

    More Anti-Vaxers

    My sister's encounter with a fundie in the doctor's offce

    The cost of the no vaxer's

    Forget anti-vaxers, now we have anti-antibiotics

     

    Spanking and Corporal Punishment:

    Anderson Cooper Rocks/Pearls=Another Death (MERGED)

    Holy crap. Kendull is adopting {merged}

    NON-fundy parents how would you handle this

    Quick argument against Biblical corporal punishment

    The Great Chick-fil-A Snake Oil "Faith" Hustle

     

    Adoption Done Wrong:

    Adoption is War

    Lyndsie's adoption story

    Child Collectors Extraordinaire

    Once again, this adoptive mom is pissing me off

    An African Child: Get Yours Today!

     

    Homeschooling:

     

    Circumcision:

    Babies' Bodily Rights Trump Religious Views on Circumcision

     

    Breastfeeding:

    Peanut Butter:

    The one and only peanut butter war

    Car Seats:

    There have been other discussions but with the latest generation of Duggars it's becoming epidemic:

    There are other threads about some of these topics in AYTFJ, and on the Yuku boards.

     

    If you come across an epic topic or thread that should be added to this list, PM a helpmeet.