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FJ Reviews & Recaps

A group blog by FJ Bloggers in General

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About this blog

A collaborative effort from Free Jinger members to review and recap books, movies and tv shows.

Entries in this blog

Flowers in the Attic: "Our Mother's Surprise" (Part 2)

I have gained weight and my underwire is poking into my boobs. It's very uncomfortable, and yet, I'm ever so grateful that I have a bra at all, unlike Cathy.  Cathy is waxing poetic about love, as many people have done throughout history. It's raining. The twins are watching TV. Chris and Cathy are laying on the old mattress in the attic, reading a book that their mother brought up from the downstairs library. They argue over each other's reading style.  The book they are reading is li
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

9

Flowers in the Attic: "Our Mother's Surprise" (Part 1)

Chris and Cathy go another 10 days without seeing their "mother." During these 10 days, they speculate for hours about why she went to Europe. They think of it as a punishment, so when she finally does show up again, they don't demand to be let out. They are "quiet, timid, and accepting." They believe they can not escape using the sheets, because the twins go hysterical on the roof.  Because they are so "respectful," "momma" laughs and spins around, telling them how HAPPY she is. She begs t
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

6

Flowers in the Attic: "At Last, Momma" (Part II)

Guess who's back? Back again.  Momma's back.  Tell your friends.  Oh, wait, Chris and Cathy don't have friends, because their selfish, terrible, inconsiderate mother (who is out-of-this world beautiful & wonderful and smells great and wears flimy negligee while interacting with her children) locked them in a room in Foxworth Hall.  In case you were interested, Corrine is wearing a "beautiful lightweight suit, with soft gray fur at the cuffs and around the neck of the
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

20

Flowers in the Attic: "At Last, Momma"

I am on the second paragraph of this chapter and it seems like the last chapter was a short story she wrote about this family and jammed it in. This chapter opens with a reminder of the whipping, but no lasting repercussions. Just that Cathy & Chris never discussed them. She often catches him staring at her. (PSST, that's because he's a teenage boy with no role models, a neckbeard spirit, and "nice guy" vibes)  Paragraph two is where the reader is once again reminded that Cathy has brea
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

0

Flowers in the Attic: "To Find a Friend"

This installment of the bestest ever book series opens with a scintillating passage.  Isn't that just the definition of scintillating? Clever, skillful writing.  Chris yells "What the hell is going on now?" which is another one of Grandmother's rules. The rules that have been conveniently been forgotten as they watch TV. I don't see them staring at books they can't read for five hours a day, anymore.  Cory is upset because one of the mousetraps has worked, and there is a mouse w
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

4

Flowers in the Attic:"One Rainy Afternoon"

One Rainy Afternoon (Page 269 Kindle)  This stock photo makes me laugh. Completely unrelated to anything happening in the book.  He keeps coming up in my searches, and I was going to write a story about him, but I'm feeling uninspired. I suppose I still can. I'm going to call him "Gary." Gary is a mans-man, he's not a beta soy boy cuck, he likes to forge metal and drive a truck. He's the guy that Donald Trump aspires to be, despite his disproportionately small hands. After Gary makes
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

3

Flowers in the Attic: "A Taste of Heaven" (Part 2)

Oh boy, here we go again. To distract myself from the rage inducing political nonsense that is going on (We have SERIOUS issues in the US, and it's not just guns and the economy and Trump, it's a serious undercurrent of anti-intellectual propaganda and ridiculousness) I have decided, once again, to reduce my blood pressure by laughing at the absurdity of a novel about incest. Fun fact: My local newspaper won't let me use the word "incest" in the comment section, which is really fun when trying t
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

10

Flowers in the Attic: "A Taste of Heaven" (Part 1)

This chapter is called "A Taste of Heaven." And that's all I have to say about that. Make your own jokes about heaven.  Cathy & Chris climb down the rope ladder. It's night, the moon is out. It takes less than ten minutes for her to climb down. She gets down and he hugs her close. Boundaries, Chris.  All the rooms of Foxworth Hall are dark, but the "servant's quarters" are bright yellow. I have written several snarky paragraphs about this but they might be taken wrong. Regardless,
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

7

Flowers in the Attic: "Growing Up, Growing Wiser" (Part 2)

