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Ranford Family Blog

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Ranfords, Days 11 - 12: The Series of Unfortunate Events

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AlwaysExcited

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Ok, folks, 
Reed's birth was huge blessing and all, but Ranfords soon started to worry about Satans shenanigans. Because something was wrong, and it had nothing to do with them or their choices.  
First of all, Viola couldnt get pregnant right after giving birth, although Ranfords sure did everything they could about it. 
Poor tent can confirm. O.O

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Zacahary was devastated. Will Reed reach his toddlerhood without being a big brother? Will Viola end up having less than 10 children?? Will Zacahary grow old without a quiver full of red haired arrows to show off as a sign of his manliness??? 

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Second, even with only one child, parenting was hard. Like, baby sometimes cried and was stinky. Putting him in muddles didn't help. 

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Admittedly, Ranfords practiced hands-off parenting, sometimes literally  

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But can you blame them? (Well, I can). They had sooo much work, folks. Winter was coming, so they had to fill the refrigerator with food. I mean, Viola had. Zachary did manly work. 

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But Ranfords still knew they were doing the right thing. They received small, encouraging blessings every day.
For example, Zachary got a fishing talent badge, although he had only catched one fish in his entire life. 
That does, of course, prove that they are Right Kind of Christians and everything will be provided for them. Somehow. 

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Reed grew up into toddler (and Viola wasn't pregnant yet.). He looks like his daddy. He is somewhat neat, very active and outgoing, maximally playful and extremely grouchy. Oh-uh. Little cult leader in making. 
There was no cake or anything. As his birthday present Reed received a new outfit. A proper boy outfit, not that girly pink thing he grew up into. 

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His parents, however, celebrated with sweat fellowshiping. And heard a chime! Stranger yelled on them again, just like when they got pregnant with Reed! Its a sign. 
Townie left angry and frustrated, probably to start #FreeReed movement. 

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Although pregnant again, Viola still sometimes felt doubts about this lifestyle. As much as she tried to convince herself, count her blessings and control her own thought life, she didn't see a way for this to work out. To keep it sweat and submissive, she took her anger out on garden gnome. 

Viola (inside): "You will never be republican senator, idiot, you can't even figure out how to build a proper house!"
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Did I mention that Zachary finished kitchen? Because he did. Viola now could grill their hotdogs inside. 
Only the first time she did, a fire started! (Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa - forgot that grills shouldn't be used inside.)

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Fire! Fire! What do you do when fire starts at your home?! Zach had no clue. 

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Reed, being smarter than his parents, left the room and entertained himself till it was over. 

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Viola almost burned to death, but Zachary saved her. (Viola now can use it as metaphor to talk about Hell and Faith.)

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Finally fire burned out. Ranfords lost a grill, a fridge and few old boxes. The biggest loss was food that burned with furniture. 

BUT GUYS! There is a great testimony in it all!!! The SIGN OF RIGHTEOUSNESS! THE TOTAL BLESSING.
 THE FIRST BUMP OF PREGNANCY! It sure means... Something.

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Viola was so tired she fell asleep right there.  Zachary worried about her dangerously low needs, possible death and their lost furniture. 
This is going to be a looooooooooooong pregnancy.

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  • Posts

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      Posted

      I think the problem is that TLC knows that most of their viewership is coming not from people who want to watch a Duggar documentary, but from people who like the glossy, cheesy, People-Magazine-article-come-to-life style episodes. They're still not getting all that many viewers, but more than they would if they went for a documentary style show. TLC ceased to be 'the learning channel' many moons ago.

      • Upvote 2
    • MoonFace

      Posted

      3 hours ago, samurai_sarah said:

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      • Upvote 1
    • Lurker

      Posted (edited)

      I grew up in Manhattan.  Almost everyone I knew Catholic, and your home parish  was defined by your address.  My parents had friends that were of other religions, but no one ever asked.

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      Edited by Lurker
    • HarryPotterFan

      Posted

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    • FleeJanaFree

      Posted

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      • Upvote 1


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