That is why we are pointed to Jesus’ love and not our own as the example that we are to follow and pursue.
His love is the example that we are to emulate. We are never pointed to ourselves as the standard, but rather to him.
This means that even when your wife or husband is likewise exhaustively unfaithful, cruel, hurtful, adulterous, messy, spiteful, unforgiving, unrepentant, and bruising in their betrayals over a period of weeks, months, years, decades, that you love them still and treat them as Christ does. Will Christ break his covenant? Will he cease to pray for her? Will he cease to woo and draw her back? Will he cease to seek to cleanse and wash her? Will he cease to forgive her? Will he abandon his bride?
When you find your wife in bed with another man, or when you find porn all over his computer, or when everything he does disappoints you, or when his inability to spend money wisely is causing your hair to fall out, or when you can’t relate or understand each other anymore, or when you haven’t had sex in over a year, or when your child is murdered and you blame each other, or when every word is a spiteful twist of the knife and you can’t stand the sight of each other and find yourself begging God to release you from this marriage.
Will you love your wife like Christ loves the Church, or will you love your wife like the Church Loves Christ?