I quit yesterday with one page left in this chapter. I had no idea. I would have finished had I known. No matter. We'll finish it now. To recap yesterday's work:  The impossibly blonde and beautiful blue-eyed bimbo Cathy and her hunk of burning love brother Christopher (hereby known as Chris, to avoid mix-ups with his father, also called Christopher.) play monopoly after being starved in an attic for several weeks while baby-sitting their younger siblings. Who are also very blonde and attra
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

7

Flowers in the Attic: "Growing Up, Growing Wiser"

PART TWO.  Apparently, I don't have enough to do at work, so I'm back. Or I just really like the external validation I get from the compliments of my snarky recaps of a book that was written around the time that Brett Kavanaugh was sexually assaulting teenage girls. BTW, I really do enjoy compliments on my typo-riddled column, or articles, or whatever you think these should be classified as.  Part Two starts off with a quote from The Song of Solomon, verse two, chapter 17. For those of
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

9

Black Mirror Episodes Ranked from Worst to Best 19-11

If you don't know about Black Mirror yet (and you are into TV shows that make you feel depressed about the future, bleak about technology, and occasionally just meh about humanity) then get yourself to Netflix ASAP. If you DO know about Black Mirror and haven't seen it, congratulations! You might still have hope for the future!  That being said, some episodes are better than others. I'm here to try and rank them according to my rather arbitrary standards. SPOILERS. (Also, this is really dif
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

2

Flowers in the Attic: "The Long Winter, and Spring, and Summer"

The Long Winter, and Spring, and Summer. Pages 215-230 (Kindle).  If I make it through these 15 pages, we will be done with Part 1 of this book!  Recap: Cathy and her siblings are trapped in an attic. I believe they are literally locked it, but they are also emotionally trapped. Their mother is a piece of gold-digging trash, and their grandmother would punish the Maxwells for having too much fun. On Christmas, the downstairs people had a party while the children upstairs skulked around
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

7

Flowers in the Attic: "Christopher's Exploration and Its Repercussions" Part 1

Christopher's Exploration and Its Repercussions: Pages 202 - 215 (Kindle)  At the end of the last chapter, Cathy climbs in bed with her sister, while Chris dresses up like Groucho Marx and goes exploring while a rip-roaring Gatsby party rages on in the Foxworth Mansion. We were treated to descriptions of how they had to pee, what the guests ate, and Cathy's inappropriate thoughts about her brother.  Said brother stared at his mom's boobs. If they hadn't been locked in a room together, they
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

6

Flowers in the Attic: "The Christmas Party"

The Christmas Party - Pages 190- 202 (Kindle)  Somehow, I managed to miss the last page of the last chapter where Momma tells Christopher and Cathy they can hide and look at the party. Maybe I was too busy thinking about what Corrine could have done, instead of locking her children in an attic, asking the older ones to raise the little ones, and eventually poisoning them with arsenic donuts. When faced with a life changing situation such as being a widow, what would you do? A) ask your moth
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

1

Flowers in the Attic: "Holidays" Part 2

Holidays: Part 2 (Page 176)  I forgot to mention a very crucial plot point yesterday. Cathy asks for bananas and Mother refuses because her father doesn't care for them. Yup. Was there no editor at whatever publishing firm took on this mess?  It is now Christmas Eve and the children have been "living" at Foxworth Hall for 5 months. They still have not seen the entire house. To be fair, I'm certain that the staff hasn't seen the entire house, either. They are still saying grace before e
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

11

Flowers in the Attic: "Holidays" Part 1

Holidays: Part 1  This chapter opens with two paragraphs of "symbolic" text about the amaryllis. Much like winter, Christmas and Thanksgiving are coming. They've been in the attic for 100 days. I feel claustrophobic just thinking about that. They don't even have a tv yet, much less the internet (not invented for civilian use as of the writing of this novel, nor when it takes place.) They also do not have video games. I mean, I could probably survive 100 days in an attic with relatively litt
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

6

Flowers in the Attic: "To Make a Garden Grow" Part 2

To Make a Garden Grow: Chapter 8, Part 2 I'm back.  It's been two months in the attic. It's almost been two months since I last posted on this blog. This was not intentional.  Cathy waxes non poetically about love, truth, and faith. Her grandfather is still alive. They watch the summer turn into fall from their window seats in the mansion's attic. Christopher is unreasonably positive while she shares her pessimistic and self-involved thoughts with us. We are treated to a discussio
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

