Edens Year 3: The Year with No Stove
So it's been 2 years and 2.3 kids and year 3 started with this...
Another fire! Clearly Eva should never bake again. Although no humans were hurt, the stove and neighboring counter were completely burnt, and there was no money to replace them. The Edens got very sick of autumn salad and BLTs, but in general year three was pretty good to them. While Eva put the kids to bed and did all the chores, Adam stayed up late writing reports on how Hobby Lobby was doing the Lord's work, (such as building a Museum of the Bible on the National Mall https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2016/01/can-hobby-lobby-buy-the-bible/419088/)
and the Lord personally rewarded him with a promotion to assistant manager! God is so good y'all! Eva was still able to actually parent her little Blessings, and Genesis retained an affinity for the bathroom in which she was born. (Also notice the stove in the background, blackened and burnt to remind the Edens that to ash they would return. Fun.)
Genesis also learned how to go down stairs PRAISE JESUS!!!
(I've Eva has since decided that climbing stairs is the godliest skill a toddler can learn, and the highest priority for little Edens. The Lord wouldn't want her to carry a toddler when she's 13 months pregnant, would He?) Speaking of which, Eva has been pregnant FOREVER. Internet forums were beginning to reach Jill-level hysteria on baby watch #3. Exodus even reached his first birthday while Eva continued to gestate. (Happy birthday Exodus! Thank God you got a "silly" personality instead of "fussy" like your older sister!)
Finally, about 14 months into pregnancy, while Eva was starving and exhausted, labor pains began. This moment also coincided with Genesis inconsolably throwing a fit, and the downstairs toilet breaking in spectacular fashion. Not even the giant stuffed teddy purposed to serve as temporary babysitter could rescue Eva from this desperate situation. (The picture doesn't do it justice guys, but things were ROUGH. Eva's hunger and fatigue were well into the red and there was only salad to eat, Genesis wouldn't stop crying, Exodus was hungry, the toilet was spewing goodness knows what, and Eva already had a -40 moodlet from being actively in labor.)
Into all this chaos, baby #3 was born. Welcome to the world, little Leviticus! We can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for you!
Immediately after delivery, Eva took a nap and left her toddlers to fend for themselves and open the door for the toilet repairman.
And in the sake of honesty, I used a cheat at this point to max all of Eva's motives (satisfy all her needs). So I would actually consider two toddlers under 3 + brand new baby to be Eva's first breaking point (and understandably so!!!). But God would never give them more than they could handle, right? Eva will just need to better manage her contentment. And it couldn't be that bad - no grifting this year! Adam's promotion paid for boy's room furnishings, and the Edens were still able to get everyone to sleep at the same time. Well, except for Eva, who was of course up doing laundry. Does the Lord have a laundryroom breakdown in store for Eva? We'll just have to stay tuned!
And so year 3 ends with 3 children under 3 (how perfect!), a useless giant teddy bear, still no stove, and no new blessing immediately on the horizon. Let's see how long it lasts! Edens out!
- 6
- 1
2 Comments
Recommended Comments
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now