9

Flowers in the Attic: "To Make a Garden Grow"

To Make a Garden Grow: Chapter 8, Part 1.  I'm on page 127 for those reading along. (I don't recommend it at all.)  Cathy refers to Christopher as "my cheerful optimist," Which is weird. Christopher also states that "any day could see him gone. That is the way of heart disease. A clot could break free and find its way to his heart or lung and snuff him out like a candle." I stand by my previous assessment that Christopher Jr is a neckbeard.  Chris Jr orders her to have more determ
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

4

Flowers in the Attic: "Minutes Like Hours"

Minutes Like Hours: Page 112 of 411 (Kindle Version)  Jesus. I'm on page 112. I now understand why Fred Clark's Left Behind Fridays have been going on for years.  Just like this book.  We get a paragraph of melodramatic teenage thoughts that lead me to believe that I could have been a much better writer had I not ever read such pondering about time.  Then we get a paragraph of "what Chris thinks" about the same thing she was just thinking about.  Momma comes to see the
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

10

Flowers in the Attic: Momma's Story

Chapter 6: Momma's Story  The Grandmother (yes, Cathy refers to her captor as "the grandmother" which is somewhat awkward, but I suppose it makes sense.) has left the room. Momma is still half naked and Cathy's "heart fluttered madly" as she watched her mother button up her blouse. Momma, unsurprisingly, downplays the abuse. Momma says that she should have warned the children that the grandparents are fanatically religious.  "Momma" then details her upbringing. It's all very boilerplat
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

7

Flowers in the Attic: "The Wrath of God"

Chapter 5: The Wrath of God Momma's back! I know it's been, like, an entire week or two since the last chapter.  So I forgive everyone for forgetting that's been an ENTIRE DAY of not seeing their primary caregiver. If you, like me, had forgotten how long it had been, VC Andrews reminds you in the first sentence. "Momma came into our room this first night..."  "Momma" is tight-limbed and stiff-jointed. She's 33, so she's actually younger than me. I do not have 4 children locked in my hy
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

9

Flowers in the Attic: "The Attic"

Chapter 4: The Attic I realized today that though I remember finishing Charlie and the Chocolate Factory for this blog, I may have not actually posted them. If you can find anything after the chapter where Mr. Salt offers to buy his daughter a person, I'd be grateful. Otherwise I'll have to start typing up the end to that as well. I can't have half a dozen books started for the FJ blog, and none of them done. I have a reputation!  Anyway, so on to the recap of this wonderful book.
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

6

Flowers in the Attic: "The Grandmother's House"

Chapter 3: The Grandmother's House My dad's funeral is tomorrow. I've got my own VC Andrews world going on, with lots of family secrets coming out. No one has been locked into an attic and poisoned with arsenic donuts though. And, instead of a 200 year old house with a name, I'm in the armpit of the midwest in a 100 year old farm house that may or may not burn down at any moment due to bad wiring and 50 years of DIY "upgrades." Think antique tractors in the yard, chickens, several barns ful
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

9

Flowers in the Attic: "The Road to Riches"

I'm taking some time from dealing with personal/family drama/stress to recap another chapter of the masterpiece "Flowers in the Attic."  This chapter is titled "The Road to Riches." When we open, they are still packing. I've always wanted to read about what other people pack in their suitcases. What an exciting bit of prose. Christopher & Cathy "throw" their clothes into two suitcases along with a few toys and one game. So, I'm guessing that the twins have what they are wearing and that
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

2

Flowers in the Attic: Prologue & "Good-bye, Daddy"

I thought I might attempt a reread of the "classic" coming of age/incestfest novel "Flowers in the Attic." Those of us of a certain age remember reading these in secret, learning about horror and sex and rich people's games. I, however, did not read it in secret. Rather my mom checked it out of the library for me. I'm not sure why, or what about it appealed to her or if the librarian suggested it. But somehow I ended up reading this one and a number of other VC Andrews books.  For those of
Maggie Mae

Maggie Mae

24


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